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Things I’ve Never Done

I love Erin McKeown’s substack (and music!). It always makes me think. A recent issue was about things they have never done, including a particular drink from 7-11. In their circle of friends, “Slurpee” came to mean something a person hadn’t done.

We all began to use the term “slurpee” for a common cultural thing that someone had never done. We had endless afternoons, sitting in the back of my truck carefully cultivating our personal slurpee lists. At the time, some of my slurpees included never having seen “star wars,” never having worn a bikini, and never having kissed a girl.

I usually think about “I’ve nevers” as things I’d like to do one day. As in, I’ve never been to Australia. The underlying message is that I’m thinking about it because I would like to do it. And I’ve thought of “I’ve nevers” as things I’m truly proud I’ve never done. Like… rob a bank. But I’ve never thought of “I’ve nevers” as this thing in between: Not a bad thing (robbing a bank) and not an aspiration (Australia), but just things I haven’t done and have no intention of doing, even if someone gave me the opportunity.

What are your Slurpees?

4 comments

1 a { 11.30.22 at 11:44 am }

IDK – I find that the people who say “I’ve never seen Star Wars” are sort of proud of the fact that they’ve avoided something that seems universal. And while there are some that stop there, it seems to me that most are smug about it – like “I’m so indie, I don’t waste my time with stuff that’s POPULAR.”

Regardless, Never Have I Ever is a fun game for a reason! Trying to call out a friend for something they did that you thought was weird only to find that several others have done it is great. Then there are tons of experiences that you assume everyone has had, only to find that they’re not as common as you thought. I find that in-between place fascinating.

2 Phoenix { 11.30.22 at 8:36 pm }

I’ve never been sky diving and I don’t think I will at this point. I’ve never read Harry Potter. Not that I have anything against it, I just never got around to it and probably never will. I’ve never tried cheddar cheese on apple pie. Apparently that’s a thing? Maybe I’ll try that sometime.

3 Beth { 12.01.22 at 5:01 pm }

I’ve never done a shot of alcohol. This used to be a bigger deal when I was young and went to parties with lots of drinking. I’ve never seen The Godfather movies. I’m sure there are loads of other things but those are the two that I always think of when this topic comes up.

4 Sharon { 12.02.22 at 10:13 pm }

There are lots of things I haven’t done! I was pretty square in high school, so I haven’t done a lot of things I know that many of peers did.

Just to name a few. . . I have never tried any type of illegal/street drugs. I have no tattoos. I have never watched Steel Magnolias (or, actually, many popular TV shows and movies).

(c) 2006 Melissa S. Ford
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