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Slow Decluttering

We need to declutter. I think about it daily. We need to declutter our storage space first, and then once there is room, move some things into storage while giving other things away (or, unfortunately, throwing out). There are a lot of things in this house that no one uses anymore.

I say this a lot because I think about it a lot. My biggest fear is that I’m going to wait too close to when the twins leave for college and be unable to do it, emotionally. But I’m not really motivated to set aside relaxation time to declutter because I have so little relaxation time. So I feel the pressure of time from two sides, and in the end, I declutter small spaces here and there, leaving untouched the real work that needs to get done so I’m not surrounded by old toys and middle grade books.

I love the idea of slow decluttering, and I think that it works well for tackling the rest of the house once we have the storage space. But the storage space requires a weekend. I’m positive that I will be so much happier and settled once I take care of the storage space. It’s just finding the motivation to give up a weekend or half of two weekends.

But I have to do it. I cannot spend the rest of my life staring at unplayed board games.

9 comments

1 a { 08.07.22 at 7:34 am }

Uh, make the twins do it. Why have children if not to have an unwilling work force who can be guilted into doing the things we don’t want to do ourselves? Then, when they have gone off to college, you can fill your time revisiting all the things and deciding if you still need it.

2 Phoenix { 08.07.22 at 11:39 am }

My one goal in August is to move out of my storage unit. First, I need to unpack some more here at home and create some space for more boxes… It is going to be so awesome to finally have all of my stuff in one place after 6.5 years!

3 Beth { 08.07.22 at 4:15 pm }

Our “storage space” is our basement and I need to declutter so I can move things from the playroom and bedrooms down there. But who wants to declutter the basement? No one, as it happens. I will do it when my kids start school in a month but until then it is driving me crazy.

4 Jess { 08.07.22 at 5:14 pm }

Decluttering seems so easy, especially the way all the Pinterest and Youtube and whatever else (TikTok?) make it look simple and doable, but then somehow I always end up in a room where every surface is piled with crap and I feel overwhelmed and just want to lie facedown in it. I don’t have the same emotional complication that you do with the timing of the decluttering, but I think it might help if you do it in chunks and set reasonable goals and then when you touch stuff, have a plan for its exit. I am guilty of having bags and boxes full of stuff to donate that linger in the garage or the trunk of my car, but it feels so good to pack it up and get it gone (and also doesn’t give me time to say WAIT BUT I THINK I COULD… and “rescue” things from donate piles). Good luck — I hope your storage space is somewhere ventilated — ours is an uninsulated attic area, and it is grossly hot and stifling in there.

5 Melissa F. { 08.07.22 at 6:35 pm }

So, my twins will be college juniors this fall and I still need to do a massive decluttering of the basement. And several other areas. (I’ve tried the “make them do it” approach. Didn’t work.) My husband is much more sentimental in terms of the kids’ toys, unplayed games, clothes, etc. I’m just going to have to do it at some point but I’m dreading it.

6 Mali { 08.07.22 at 7:40 pm }

I definitely think you’re putting it off because it seems such a huge job, rather than something you can do for 15 minutes a day (leaving you time for very necessary relaxation too). And that maybe you see it as the beginning of the end, and you’re not ready for that? I’m definitely not criticising you for putting it off – given everything else you accomplish in a week! I read something recently about procrastination (I could win gold medals in it), saying that it is purely about stress. So be kind to yourself, and maybe take it in those smaller chunks, and pat yourself on the back when you do it!

That said, I didn’t clean out my stuff at my house until I got married and moved islands. So you have lots of time!

7 loribeth { 08.07.22 at 10:13 pm }

This article makes a good point. I wouldn’t recommend decluttering/purging under time stress, as I was forced to do when our move suddenly started coming together, six years ago…! Not fun!! Commit to tackling one room, and then when that’s done, start on the next one. Start now. (Take photos — I’ve found it makes it easier to let things go.) It’s soooo easy to procrastinate, but it feels so good to do it! And there are very few things I’ve gotten rid of that I regret later on (most of them books! lol — and most of those are replaceable, if I really do regret it).

8 Chris { 08.08.22 at 7:39 pm }

I was forced into a massive decluttering over the past 6 week. Not quite done yet, but I have to say as hard as it’s been I’m so glad I had to do it. The house feels lighter. The energy is better. It’s not done. But, there’s light at the end of the tunnel. But please don’t wait until forced like I was- and forced you ask? How can that be, Chris are you not an adult? How can you be forced? Well let me tell you…. Early this year my husband unexpectedly died. He was a border line hoarder. Like, his clothes went back to everythign he owned in high school. Suffice to say that was long enough ago that it’s absurd! I have nearly finished the clothes and having kept a few sentimental pieces and his suits (2) becuase I could not bear to wad them up in a garbage bag to donate? I’ve donated 46 hefty bags of clothing. Yup. 46. And, I’m not yet done. I did keep his concert tshirts because those were important to him and I’m wearing them to work out in. The rest of the stuff. Oh lord have mercy. There is ONE single piece of paper I can’t find because he was horrible about filing things at home. This piece of paper is worth a significant chunk of change to me and I’ve been tearing up the house trying to find it while also trying to meet a deadline of less than 21 days to file court papers to block someone else from getting said money, all while also dealing with the other things of death. Calling credit card companies, banks etc and when unable to resolve things being asked by more than one insititution to put my husband on the line. AFTER telling them the reason I called was because of his untimely demise. More than 1 company has gotten a complaint call from me over THAT. Borrowed from a friend: Only if you can conduct a seance. Yeah, that about sums it up. So please don’t be like me and wait until you’re dealing with the *ish that is death, just start cleaning it out now. The new energy will feel good, promise!

9 Sharon { 08.08.22 at 8:39 pm }

I also need to declutter, although perhaps not to the same extent, as we have only lived in our current house a little more than five years, and I took the opportunity of our move to purge a lot of stuff. I set goals and make plans, and I have even made a few starts — I’ve decluttered my clothing at least yearly over the past five years, and I go through my sons’ clothes at least every few months — but I never seem to have the energy and motivation to make much progress. UGH.

I have no advice to offer. I have tried lots of things — Marie Kondo’s books, related Facebook groups, two different paid virtual courses — and I still haven’t solved the problem.

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