You Have More Ended Relationships Than Current Ones
Carolyn Hax tucked it at the end of a section; a closing line free-floating away from the other thoughts:
“Most relationships end. It’s okay to let them. Truly.”
However many relationships you currently have — let’s go with Dunbar’s number and say 150 — you have quadruple or quintuple or, if you’re super-popular, dectuple, the number of ended relationships. Because relationships end. Friendships end. Acquaintanceships end.
I’m not sure why such a simple thought never occurred to me before now, and how dysfunctional social media has made things by not allowing relationships to end. That natural social shedding now sticks around, remaining in your attention like snake skin. Like a ghost.
1 comment
I love your point about social media. I have relationships that have ended in terms of any in-person anything, but they are still in a weird shadow world on facebook. I do like sometimes that you can reconnect with people that you knew in an ancillary way once but then find you have things in common later through social media, but the awkward fading away is so weird with social media. And I have really never unfriended anyone — blocked yes, but it had to be something egregious or a relation to my ex-husband for the blocking to happen, so I have all these ghost people. More ways social media gives us an unreal sense of connection with others, I guess. Thoughtful read!