I was talking with the Wolvog about bears (as one does), and I told him that I couldn’t remember which type of bear this advice went with, but there was some type of bear where you were supposed to run away. He stared at me incredulously and said, “Brown… get down. Black… fight back. White… goodnight.”

“What does that mean?” I asked.

“With a brown bear, you pretend to be dead. Spread out your limbs so it’s difficult to turn you over. It will eventually walk away. With black, fight back. That bear is terrified of you. And with white… well… you’re dead. So it doesn’t really matter what you do. But did you notice that zero percent of those solutions included running away? You’re not going to outrun a bear.”

Um… that makes a lot more sense.

Teens are full of interesting information.

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Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• None… sniff.

Okay, now my choices this week.

The Skinny Black Girl has a post about why she isn’t blogging that is perfection. I love this post so much. And it’s probably best if you read it without knowing much before going over. Though I will entice you over with this: “It’s hard to write about yourself when you’re lost. When you’re sick of yourself. When you have no idea who the hell you are anymore and you’re known for bold declarations of just that.”

No Kidding in NZ writes about encountering thoughtless commentary on her trip. It was spoken by a friend of her sister’s. She writes, “I often assess my trips here, noting if there were any instances that made me feel childLESS rather than childFREE. I am wondering if that is healthy, even while I bristle slightly at a conversation at my sister’s place.” We all have our biases, but we should also know (and sometimes need to be told) our biases.

Finally, she had me with Skeletor. Hopelessly Infertile and Surrounded by Fertiles is having a hard time being positive. On the bright side, I give her ten points for the Skeletor quote, “I don’t like to feel good. I like to feel evil.” Plus at least five extra points for finding the clip on YouTube. (P.S. Me too on the Skeletor-front.)

The roundup to the Roundup: Bear advice. Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between November 13 – 20) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week? Read the original open thread post here.

We get a lot of SPAM calls every day. Weeks ago, I let the answering machine fill up, and I haven’t erased the messages. This means that when phone solicitors call, they get a full mailbox. Yes, we have to listen to the phone ring, but we don’t have to listen to a recorded message left on our answering machine about an! exciting! offer!

I still feel partially enraged by the intrusion, but the rage level is simmering at a 3 rather than frothing at an 8. I don’t think I’ll clear the answering machine. Ever.

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I’ve told you about Beorn’s bedtime routine. The ChickieNob nicknamed the time period “the blender” because he would run frantically in a circle, and in doing so, would kick up his bedding. Kicking up his bedding would reveal the newspaper lining the bottom of his cage. And revealing the newspaper would mean that within minutes of cleaning the cage, it looked like the space had been through the blender. The newspaper would be messed up and bedding would be everywhere and I would be begging him to stop running.

But he couldn’t stop running because bedtime is too exciting.

The last time I cleaned the cage, I taped all the newspaper sheets together before I poured the bedding on top. It was the perfect solution. The newspaper no longer moves when he’s kicking up the bedding, and because it’s not crumpling, even the bedding mostly remains in place. He has been running every day, and everything still looks great.

Masking tape: It saved my sanity.

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Something making me happy right now: The latest season of The Crown. We’re finally in a time period that I lived through and remember.

There are some kashrut rules that are followed regardless of your level of observance—for example, not mixing meat and dairy—and others that differ from person-to-person.

For example, Josh and I are much stricter with meat meals. We ask that guests never bring anything to contribute to the meal when we’re serving meat, but we’re looser with dairy meals as long as the contribution is vegetarian. I’ll use a vegan ingredient if I can’t find one with a hechsher (that little symbol that tells you something is kosher) with a dairy meal. Never with a meat meal. We’ll eat vegetarian dishes from non-kosher restaurants. (I always eat vegetarian, but everyone else eats vegetarian out of the house.)

I was stricter with kashrut rules when I first met Josh, but we compromised and landed in a place where we both felt comfortable. Because you kind of need to be on the same page when it comes to keeping kosher. It doesn’t work if I keep X rules and Josh keeps Y rules if we’re using the same kitchen and kitchen equipment.

Our friends know our rules (and therefore know whether they’re comfortable eating at our place or not), and we know their level of observance. Or we ask, and then always opt for the more restrictive level because everyone can fit under the restrictive level but people with stricter needs can’t fit under a less restrictive level. It’s sort of like the no-peanut thing in classrooms: People who eat peanuts can also not eat peanuts. They lose nothing under the more restrictive rule. But people who cannot eat peanuts lose a lot under a less restrictive rule. Such as their life.

I thought this was a really perfect way to understand people’s individual COVID-19 restrictions. There are certain things everyone needs to do: wear a mask, distance from one another, stay home if ill. But the rest differs from person to person. Some are comfortable taking a walk with a friend outside. Some are not. Some will eat at a restaurant indoors, some outdoors, some not at all. Some are okay taking a risk for family but not taking a risk for a friend.

If you always opt for the most restrictive option—going with the comfort zone of the most restrictive friend or family member—you’ll both technically be comfortable. You may not both be happy, but that is something different altogether. But I’d also point out that no one is happy right now.

Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is? Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.

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Eater has an article about “house meals,” which are defined as “a dish that perhaps was once inspired by a recipe, but you’ve made it so many times, and riffed on it so often, that it bears little resemblance to any known dish. It is comfort food at its finest, a thing designed for your specific palate, with absolutely no thought paid to impressing anyone else.”

Ours is, without a doubt, this potato-and-Morningstar-vegetarian-bacon thing that Josh and I dreamed up years ago. It is so horrible-looking and horrible-sounding on paper. It is so good in your mouth. We have it at least once a month, down from once a week.

My other house meal is black beans and rice with roasted red peppers and an egg (over medium). It’s gooey and yummy and so easy to pull together without thinking.

My old house meal was a red sauce, but I’ve dropped it in favour of either Marcella Hazan’s red sauce or the one I learned from Da Mario’s last spring. So both real recipes, as opposed to the mess above which is unique to our home, and we’ll never serve it or give the recipe to anyone outside the house.

What is your house meal?

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Are you also doing #MicroblogMondays? Add your link below. The list will be open until Tuesday morning. Link to the post itself, not your blog URL. (Don’t know what that means? Please read the three rules on this post to understand the difference between a permalink to a post and a blog’s main URL.) Only personal blogs can be added to the list. I will remove any posts that are connected to businesses or are sponsored post.

As I say every month, I’m shamelessly stealing this idea from Jessica Lahey. She has a recurring monthly date where she reviews all the books she read that month. Book reviews are important for authors, and I want to get better about doing this.

So. I’m going to review them here and also online, but I’m going to do it a little differently. I’m only going to review the stuff I really liked. I don’t see a reason to spend my time writing about something I didn’t love; it’s just using up more of my energy. So only positive reviews.

These are the books I liked (or mostly liked) from October.

If We Were Villains (M. L. Rio): This is a book with plot holes. Major plot holes. Major major major plot holes. And I’m still going to recommend it because even with those plot holes, it was a great read. It reminded me of The Secret History by Donna Tartt—both in content and in pacing. I love books set in schools.

The Midnight Library (Matt Haig): This was a quick, sweet read about getting to test out all of the roads not taken in life. It was clever and wistful and hopeful. It was a book that came to me at the right time, but I think I would have been smitten with this book at any time.

Carry On (Rainbow Rowell): This was a re-read before I read the sequel, Wayward Son. I liked it the first time, but I didn’t think she stuck the landing. The story sort of wobbled apart at the end. But this read-through was a completely different experience. I thought it was a great ending, and the whole thing was well-structured. I mentioned that to ChickieNob, and she re-read it and agreed that it was much better the second time around.

Dreyer’s English (Benjamin Dreyer): This is the most enjoyable reference book you’ll ever read. It’s worth reading cover to cover because (1) the first part of the book is more story/explanation than reference and (2) you’ll know where to look when you have a question in the future.

Majesty (Katharine McGee): This is the sequel to American Royals, and I believe it’s the end of the story. Meaning, there are only going to be two books in this series, though the ending left things sort of feeling like there could be another book in the future. I liked the story and liked all the characters again. I wish it took a stronger stand with the ending. I either wanted it wrapped up tightly or left open-ended so the author could return in the future. Some characters had no fuel left in their story. Some characters were left hanging. So… read knowing that’s how it will close and be okay with the journey.

His and Hers (Alice Feeney): This was the sleeper hit of the month made all the more perfect because I also read the worst book of the year this month. (Clearly, I didn’t review that book this month because… read my rule above.) I loved this book so much that I immediately put everything else she has written on my TBR list. I thought I knew who the killer was, and I was delighted to be so incredibly wrong. Loved this book.

What did you read last month?