I read these profoundly true lines in a Substack: “Did you know that you can anticipate death for years and still feel shocked by it? It feels fake, like when midnight is a new year. Then it feels so real you cannot take a full breath.”

That perfectly captures all known endings. You see them coming. You know they are going to arrive. Even if you have the date somewhat penciled into the calendar, it is still shocking when it happens and doesn’t feel real.

This applies to some deaths, of course — the writer is talking about a death they knew was coming. But other endings, too. This is how I feel watching us hurtle through AP exams and prom on the way to graduation. We will race through summer, and then our unit will pull apart: Two heading to college. Two staying home.

I knew this was coming. I’ve been dreading it longer than I’ve been writing this blog. I’ve been writing about this moment for a long time. Now it’s here, and as I expected, I feel awful. I feel sad and overwhelmed. I am thrilled for them, proud of them, and excited for them. But I will miss them so much, and the reality is that our little unit will never go back to the same size and shape. It will change, pulling apart and expanding and sometimes crunching again. But so much of that is out of my hands.

I feel very lonely in this because people always meet my words by telling me about how great this next stage of life will be. That I have no clue how great it’s going to get. But it’s not what I need to hear. All it does is make me feel worse.

But finding those sentences above, even if they belong to a different situation, made me feel less alone.

A convergence of two ideas. I’m part of a Gamache read-along discussing Louise Penny’s series (one book per month). With each murder investigation, various town members will recount how they remember the deceased, and it usually goes on a predictable arc. Everyone remembers the deceased similarly (e.g., everyone describes them as the kindest person in Three Pines), and then they add caveats to their memory one by one as the book progresses. It’s the problem with obits in general: how do you sum up a person in a few sentences when people and relationships are complex and full of good and terrible moments?

Which is why I love the question on Grumpy Rumblings about how you want to be remembered. Do we have any say beyond doing the things that will get us remembered for those things? Without knowing how others will process our actions, we can make memories for others with broad strokes, but can we guide them to think something?

We all do things without knowing how others will perceive our actions. Even the most thoughtful questions can cut deeply, while the stingiest amount of attention may make someone feel amazing.

I hope I’m remembered well, but if Louise Penny has taught me anything, it’s that no one will ever be remembered one way.

Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is? Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.

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Space Elevator is the latest interactive website by Neal.Fun. You scroll and get a sense of what happens above you and the distance between each stage of space.

So, for instance, you can see the height various birds can fly, the height paratroopers jump, and the cruising altitude of a passenger jet. And then the Armstrong Limit. The sky changes as you go up, and the counter at the bottom tracks the height from Earth (and the counter in the top right corner tracks the temperature). I felt dizzy when I realized how high Felix Baumgartner was when he did his freefall. And then you keep going and keep going until you reach space.

It is such a brilliant way to teach something.

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Are you also doing #MicroblogMondays? Add your link below. The list will be open until Tuesday morning. Link to the post itself, not your blog URL. (Don’t know what that means? Please read the three rules on this post to understand the difference between a permalink to a post and a blog’s main URL.) Only personal blogs can be added to the list. I will remove any posts connected to businesses or sponsored posts.

The ChickieNob and Wolvog needed trifold boards for a presentation, so we swung by Staples, which meant ducking into the pen aisle because I LOVE pens. I use Pilot’s G-2s, though I am a sucker for an impulse pen purchase. A case in point: the Sharpie gel pens.

“Whoa, Sharpie gel pens. What do you think of them?” I asked.

“I think you have a pen you already know you like,” the ChickieNob said.

“But maybe I would like that pen even more. Maybe it will change my life.”

“It won’t. We’re getting G-2s because you’re holding them,” the Wolvog told me.

I bought them, and then the universe delivered AN ARTICLE ABOUT THE BEST PENS. Sometimes it’s okay that the algorithm knows your inner thoughts.

While I was happy that they acknowledged Pilot pens in multiple categories, there was no mention of the G-2, which is a superior pen. But Sharpie didn’t make the list at all. So there’s that. The twins saved me from pen disappointment.

I need to sleep in this weekend because the Coronation coverage begins at 2 am next weekend. That’s the pre-show. I believe the actual show begins closer to 5 am or 6 am, but in any case, we are getting up super early to watch. Or not going to sleep at all. Or something in between.

I’m glad it’s happening now — before college. That we can watch it together. I will clearly need a lot of coffee to get through the day.

Are you watching?

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Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second, helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. To read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “Eine Idee” (Elaine ohne Kind)

Okay, now my choices this week.

The Road Less Travelled has a post that serves as a good reminder that you never know how things will turn out. They moved closer to family to have support as they aged, and instead, they are the ones giving a lot of support at the moment. She writes, “I’m really glad we’re here and able to help out as much as we’ve been doing. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned over the past 25 years, it’s to expect the unexpected — that life rarely unfolds exactly the way we think it will.” Hopefully, they will be there when you need them, too.

Lastly, It’s Inconceivable sends a letter to her body. It has let her down. Confused her. Frustrated her. I love the ending. I’ll give you a little taste: “Body… You have frustrated me, caused me intense pain, made me wonder why you haven’t worked properly when I’ve lost baby after baby, but then you’ve also fascinated me with your resilience, how well you’ve recuperated, how you have bounced back.” Go over and read the whole thing.

The roundup to the Roundup: Waking up for the Coronation next week. Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between April 21 – April 28) and not the blog’s main URL. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week. Read the original open thread post here.