The perfect first line: “History is full of people who just didn’t.”

And then, “I like no. It’s sidewise to a reverse mantra (om). It’s stealthy, portable, and unslouching.”

Before I read that line, I though of action as better than inaction, doing as better than not doing. But so much can be accomplished — a louder statement sometimes made — when people refuse to participate. When we take a look at all the things we’re not doing and celebrate that inaction. To examine the negative spaces of our day and cheer ourselves on for protecting those inverse, quiet moments.

There is a lot of power in not doing.

So what are you not doing today?

I read a fantastic quote from T.H. White’s Once and Future King, which is the King Arthur story. Arthur comes to Merlyn, disappointed, and Merlyn answers:

The best thing for being sad… is to learn something. That is the only thing that never fails … That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting.

I love that because it’s true. When I’m in a rut or feeling unanchored, overwhelmed, upset, then learning something, finding something new to be passionate about, pulls me out of the feeling.

I can’t think of a single time I’ve sought out information and then regretted learning something new. I mean, sure, I was never thrilled being told what I had to learn in school. But making projects for myself? Choosing my own books? Looking up things that I’m curious about? Zero regrets. 100% feeling at least slightly better.

I have a project for myself right now. And it’s kind of sort of awesome to be learning new things first thing every morning.

Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is? Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.

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People magazine had an article about an infertility podcast called Infertile AF. It’s in its second season. The podcast’s description: “In this unfiltered podcast about infertility, Brooklyn-based journalist and mom-of-two Ali Prato, who went through IVF herself, talks to women—and some men—about the messy, frustrating, painful, heartbreaking, absurd and sometimes hilarious journey to have a baby. Or in some cases, to not have a baby.”

Or if listening to 42 minutes about infertility after living 42 months of infertility, I’ll direct you to my favourite new escape: Shedunnit. Someone linked to one of her older episodes, and I decided to download the first ones and listen to it in the car. It is FANTASTIC. I mean, especially if you love mysteries. But completely fascinating history stuff, too.

What are you listening to?

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Are you also doing #MicroblogMondays? Add your link below. The list will be open until Tuesday morning. Link to the post itself, not your blog URL. (Don’t know what that means? Please read the three rules on this post to understand the difference between a permalink to a post and a blog’s main URL.) Only personal blogs can be added to the list. I will remove any posts that are connected to businesses or are sponsored post.

Okay, so I get that marketers don’t do their work with the intention of upsetting people. They’re just trying to get you to notice their product. And 99% of the time, their work ranges from helpful to annoying.

But this.

Abby, a 65-year-old retiree living in Central Texas, was shocked when she received a letter addressed to her daughter Hallie. Inside the pink envelope, Abby found a purple card with an illustration of a halved avocado with a heart hovering inside its pit. “Holy guacamole!” the card said. “You’re going to avo baby!” The inscription was vague. “Congratulations!!!” someone had written in quick Sharpie. “I’m so excited for you! I hope you like these.” Signed, with a heart, Jenny B.

It’s a marketing campaign, flooding the receiver with info, coupons, and gift cards for random baby businesses. Some people they hit actually are pregnant. But other people they hit, such as Abby, have lost their child. Or have miscarried. Or aren’t planning on getting pregnant at all.

So take the sting of getting a coupon from Gerber in the mail and multiply it by 10 because you’re getting this congratulations card in the mail along with a whole slew of baby-related crap.

The idea of it made me want to kick over my mailbox.

I know it’s doctors and not marketers who make the promise to do no harm, but… it just seems like a basic line one shouldn’t cross when they’re representing such a potentially fraught situation.

I haven’t seen any reboot shows yet. I barely like reboot books that try to recapture the original magic. It’s not that it can’t be done–The Testaments was wonderful. But there have been too many times when I’ve had deep regrets catching up with beloved characters (Cursed Child springs to mind) that it has kept me from tuning in to revisit old television characters. Visual mediums have an additional hurdle when the characters no longer look or sound the same. It’s like trying to reconnect in your forties with a favourite chum you haven’t seen since preschool.

But I’m really curious about how Thirtysomething will go, and it may be the show that tips me over into the reboot zone. It’s (1) apparently focused on only four of the original group, aiming for the strongest storylines and (2) it’s about that foursome watching their kids navigate their thirties. So… an interesting take.

Plus I loved the original Thirtysomething.

Would you watch the reboot? And do you watch any reboots?

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Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• None… sniff.

Okay, now my choices this week.

You may have seen last week that Amy Schumer was asking people to text her about IVF, and Risa Kerslake did it. But this post is really about the comments Schumer received for putting her situation out there. She writes, “So Amy Schumer might be unrelatable to those of us who aren’t rich and famous, but she is still getting shitty comments like this, and that, my friends, is why infertility needs to be talked about from people of all walks of life.”

An Engineer Becomes a Mom has a post about arrival (getting through something) that ties in with infertility and resolution. How do you know when you’re resolved? When you’ve arrived on the other side of something? She writes, “For me, I’ve concluded that arrival is getting through the major crap-tastic-burn-it-down dark night of the soul so that when the next dark night comes around it’s not so earth-shattering.” I really love the questions and answers in this post.

Lastly, Dreaming in Diapers has the results from her ninth IVF cycle, and it’s upsetting. She explains: “I actually answered the call this time…most of the time I let it go to voicemail..especially if my hubby is not with me…but this time was different…I was expecting great news…and this is what I heard over the phone.” Please circle the wagons of support, but I also love this battle cry: “it’s tough………….but so am I….”

The roundup to the Roundup: Thirtysomething is coming back… maybe? Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between January 17 and January 24) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week? Read the original open thread post here.