I’m reading a book—The Safe Place by Anna Downes—and I learned a new word: Querencia. It’s a term from bullfighting (I think?) that refers to the space in the ring where the bull goes to regroup and feel safe. A ring is a circle, and there is nothing special about any particular space. But the bull chooses a place where he feels safe—despite any tangible reason to feel safe—as a favoured spot. It’s where he draws his strength.

Beorn designated the corner closest to the basement door as his querencia. He naps there, sometimes with his eyes open, watching me, and other times resting and flicking his ears, listening for the twins to come upstairs. There is nothing different about that corner except that he chose it.

I realized how much my bed is an emotional querencia. I go there to think, regroup, relax in the evening. It would be more comfortable to read on the sofa, but I usually head up and make a little nest of glasses of water and books and notebooks around me on the bed. I’m aware this behaviour probably adds to my insomnia, but it’s where I recharge.

Where is your querencia?

Things you can buy for 99 cents:

1. A box of Crayola chalk
2. A Wet and Wild eyeshadow brush
3. The e-book version of Life from Scratch

(Side note: It is really really really difficult to find 99 cents items on Amazon.)

My first fiction book is on sale for the next few days for less than a cup of coffee. Pick up Life from Scratch for yourself. Or a friend. Or your neighbour. Or your cousin. Or a random person that you spotted in a recent Zoom meeting.

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Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• None… sniff.

Okay, now my choices this week.

Infertile Phoenix has a post about changing her name after her divorce that was so thought-provoking. What happens if you change your name because you want to share a family name with your future children, but then you don’t have future children? I really loved hearing this perspective.

Finding a Different Path writes about a classroom conversation on The Giver. It’s not just the conversation on babies and the implications of this science fiction society. It’s her co-teacher driving home the myth that IVF works for everyone. She explains: “Normally I might have shared bits of my story with the students by now, but the weird schedule and the masks have kind of inhibited that personal connection.” So hopefully her students caught her correction because no person should be walking through this world thinking assisted reproduction is a given.

A Half-Baked Life has a post about scars; the ones you can see and the ones you can’t. This was a scarring year for many many many people. She explains, “Our scars make us who we are. They interrupt the flat expanse of grey with something else, reminders of something deeper, reminders that we are more than what we see on the surface.” Love that.

Lastly, there were a lot of posts about the last “normal” week before the pandemic. Res Cogitatae walks through the change over; from knowing about the virus to the pandemic starting to a year later. This spoke to me so much: “I don’t know where I would start the process of recovering. I don’t know what I would need to feel like I can start the process of recovering.”

The roundup to the Roundup: Life from Scratch is on sale. Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between March 12 – 19) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week? Read the original open thread post here.

There was an article going around a week or two ago that everyone was gushing about. It was a celebration of cold calling—picking up the phone and just calling a friend instead of setting up a time to chat. The idea is to reintroduce spontaneity into the experience, and to return to the delight of being surprised to find a friend on the other end of the line when you pick up.

Sort of like one of the things I miss: bumping into people you know when you’re out-and-about, running errands. I haven’t had a chance meeting in the library in over a year, and I do miss that.

But I don’t miss cold calling. I have recurring calls set up with friends, and I love it because I can plan for it. I’m in the right frame of mind when we start talking, not feeling torn between wanting to catch up and wanting to finish the task I was planning to do. One of my least favourite things is talking to someone when it’s clear that I don’t have their attention, so I never want to do that to someone else.

What do you think? Are you pro-spontaneous conversation or do you like to be texted first to make sure it’s a good time to talk?

As I say every month, I’m shamelessly stealing this idea from Jessica Lahey. She has a recurring monthly date where she reviews all the books she read that month. Book reviews are important for authors, and I want to get better about doing this.

So. I’m going to review them here and also online, but I’m going to do it a little differently. I’m only going to review the stuff I really liked. I don’t see a reason to spend my time writing about something I didn’t love; it’s just using up more of my energy. So only positive reviews.

These are the books I liked (or mostly liked) from February.

The Push (Ashley Audrain): This was a hard read in the sense that it was an engaging read, and it held my attention on every page, but I didn’t understand why she wrote it; what she was trying to communicate. Its central question is what if your child is a monster? What if you give birth or are raising someone who is a dangerous human being? It didn’t really answer said question, but I’m curious where this author goes next, storytelling-wise, because I liked the writing a lot.

Fellowship of the Ring (J.R.R. Tolkien): Not a first-time read by any stretch of the imagination, but it felt like a good time to spend a few minutes daily on Middle Earth. I’m re-reading all three parts this year, and it is such a nice journey with old friends.

If I Disappear (Eliza Jane Brazier): A thriller about a podcast listener trying to solve the disappearance of her favourite true crime podcast creator. It was a little far-fetched and veered into Stephen-King-just-throwing-this-creepy-thing-in-there-for-no-reason-except-to-creep-you-out territory. But overall an enjoyable read.

The Viscount Who Loved Me and An Offer From a Gentleman (Julia Quinn): Two more Bridgerton books. There’s a lot of mewling, and I gave Benedict one raised eyebrow. But the books are enjoyable, and I’m mid-way through the fourth one.

This Is Not the Jess Show (Anna Carey): The title is clunky but the book is a lot of fun. It’s literally The Truman Show, except in book form, and updated for the current era with influencers, iPhones, and social media. Similar but updated ethical questions, too, and a very interesting ending. I enjoyed this one a lot.

What did you read last month?

Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is? Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.

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Sometimes I entertain the idea that we could be vaccinated mid-summer and feel comfortable going to a beach, with masks. I know I am in the minority (maybe not?), but I’m not really comfortable with house rentals. I’m moderately uncomfortable with agency house rentals, and I’m more uncomfortable with AirBnB rentals.

I’m a hotel person. I like knowing what I’m going to get. I like knowing someone is on-site if things go wrong. I like meeting other people in the common areas. I just like hotels.

But rentals feel like a safer bet right now. It depends on the hotel, and it depends on the rental, but being alone in your own space feels safer than having a room in a much larger space.

I’m trying to not be such a hotel person in my head on the off-chance that we get vaccinated, can go on a short trip, but still want to mitigate risk as much as possible.

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Are you also doing #MicroblogMondays? Add your link below. The list will be open until Tuesday morning. Link to the post itself, not your blog URL. (Don’t know what that means? Please read the three rules on this post to understand the difference between a permalink to a post and a blog’s main URL.) Only personal blogs can be added to the list. I will remove any posts that are connected to businesses or are sponsored post.