We have accounts with a few streaming services, but I think we’ll give up a bunch of them when the kids leave for college. The conversation about Netflix morphed into a discussion about streaming services in general in one of my Facebook groups, and I learned that the kids would only be able to access one of our services (where I purchased five user slots) once they leave home.

So they can use Hulu while in the house, but once they move out to a dorm, we need to get them their own account for the months they’re away.

On the one hand, I get it. They’re not technically at home. But on the other hand, college is not living independently. They’re still coming home for breaks and the summer — a temporary situation with more in common with long-term travel than an established separate life. I doubt they’ll have much time to use the services while away, so better to cancel them and bring them back for a few months over winter break or summer.

I wish more services would shift to selling slots, and then I’d leave them running all year. Or make shows available for sale on another platform after some time. We used to buy shows we wanted to see a year or so after release. Now most shows never go on sale to own, so you need to keep up the streaming service to watch them again.

This system doesn’t really work for us anymore.

Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is? Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.

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I recently learned about a fantastic group that shields kids entering LGBTQIA+ events called Parasol Patrol. You can volunteer in your area and show up with a rainbow umbrella to create a safe walkway for kids entering a building so they don’t see protesters outside. I started crying looking through the site because it’s unbelievable that we need something like this — that adults would scream things at kids. But then my feelings shifted to enormous gratitude that this exists.

You can volunteer or donate on the site or read more about the group via numerous news articles.

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Are you also doing #MicroblogMondays? Add your link below. The list will be open until Tuesday morning. Link to the post itself, not your blog URL. (Don’t know what that means? Please read the three rules on this post to understand the difference between a permalink to a post and a blog’s main URL.) Only personal blogs can be added to the list. I will remove any posts connected to businesses or sponsored posts.

Oliver Burkeman mentioned a book and idea in a recent post about intrusive thoughts that resonated with me. The book is The Path to Aliveness by Christian Dillo, and the idea is not to try to bar these thoughts from entering your mind but to adjust your level of hospitality when they get there.

He writes,

“The host’s job is not to barricade the door but instead just not serve any tea.” Maybe I can’t exactly let go of my counterproductive thoughts – but I can resist the temptation to indulge them, metaphorically inviting them to sprawl on the sofa for hours at a time, with a nice hot drink and a generous slice of cake.

I loop through the same anxious what-ifs at 1 am, essentially serving those thoughts tea, cake, and asking if they’d like to take my kitchen table while they’re at it. I’ve been trying to set down the teapot and instead literally think about myself taking back a cup of tea and holding it for myself instead of letting those negative thoughts get comfortable. Does it always work? No. But having a visual when I realize I’m doing it has been helpful.

The Substack (Loribeth is so right! Substacks are blogs in disguise.) Notes from Three Pines is hosting an ongoing Inspector Gamache read-along. It kicks off on February 22, so you have time to read the first book (Still Life). I will jump in because my old book club closed down, and I’m looking for a more structured community beyond Goodreads. But not too structured because I don’t want to leave my house.

Does anyone else want to join along? And then go on a road trip to the greater Montreal area?

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Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second, helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. To read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “Who Gets To Grieve?” (Stirrup Queens) – thanks, Jess!

Okay, now my choices this week.

The Road Less Travelled has a really sweet blog post complete with drawn portrait. The artist is her great-nephew. She writes: “I asked him if the two lines coming out of the bottom of my head were legs and/or feet. ‘Socks!’ he corrected me.” Go over and see the proud auntie’s new portrait.

Lastly, Infertile Phoenix finally has an answer to a friendship that went on hold and is now back. It’s a story of two paths to living without children that diverged and came back together. I appreciated the nuance she brought to understanding both sides — the decision not to pursue parenthood and the grief over not having children. She writes about the woman’s mother: “I understand my friend’s complete annoyance and even anger, but I also completely empathize with her mom. Her mom is feeling a deep, deep pain that nobody can help her with. It got me thinking about the disenfranchised grief and the ambiguous loss involved with grandchildlessness.” It’s a profound post.

The roundup to the Roundup: Come read Louise Penny books with me. Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between January 27 – February 3) and not the blog’s main URL. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week? Read the original open thread post here.

There was a book on sale about your personality’s colour. I didn’t want to purchase it or do the test. It seemed easier to poll everyone in the room on my personality’s colour. We decided on a dark blue.

I asked what number I would be if I were a number. Which element if I were a witch? And finally, which letter of the alphabet would I be if I were a single letter?

“An M,” everyone decided. Not because my name begins with an M but because I’m a little spiky and rigid, but I slot nicely into many words.

A perfect statement of who I am. An M.

I loved Ness Labs’ recent post about change fatigue. It perfectly describes the spikiness that comes out in reaction to change. She explains, “Change fatigue [is] a feeling of resistance or resignation in the face of Change. When things keep on changing, and we don’t feel in control, our adaptive systems start breaking down.”

I haven’t been feeling in control because I’m not in control. The twins are going off to college whether I like it or not. It’s what happens next (life beyond this home), and they’re stepping into it whether I’m ready. But knowing this term helps me get my brain around why I feel like falling apart over buying and getting accustomed to a new vacuum or learning one more new tool.

How do you do with change?