Category — Friday Blog Roundup

I have developed an intense Picmonkey addiction.  To the point where my dreams have text floating across opaque banners.  The thing I love most about Picmonkey: no one taught me how to use it.  It’s that intuitive.

I avoided it at first because it felt like one more piece of software to learn.  But then one day, I needed to add words to an image like so.

Then I realized that I could give myself a snowman lover.

And finally, it fulfills all my drooling blood needs without me needing to actually get blood pooling on my chin.

Apologies in advance for the slew of zombified photos coming down the pike.

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I am having a reading renaissance.  I was in a valley, taking weeks to finish a book.  Which meant I wasn’t reading many books overall when I looked at my year.  I couldn’t complete one of the numerous reading challenges floating around the Internet because I was too slow.

And then suddenly, I started reading a lot.  Finishing books in a few days.

Here is the odd thing: I didn’t gain more time or trade reading for something else.  I just started going through books at a faster pace.  Non-fiction, literary fiction, young adult novels.  In paper.  On the iPad.  It didn’t matter the content or the medium: I just started reading faster.

Thank you, eyes.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “The Pail Sea” (Stupid Stork)
• “Boys Can’t Be Princesses: Thoughts on Gender Norms” (Stumbling Gracefully)
• “Some Reminders for Later in Life for When I Need Them” (Real Life & Thereafter)
• “It’s Okay to Give up on Your Dreams” (The Five Year Plan)

Okay, now my choices this week.

Persnickety Chickadee has a post that resonated with me about mild depression.  She tells an interesting fact about how stress affects serotonin levels that made sense.  The post moves in anything but aimless circles.  Contemplative circles, yes.  Aimless, no.

On a weekend that contains Mother’s Day, I want to highlight Bionic Mamas post about six months out from losing her mother.  She writes, “Six months in, everything about having a dead mother is still awful. In case you were wondering. Someone remarked today that there is no proper timeline, take as long as you need, but I think the truth might be that there is no timeline at all, that this just continues to suck, world without end.”  Holding her in my heart on a very hard weekend.

Lastly, The Road Less Travelled has a post about seeing her freshman year roommate on the street, but walking past without stopping.  The story of their friendship unfolds in the post, and it’s both familiar and unique at the same time.  I love friendship stories, so perhaps that’s what drew me to the post.

The roundup to the Roundup: I have a Picmonkey addiction.  Reading a lot.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between May 2nd and May 9th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

One last one.  Truman graduating from elementary school. (He’s like 11 in human years.)

I am aware that I often sound as if I am one step away from smashing my mobile device and living off the grid, but this week is #chooseprivacy week — an initiative of the American Library Association — and you know that I can’t resist sharing with you one of my loving reminders about data mining.  I’m not encouraging any of us to throw out the baby with the bathwater: I fully participate in the online world and have a plethora of apps on my phone.  I write all of this to do what the ALA states as their mission: to level the playing field.  They’re collecting data on YOU, therefore, you should know about them.

Who is “them”?  Data miners.  They’re likely on my blog without me knowing definitely.  I’m sure that by downloading plug-ins, I’ve also allowed third parties to track the movements of visitors.  Before you go running to the hills, they are on ALL of our sites.  Even 60 Minutes, who recently did an expose on data mining, found many third-party collectors on their own site.  Data is being collected on every single site on the Internet and from every single app on your phone.

It doesn’t even matter if you go online or download an app; you are still being tracked: via your credit card, closed-circuit tv, GPS.

Most of this data mining is being used to target sell products.  Some of it is being used by employers or government agencies, but data miners are much more akin to mosquitoes than sharks.  They’re annoying, persistent, and aim to drain you of your spending dollars.  We don’t think of data miners as dangerous any more than we think of mosquitoes as dangerous.  But… surely you’ve seen Bill Gates’s infographic?  Sharks kill on average 10 people per year.  Mosquitoes kill on average 725,000.

Gulp.

So let’s not just brush aside those mosquito-like data miners.

I wrote a piece about the ALA’s #chooseprivacy week for BlogHer.  Would love it if you checked it out and then rocked back and forth with me, immobilized by the sheer vastness of how much privacy we give away on a daily basis.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “I Can’t Do Baby Showers…” (Disney Baby)
• “Resolve to Know More” (Waltzing in Galoshes)
• “Motherhood Mondays: What if You Can’t Have a Baby?” (A Cup of Jo)

Plus a note: I didn’t include a post because the person had copied it word-for-word from another site.  That is technically content theft.  But the second site had copied it word-for-word from another site.  A quick Google search of a phrase from the post brought up hundreds of sites all copying the same words and not attributing them to the original owner.  It’s a great post, but credit needs to be given.  I was able to trace it back to 2004, 2005, and 2007.  No name given on any of these postings.  And I don’t think anyone realizes when they read it that it was someone else’s work.  Anyone have a clue who put together the original post?

Okay, now my choices this week.

A few more great NIAW posts popped up post-NIAW.  Climbing the Pomegranate Tree has a post about why she was late with her NIAW post.  After a conversation with a friend, a comment from the discussion is bugging her and she finally realizes why it has gotten under her skin.  She astutely writes, “Infertility is a DISEASE. Yeah, it isn’t life-threatening, so I’m not upset that we’re not publicly racing for a cure the way we are for cancer or HIV or anything, but that doesn’t change the fact that the WHO classifies it as a DISEASE. And as victims of this disease, we are sometimes treated like children who want a puppy, not like women who have a disease and deserve a chance to move past it.”  Love that, right?  Go read the whole post.

Lavender Luz has a Mother’s Day survival guide.  She not only gives concrete ways to emotionally get through the day, but she has a roundup of resources, putting into action the advice she gives to connect with others in a like situation.

Lastly, Family Rocks: The Life of Peg has a sobering post about living in three worlds at the same time.  When she agreed to be her nieces’ guardian in the event of her sibling’s death, she had no idea how that decision would change the lives of so many people when it had to be put into action.  It is a very moving post about what could happen when you say “yes” to the question you can’t say “no” to.  There are no regrets about her “yes,” but it is a moving post on the far-reaching effects of a single decision.

The roundup to the Roundup: We’re giving away our privacy, and we should know more about it.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between April 25th and May 2nd) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

I’ve never really struggled with seasonal allergies.  It’s a fact that I’m sort of proud of.  I may or may not have put it on my resume.  But this spring, the Pollen Vortex (spring’s response to winter’s Polar Vortex) is hitting me hard.  I finally gave in at the beginning of the week and got Allegra.

It took a lot for me to put the box of allergy medication in my shopping cart despite feeling like crap.  I felt like grabbing the woman stocking medicines at the end of the aisle and shouting in her face, “I don’t have allergies!  I don’t need this.”  But I didn’t do that because that would be inappropriate and wholly false.  My watery eyes, sneezing nose, and itchy throat were all evidence to the contrary.

So I took my first Allegra, and an hour later, I felt like a different person.  Everything on my face had dried up.  The pressure in my head receded.  I felt foolish that I had waited so long to try Allegra; what was the big deal about admitting I had allergies?  I marveled at how quickly the medicine acted, and people informed me that it likely wasn’t the medicine at all since it takes days to get up to full strength.  I am choosing to ignore this fact.

I am a new woman.  A new, much dryer woman.

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Speaking of my watery eyes, did you know that just as you are right handed or left handed, you are also right-eye dominant or left-eye dominant?  I didn’t know this until this week.  But I discovered during an email exchange that I am right handed but left eye dominant.  This explains why I have terrible aim.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “A Blast to the Head” (A Crack in Everything)
• “25 Worst Expression to Say to an Infertile Friend” (Waiting for Baby Bird)

Okay, now my choices this week.

It’s NIAW, so obviously, a lot of the posts in the blogosphere either addressed the theme or discussed NIAW in general.

Searching for Our Silver Lining has a post about the emotional impact of infertility.  She addresses how isolating an experience infertility can be when you are surrounded by people easily conceiving and delivering babies.  She writes, “With each surprise pregnancy announcement from others on the heels of another BFN or miscarriage, stealing ourselves became survival mechanism.”  It’s a great post that should be shared near and far.

Where the *Bleep* is Our Stork also has a NIAW post, responding to an insensitive sentiment posted on a blog.  She takes us through her anger and doubt and confusion and finally to the peace that comes when she realizes how much love she has known in this world.  I absolutely love the final two paragraphs of the post.

The Great Big IF has a post about why she didn’t write a NIAW post this year despite intending to do so.  She writes about how infertility drains her emotionally, keeping her from both reaching out to others also experiencing infertility as well as diving into non-IF endeavours.  She writes, “So, while I would love to resolve to know more about a lot of things, the truth is, I’m not sure I can make that promise now. Maybe when I’m not so up to my eyeballs in my own trench I might be ready. One day.”  A very honest post.

Lastly, Bereaved and Blessed writes about the only picture she has of her whole family on the day that her daughter was born and died.  She has always had mixed feelings about this photo, especially the way she looks in it.  But a friend tells her how she sees the photograph, changing the lens through which the author views herself, holding her little girl.

The roundup to the Roundup: I may or may not have allergies.  I am left-eye dominant.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between April 18th and April 25th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

So I was about to start out this post by telling you that I was deleting Candy Crush from my mobile device. I’ve definitely slowed down in my playing. (I’m on level 421, so not making a lot of forward progress anymore.)  But moreover, I haven’t been able to have it sync with Facebook for a week or so.  This means that even if I pass a level on one device, it won’t update my progress anywhere else.  And I can’t send my friend tickets nor ask for people to send me tickets when I get to the end of an episode.

I looked online to see if anyone else was having this problem, and though I couldn’t find anyone else talking about it on Twitter, there were plenty of bulletin boards that spoke about this problem.  The two suggestions were logging into Facebook via the settings on the phone (vs. just downloading the app and signing in there) or deleting and reinstalling the app.

The first one was a no-go.  If you read the TOS and see what you are granting Facebook once you log in via your settings, you would revoke that privilege so quickly from them that Zuckerberg’s head would spin.  There is no game — not even Candy Crush — that would entice me to give Facebook that sort of access on my phone.

And the second one begged the question: if I was deleting the app, why would I reinstall it?  Why wouldn’t I just delete the app and go about the rest of my life, Candy Crush-free?

So I opened this post box to write the Roundup, and I paused to dramatically delete the app.  And then, like a junkie, I decided to reinstall just to see if it worked (and then I could always delete again).  It did.  It worked.  My device connected via Facebook, and took me back to where I had been on the map before the problem cropped up.

Deleting Candy Crush is like burning the bridge to a semi-dysfunctional friendship.  Yes, it would emotionally cocoon me to not have access ever again to the Crush.  But just as I sometimes like to get coffee with an old friend, not to rekindle the friendship back to a daily basis but to touch base with the past, I sort of like seeing that app on the phone, knowing I can sneak in a round or two before bed if I choose.  If I choose.  Because you no longer have a choke-hold on my life, King.com.  Well, you do.  But I pretend you don’t.

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YOU CAN GO TO HOGWARTS.

Esperanza told me about a LARP that fans created online where you can enroll in Hogwarts and take online classes.  It’s like University of Phoenix for the magical world.

Yes, I am enrolling.  Yes, I am going to complete all the course work.  Yes, I am going to talk about it incessantly.  Yes, the twins enrolled too which means, like Hermione, I need to help them with their homework.  Yes, I am going to neglect things like basic hygiene and eating in order to fit more Harry Potter in my life.

HOGWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARTS!

Who is joining me?

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And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “Mday” (Because We’ll Figure it Out)

Okay, now my choices this week.

Inconceivable is at the start of a pregnancy, deep in the waiting zone from beta to beta as she tries to discern what her spotting means.  She pulls in a quote from the Princess Bride that so perfectly sums up the feeling that hangs over an infertile person’s head during pregnancy.  A perfect post, though I’m hoping that like the Dread Pirate Roberts, nothing comes of the threat.

Life as I Know It has a post about her seventh blogoversary.  While she’s started and given up on many things in life, she keeps coming back to her blog, year after year.  She says it best with this simple thought, “I blog because it frees me to just be and feel.”  Hells yeah, and happy blogoversary.

Anabegins also has a post about blogging. (You know I’m a sucker for blogging about blogging!  And the fact that she named it “Meta” made me swoon.)  It’s about finding the energy to do the hard work of writing when you aren’t forced to do the hard work of writing.  And all the things she gets out of blogging in return.

Lastly, Mona Darling has a post about never being too old to try something new.  To quote the teens these days, YOLO, and this blog post embraces that idea of not waiting or making excuses to take a risk.  She writes, “Why is 40 too old to change careers? Or, 45 in my case. Don’t you don’t deserve better from life then spending a majority of your day doing something you don’t enjoy?”  The post is a rallying cry for figuring out what you want to try, and then doing it.

The roundup to the Roundup: I fixed Candy Crush… crap.  I AM ENROLLING IN HOGWARTS!  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between April 11th and April 18th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

Proving just how enormous and scattered the ALI blogosphere is, I had never heard of the Wiegands until they released the trailer for
American Blogger, though the wife of the filmmaker — Casey Wiegand — started her blog after her miscarriage.  The women in the film are all Casey’s friends from the blogosphere, but I don’t recognize any of them.

I am going to be completely mortified if one of you writes and tells me that you were in the film.  Actually, no wait, I’m not going to be mortified.  You’re bloggers.  I pay attention to your words, not what you look like.  Excluding the people I’ve already met, I can only identify a handful of you by sight if I bumped into you in the grocery store, and that’s with staring at your Facebook picture in my newsfeed.  Most people don’t look exactly like their picture anyway.

It works both ways: you likely wouldn’t be able to pick me out of a crowd.  I’ve only be recognized once.  And it was in an airport bathroom.  And it was only because the person had been reading Life from Scratch and had the book closed and facedown in her lap during the flight, so she was staring at my picture for awhile.  And then I was washing my hands in the same airport bathroom.  How trippy is that?

Do you guys know who is in this film?

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I have fallen deeply in love with Newman’s Own Cinnamon mints.  I’ll admit that I avoided buying them for years because the tin exclaims in bright red letters HOT.  And I wasn’t so into the idea of putting something in my mouth that visually proclaimed itself to be so spicy that it made tigers growl.  And then on a whim, I bought a box.  And ended up eating the whole thing in a few days.  And then purchasing two more boxes: one for the purse and one as a back-up.

They’re not that spicy.  They have a great taste of cinnamon.  They’re sort of like a red-hot without cringe-y ingredients like confectioner’s glaze (otherwise known as an excretion of the lac bug).  And they’re always now in my purse if you want one.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “Breathing Is Hard: Thoughts On Crying And Singing” (Schrodinger’s Catbox)
• “On Grief: The Quiet Moments” (My Cheap Version of Therapy)
• “Scars” (Sweetest in the Gale)
• “Late for the Party” (Mine to Command)
• “It’s a Hike” (Conceptionally Challenged)

Okay, now my choices this week.

An Engineer Becomes a Mom about releasing her anger.  It is an incredibly powerful post, and the author lets out a loud roar, especially to the people who make armchair judgments while her heart is in the middle of the fray.  “It’s hard to own up to this anger that as an adoptive parent.  We are supposed to say and do the right things, think child-centric, be compassionate to the parents, and sometimes to let ourselves get hurt during the process.  Because we do get hurt during the process.”  It’s a must-read.

A Half-Baked Life has a post about losing the house they were about to buy that reminded me of house hunting in the middle of treatments.  She draws her own analogy between miscarriages and buying a house, as well as pointing out the ways these two life experiences diverge.  It’s a great post, plus you get the villanelle “One Art” to boot.

Lastly, Silent Sorority has a post about the concept of “healing” and whether it’s an accurate term to ever use in regards to suffering.  She talks about a recent David Brooks piece, pointing out that “We’re reminded daily that it’s bad form to remain too long in a negative state. Society is uncomfortable — plain and simple — when the iconic happy face is not front and center.”  I absolutely love this line: “There’s nothing quite so dark as seeing yourself at your worst and then discovering your heart is blacker than you might have imagined.”

The roundup to the Roundup: Who is in American Blogger?  Love Newman’s Own Cinnamon mints.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between April 4th and April 11th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.