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Helpful Things To Say To Yourself

A few weeks ago… months ago?… Mari Andrews had an essay about anxiety, and it contained a few things she says to herself when she is panicking. They were so helpful and thought-provoking that I turned some into a virtual sticky note on my laptop.

The thoughts that resonated the most:

This thought is unpleasant, but it’s safe

Thinking about it more won’t bring relief

It could be true or not true

The other sayings were helpful, but these three stuck out to me because they are always true. Thoughts can be unpleasant, but a thought is not the same as something actively happening to me. Sometimes, ruminating on something can help me feel better when I’m actively problem-solving. Still, many times, I hit a point where continuing to think about something without having additional information is no longer bringing relief. And I always have to acknowledge that a thought I’m having has a chance of being true and a chance of being not true, no matter how sure I am in the moment that it is 100% factually true and a situation is likely to happen. Maybe it won’t.

Passing this essay along in case it help anyone else.

1 comment

1 a { 04.19.24 at 12:32 pm }

I only panic when I can’t find so.ething I really need right at that very moment. My anxiety is quieter – it’s waiting for a shoe to drop. I know it’s coming but I don’t know what it is or when it will happen. No way to get rid of that feeling, unfortunately. But it is not as disruptive as the kind of anxiety that interferes with living your life.

(c) 2006 Melissa S. Ford
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