#Microblog Monday 454: Short Term Reality With Long Term Optimism
Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is? Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.
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Not a secret that I have been struggling with the twins leaving. I write about it several times each week. This mental model gave me food for thought because I reject any messaging about how I should also focus on the good parts of an empty nest. That’s not where I am. And with this, I don’t have to feel optimistic in the short term. I can feel whatever I’m feeling in the short term with the idea that a future point will be different.
Dropping it here in case it is helpful for anyone else.
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3 comments
Instead of focusing on “good parts” for you (empty nest), what about focusing on the good parts for them?
Anticipation sucks. It means you’re living their loss even when they are still with you. Going through it twice, in some ways, but without the balance that you get when living it. So I like the acknowledgement that you can mourn what is changing for you, but at the same time know that you will be okay once you get through this really difficult time. So often, people stamp their feet and refuse to acknowledge they’ll ever be okay after change. Knowing that you will be is the key. And I’m really glad that you know that, because it will make it all a tiny bit easier.
Giving yourself permission to feel what you’re going to feel anyway, must be freeing. I hope there are glimmers in the transition, but if it doesn’t happen, there’s plenty of time (later!) to try to feel better.
Sending love.