Young Adults
The Wolvog went driving with Josh while ChickieNob and I went on an indoor walk in Helsinki. Afterward, he texted me a photo of the Wolvog filling my car with gasoline as proof that he had taken care of a task I asked him to do before he went out. Nothing more than shorthand for “check this off the to-do list.”
But that photo. The Wolvog’s hair tucked under a baseball cap; wild curls peeking out from a lack of haircut. Jeans and old t-shirt, half-smiling at the camera, proud of his self-sufficiency. So much taller than the roof of the car.
When I started this blog, the twins were about to turn two. We were transitioning from bottles.
Now they are teens, driving cars and having opinions and running errands. We don’t have kids anymore. We have young adults.
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I asked the Wolvog if I could write a post about the image. “Sure. But why?” It was bittersweet, I told him, and he asked me why again.
Because until you pay attention to someone aging, you don’t realize the weight of aging. When you’re aging yourself as a child or teen, you can’t see it. But when you hit adulthood and begin noticing it in others, aging stands out and you start seeing it everywhere: in the older generation, in the younger generation, in yourself. I am thrilled that the Wolvog is growing; I love the teen years. But it is bittersweet to see time passing.
8 comments
All the yeses to this post… I love my grownup/growing humans, but do feel some of the best years are in the past. Sitting with time in the pandemic has been a harsh lesson.
Thank you for allowing/realizing that your kids grow into young adults. Not all parents do that. <3
If I'd had children, I know I would always miss those silly toddler years and then those playful elementary school years. But every season of life has good parts to enjoy and celebrate! I'm glad you see this. <3
My oldest turned 10 this week and it feels old. In some ways I’m sad for the chubby cheeks and toddler giggles that are gone but I love the person she’s becoming. She’s funny and smart and so very kind. We can talk about books and friends and she still likes to hang out with me. It’s wild to realize how quickly it happens but how lucky we are to be a part of it.
Yess.
My twins (now age 9) are not as old as yours — I found your blog while still TTC, and you’d been writing for a while by then — but I am sometimes struck by how they are growing. Interestingly, one thing that sticks out to me was when they began reading chapter books independently. . . maybe because reading was such a huge part of my life as a child (and still is TBH), and knowing that they were now able to do it without my involvement served to highlight the fact that they are being exposed to ideas from sources other than just our home and their school.
When they turned 9 in January, I couldn’t help thinking of how, in 9 more years, they’d be turning 18 and (likely) preparing to leave our home. The 9 years they have been in our lives have gone by both agonizingly slowly at times and more quickly than it seems possible.
I feel so privileged to have seen – through your words here – Wolvog and Chickie Nob grow up. That they are driving blows my mind.
Bittersweet. I get it. I feel it (not to the same extent, of course) with my nieces and nephews and oldest great-nephew.
Yes. 😭😭😭time flies. My oldest is 10 and I keep thinking what happened to my little baby? Like Sharon I am always doing math—when she was 6 I thought “she’s already 1/3 thru her childhood.” Now at 10 it’s already half over 😭😭😭. It’s especially hard right now—working at home with distance learning—there’s a lot of tension and I’m not at my best. We’re getting extra time together but it’s not quality time at all. (Still worth it to keep my kids safe.) so I feel like time is precious and yet I’m wasting it.
Oooof, that is bittersweet. It’s not the same but my best friend’s kids are growing into teenagers and it seemed to happen overnight, and occasionally she sends me a picture and I’m like WHO IS THAT MAN CHILD??? So you think the pandemic made it hard to see in person until there was a still picture out in the world and then it was like BAM! He’s a young adult? I feel like time is moving differently and perception is shifted too in these strange times. Yay for young adults, and hugs for the littles they aren’t anymore. 💜
My baby is going to be taking driver’s ed in the fall. She’s taller than me. That just doesn’t seem right.