Cold Calling
There was an article going around a week or two ago that everyone was gushing about. It was a celebration of cold calling—picking up the phone and just calling a friend instead of setting up a time to chat. The idea is to reintroduce spontaneity into the experience, and to return to the delight of being surprised to find a friend on the other end of the line when you pick up.
Sort of like one of the things I miss: bumping into people you know when you’re out-and-about, running errands. I haven’t had a chance meeting in the library in over a year, and I do miss that.
But I don’t miss cold calling. I have recurring calls set up with friends, and I love it because I can plan for it. I’m in the right frame of mind when we start talking, not feeling torn between wanting to catch up and wanting to finish the task I was planning to do. One of my least favourite things is talking to someone when it’s clear that I don’t have their attention, so I never want to do that to someone else.
What do you think? Are you pro-spontaneous conversation or do you like to be texted first to make sure it’s a good time to talk?
7 comments
I’m pro-spontaneous conversation for me, but I don’t really call other people because I hate talking on the phone. I’m terrible.
I prefer sending a quick message to check if it’s a good time to talk. Also prefer if someone texts me first before calling. Most of the time, I have my phone silenced or I don’t have it near me, so unless I expect a call, I won’t be picking up.
Also, life is kind of hectic and it’s hard to have a good chat with a friend when I am pulled in 10 different directions by kids, or in the middle of baking, or frantically trying to finish up something for work. So no, spontaneous cold calls aren’t going to work too well in my case.
I like your idea of recurring phone dates… I’ll have to try it.
I’m with a, I hate talking on the phone. Spontaneous convo in the library: great. Random text message from a friend: great. Phone call: meh. I have so much respect for you that you’ve set up time to connect. That’s outside of my comfort zone!
I love getting a spontaneous call from a friend and fondly remember the days — mostly pre-kids — when these used to happen often. However, nowadays most of my friends are so busy with work, family and other things that a “cold call” to any of them would run a high probability of going to voicemail. (BTW, the same is true on my end: the odds of my being available to talk at a time a friend calls me are slim. I generally slip in my calls to friends and family when I’m out running errands, or on my almost-daily walk.)
Depends who it is from! I definitely prefer a text asking “are you free now?” rather than a cold call. I will confess that last week I got a cold call from someone I know (and love) and I didn’t pick up. I just wasn’t in the mood! It’s the same with spontaneous “chats” online. I’m fine if I can ignore it and respond when I am free/feel like it. I hate it if they have seen I’m online, and expect me to be available but I’m doing something important (like blogging, reading a blog, commenting on a blog post, etc)!
My sister cold calls me all the time. She’s my sister so she’s allowed! But she cold calls right when I’m making dinner, or we’re about to eat dinner. It’s infuriating. lol But I’m glad she calls.
I’ve gradually become someone now who won’t cold call. Probably later than most. I grew up before we even had caller ID. But now I’m one of those people that feels like I’m being rude if I just call somebody other than if it’s for work purposes.
(Since I’m working from home my number gets forwarded to my cell. So I have to answer every call and get a lot of Robo calls because you never know who’s calling when it’s a number I don’t know. And then meanwhile I never know who’s calling from work because a generic number shows up for our government agency it could be anything from an IT person to my actual boss. So I’m constantly answering my cell during the day 😬 so as not to jeopardize my working from home by somebody complaining that I wasn’t available)
And I have to say it does make one feel a bit worse today if you call call someone and they don’t answer. Because you know they can see who you are now and then perhaps are choosing not to pick up vs. not being near their phone.
I would much rather someone cold call me than not call at all! I’m generally not that busy (especially right now with covid around…) that I don’t have time to chat. If I don’t recognize a number, I generally don’t answer, but if they leave a message, I’ll usually call right back.
I got a call not too long ago out of the blue from my childhood best friend… we are not very good about keeping in touch these days, but whenever we do, we just pick up where we left off. And she’d emailed me to wish me a happy birthday and asked for my phone numbers — said she’d call me soon. I’d kind of forgotten about it, but the phone rang one Saturday night… I didn’t recognize the phone number but I did recognize the area code as the same as my parents & sister and my aunts, whose numbers I don’t know by heart but they do call me now & then. I thought it might be one of them. So I picked up and it was my friend, and what a lovely surprise. We talked for an hour & a half!