Memory Lane
I started getting emails on Friday about Vox, and Turia sent along an article about Heather Armstrong that contained a sentence about me in the middle. It sent me on a bizarre trip down memory lane, which had already started recently because some longtime DC bloggers formed a group on Facebook for a reunion of sorts.
The twins and I were reading through old posts on my blog, and I was trying to explain to them how different blogging was back then. It was a lot easier because everyone pretty much knew each other. It was rare for someone to say, “Did you see what so-and-so wrote?” and have no clue what so-and-so wrote. I would go to BlogHer and get to see everyone I conversed with on the Internet face-to-face. Now, it would be more likely that I’d find familiar faces in the larger crowd but not be familiar with most people in the room. Back then, I could write anyone with a question, even if we weren’t friends, because we all knew of each other even if we weren’t close with each other. It wasn’t six degrees of separation — at most it was one or two.
And a lot harder because it was all about writing, and if that wasn’t your medium, it was harder to connect with people. Social media has made it so longform writers and shortform writers, video creators, photographers, cartoonists… everyone has a way into the conversation. And the tools… well… frankly the tools were wonky and frustrating. Do you remember when my blogroll was on my sidebar, and it took two or three minutes for the webpage to load?
What I miss is how we used to gather together. The topic of blog carnivals came up recently, and I miss things like that; big internet projects that brought people together, such as IComLeavWe or the Virtual Lushary, but even more the events that crossed niche lines and brought the internet together like Delurking Week at the beginning of January.
I am still in touch with a large chunk of people from that era — many of us are still writing our blogs regularly — and the rest are on Facebook or email. But it’s different from that time when everyone would hang out on each other’s blogs, talking in the comment section, picking apart our lives or recording moments.
9 comments
I miss those early days of community.
Meeeeeee, too.
Yes to all of this!
“we all knew of each other even if we weren’t close with each other” — I miss this sense of neighborhood.
The Lushary!! The Lollipop Tree! The Creme! The BBBBrigade book club! The video festivals! All of these bring me such a sense of nostalgia.
I got a chuckle when I read that article & came to the line “Melissa Ford, who WROTE about IVF on her blog Stirrup Queens.” Ummm, hello, she’s still there!! lol
I got (& wrote about) a similar feeling recently… I’ve found a few (younger — in fact, young enough to be MY kids!! cough cough…) childless-not-by-choicers on Instagram & Twitter recently… they were talking about how much they love “this community” they’ve found… and I had never heard of any of them until a month or so ago. And I got the feeling they hadn’t heard of me, or you — or Pamela at Silent Sorority, or Jody Day at Gateway Women, or Lisa at Life Without Baby, or Mali at No Kidding in NZ or any of the other women who are my personal CNBC/ALI peers & gurus. Part of me felt a little miffed (lol) — but I realized that ultimately, it’s a good thing. It means there are more of us out there, speaking out & finding our tribe, even if it’s not on blogs anymore.
https://theroadlesstravelledlb.blogspot.com/2019/03/so-why-arent-there-more-of-us-part-2.html
But yeah, I miss the camaraderie of those days. Meet you in the Lushary? 😉
I miss those days too, and value the community I had when I needed it so so badly. Thank you for bringing us all together. I feel that today the internet (social media) has brought everyone close together (info at your finger tips, so much info!) yet further apart (so many people!). I love that you continue to blog and that I can stop in when I need to.
I miss those days too!
Those were the days 🙂 . It’s certainly a different landscape now.
Some of my former community and I were speaking of this very thing a few days ago.
I think it’s inevitable that things change. I go back to the days of message boards, which is how I processed my infertility and early childlessness. None of the people I met there are working on that message board any more. But we were there for over ten years, which is a lot! It was leaving that environment that encouraged me to start my No Kidding blog, but it was obvious even then (nine years ago now) that it was an established community.
I thought this quote from the article quoting a Washington Post article was a bit sad though –
” … we’ve lost a source of support and community, a place to share vulnerability and find like-minded women, and a forum for female expertise and wisdom.”
Yes, perhaps on the grand scale. Now it’s all about image. What I like though is that, even if blogging isn’t the big business it was, it can still provide community, though in smaller doses. And we have to look harder to find them. But in places like yours and the blogs of all your commenters and others, we can still find that support and wisdom and love. And that’s important.