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Yes, the Virtual Lushary has creaked open its doors and the bartender is ready to pour you figurative drinks.

The doors were actually opened by Loribeth who said, “Mel, we need a Lushary.”  Which is why I’m raising up this first beer (normally, I like a Grolsch, but since it’s almost St. Patrick’s Day, I took some of the Guinness on tap) to Loribeth and offering up a toast.

To Loribeth, who has been a friend for about six years. (I literally can’t remember when we first started reading each other, but Gmail spat out back and forth emails from 2007 when I did a search.)  Who once sent me a Jewish calendar that I loved so much that I left it unused so it wouldn’t have markings in it.  Who brilliantly deconstructs news stories.  She’s a wonderful, kind-hearted, lovely, smart person, and I’m lucky that she decided to start a blog and put her story online, inviting us to all know her daughter, Katie, who she lost many years ago.

I’m imagining at this point that you’re all raising your glasses with me and calling out, “to Loribeth!”

So take a moment to offer up your own toast to another blogger, a shout out telling us why you love them.  And as I’m pouring you a drink, fill us in on what has happened in your life this past month.

It has been awhile since we met, bitched, cried, comforted, and caught up each other on our cycles and lives. Pull up a seat and I’ll pour you a drink. Let everyone know what is happening in your life. The good, the bad, the ugly. My only request is that if a story catches your eye, you follow it back to the person’s blog and start reading their posts. Give some love, give some support, or laugh with someone until your drink comes out of your nose.

I have a ton of assvice in my back pocket and as a virtual bartender, I will give it to you unless you specifically tell me that this is simply a vent and you do not want to receive anything more than a hug.

So if you have been a lurker for a while (or if this is your first open bar), sit down and tell us about yourself. Remember to provide a link or a way for people to continue reading your story (or if you don’t have a blog — gasp! — you can always leave an email address if you’re looking for advice or support. If not, people can leave messages for that person here in the comments section too). If you’re a regular at the bar, I’ll get out your engraved martini glass while you make yourself comfortable. And anyone new, welcome. I’m glad you found this virtual bar.

For those who have no clue what I’m talking about when I say that the bar is open, click here to catch up and then jump into the conversation back on this current post.

So have an imaginary cocktail and tell us what is up with your life.


1 EmHart { 03.15.12 at 8:04 am }

I would like to pull up a stool at the bar please, its a little early for alcohol but I am going to go for a margarita anyway, because I can and because I love them.

We recently had a MFI diagnosis and wont even see out consultant for an initial meeting until the end of March, so I am just sitting here twiddling my thumbs.

In one way that sucks, nothing is happening or likely to for months, but in another way, its kind of ok. This last month, since we found out what was wrong is the first time in ages I have felt like myself and not some obsessive, emotional mess. I have a sneaky suspicious once we begin treatment I will be right back there analyzing every twinge, but until then I am going with the calm, slightly dull nothingness.

Thinking of that margarita has made me crave a huge filled taco. Does this bar serve food too?

2 EmHart { 03.15.12 at 8:05 am }

Oh, and you can find me at my blog here: http://followeveryrainbow-emhart.blogspot.com/

3 EmHart { 03.15.12 at 8:36 am }

Oh, can I add please a toast. I would like to raise a glass to Belle at http://scrambled-eggs.org/ The March Photo Challenge she set up has kept me human while I wait for what happens next. It is so great to have a focus every day, so many photos have ended up prompting that days blog post. So thank you Belle, cheers, and have a drink on me.

4 April { 03.15.12 at 8:44 am }

I’d love a glass of Reissling, what ever kind you have and I toast Heather from http://www.thehopefulelephant.com/. She is smart, funny, and one of the nicest people I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting. She has been a source of comfort, humor, and when I needed it, a kick in the ass. So here’s to Heather!

As for what’s going on in my life, we’re remodelling our kitchen and eating so much take out it’s scary. The kitchen remodel has also spurred spring cleaning so I’m cleaning the rest of the house because the kitchen is out of my control. We start back to the RE next month and have to start from the beginning again. It’s disheartening, but if that’s what we need to do, then that’s what’s we’ll do.

5 Her Royal Fabulousness { 03.15.12 at 8:51 am }

I would like to raise a glass to 2 different bloggers: Mo at http://lifeandloveinthepetridish.blogspot.com/ and Jen at http://violettamargarita.blogspot.com/. Both of these ladies are pregnant right now after multiple IVFs and many years of IF. They are providing a lot of hope for me right now. Jen even lives a town over from me, and we are planning to meet sometime soon!

As for me, I begin Lupron for IVF #2 next week after a disastrous IVF #1. I am really ready to begin again, but I have to say, I am having extreme difficulty being positive. Even though there are lots of us who needed more than one IVF to get pregnant, I can’t seem to find anyone else to talk to who had zero fertilization, then went on to have a baby. I feel really alone with this aspect of our process.

So to ease the pain, here is a bloody mary!

6 serenity { 03.15.12 at 8:52 am }

I’ll have a drink, please! I’m craving mojitos lately so one of those would be fabulous. Something about the coming of spring and longer daylight in the afternoons. Yum.

I am in the midst of CHOOSING happiness; really working to notice when I’m angry or tired and figuring out how to switch my perspective a bit. I’ve spent far too much energy lately feeling angry and tired, and I’m ready to change that up a bit.

Because, well, we’re going to cycle again this spring sometime with New RE, we think. IVF #6. #3 since we had Lucky. And as much as I long to be done with treatments, I long to complete our family more.

I think, anyway.

Follow up with New RE isn’t until the end of April so I still have time to change my mind. 🙂

My toast, today, is to Jjiraffe at Too Many Fish To Fry (http://jjiraffe.wordpress.com/). I just recently discovered her, and I love how balanced and thoughtful she is with issues that are prickly. And she’s funny and kind, too.

And her DAD reads her blog. And comments, and tells her that she’s awesome. I love him, too.

Anyway. It’s not much of a toast, but it is early and I’m drinking mojitos. 🙂

7 LostinLimbo { 03.15.12 at 9:11 am }

Raising a frosty glass of Bahama Mama (with pineapple garnish and umbrella, of course) to *for we are bound by symmetry* [http://unaffectedbyyou.blogspot.com] for her unflinching writing about not just the horrific physical and mental impact of loss and unexplained IF, but the way it wrecks your relationships, your sense of self-worth, and oozes into every crevice of your life.

Her most recent post, “I should have known” totally spoke to me – how your life is marked with out-of-nowhere breakdowns in restaurants (mine was in a Publix yesterday) because the crushing weight of this means you can crumble anywhere, anytime.

After being summarily rejected by all adoption agencies in our state for being either out of their service area, or mostly because we’re heathen, we’re trying one more time after 3 consecutive early losses. This is a hail mary attempt with a kitchen sink approach – acupuncture, hypnotherapy, nutrition, Metanx/Folgard, and in the meantime waiting on repeat blood results at a different reference lab, which may lead to heparin.

Every day I seriously doubt my ability to stay sane in this process. I’m tired of the bloodwork, and the pills, and the RE visits with no answers (but LOVE my dr!) because we don’t have anything wrong with us, tired of the waiting and the back-and-forth, tired of the process, of peeing on sticks and counting cycle days, tired of not knowing if my life, and my self, and my marriage can survive this or what comes next. I just want to be done.

I don’t blog because it seems exhausting to chronicle what’s in my head and then be worried about how it sounds in the world. But writing this has helped me frame where I am in this process, and I am so thankful to be able to read all of the amazing blogs out there, SQ at the top of this list!

8 Tiara { 03.15.12 at 9:36 am }

Firstly, I’m not sure if this pun was intentional or just a typo but when I read: “I have a ton of assvice in my back pocket” My milk almost came out my nose, lol! I love me a good pun, intentional or not!

I’d like to toast http://singulardesire.blogspot.com who has recently returned to blogging after a hiatus to regroup. She miscarried & lost her mother very closely together. I admire her fortitude & am glad she’s back.

So Mel, please pour me a Guiness in honur of St. Patty’s & cheers to you all!

9 loribeth { 03.15.12 at 10:04 am }

Well, I am speechless. And blushing. I wasn’t surprised to see The Lushary pop up since I did hint (OK, beg, lol) for it (I figured we all needed a good stiff drink after the events of last week), but thank you, Mel, for those very kind words. I think my very first delurking comment here (pre-dating my blog, which you encouraged me to start) may actually have been on a Lushary post — so the Lushary definitely holds a fond place in my heart. (Who wouldn’t love a bar where the company is so great, the drinks flow freely and you never get a hangover?)

I am not big on beer, but since it is St. Pat’s coming up, I will have some Bailey’s Irish cream on the rocks. ; ) There are so many wonderful bloggers out there I would love to raise a glass to (yourself included, Mel!). Today, I am going to offer up a toast to Mali, who not only has a couple of great blogs (including No Kidding in NZ at but always leaves the best, most thoughtful comments. I have been reading the Healing Salon posts & attempting to comment on at least some of them — she has left comments on almost every one of them I’ve read, and she has been a great voice for the childless/free viewpoint in this community. Cheers, Mali — you mentioned in one of your comments that we should be having the Healing Salon chats on a patio somewhere with a glass of wine — so come join me out on the Lushary patio. ; )

10 mrsgreengrass { 03.15.12 at 10:16 am }

Introducing Myself:
In a nutshell, I am a high school English teacher and the chair of our department with 7 years experience who got pink-slipped this week. Yes, I’ll probably still have a job, but I’m pissed at the situation. I’m starting IVF this month at the exact same time as all of this drama. Consult next week. We’ve been TTC for 20 months now. I’m 31, he’s 42. Slight issues on both sides, but nothing major to point to.

Blogging is seriously changing my life in the best way. It’s therapy. It’s support. It’s a creative outlet.

So pour me a glass of some really complex dry red wine…and then come over and read. Baby-Making Merry-Go-Round.

I’ll send out my toast in a minute…

11 mrsgreengrass { 03.15.12 at 10:23 am }

I’d like toast Lindsey at Tiny Bits of Hope http://landpbabyjourney.blogspot.com/.
She’s a fellow teacher who is having a tough week.

12 Flmgodog { 03.15.12 at 11:22 am }

Ahhh, the Lushary. I have had so many drinks here over the years. I always feel like I am drinking on the patio or in the back of the bar “with my girls” when I am here. Mel, I’ll take something fruity and LARGE. After all the years my journey to parenthood is OVER (says a silent prayer of thanks). I know their are still so many of you all that are waiting…it’s hard.
I have a ton of woman I would like to toast but
I am giving my toast to Misfit (http://misfitmrs.blogspot.com/)
She is currently pregnant after seven losses. Things seem to be going well but you just never know what’s in store with RPL. I can relate to all she has been through.

13 Suzy { 03.15.12 at 11:29 am }

I’m pulling up a chair and having a seat while reading everyone’s toasts. Can someone make me a pom-tini?

Life in our house right now is tough. After another donor sperm IUI failed last week, we made the decision to stop pursuing treatments and look into adoption. Let’s just say I may have had one or two pom-tini’s in the past week. It’s been tough right now.

But I’m raising my glass and toasting the always lovely JJ at Reproductive Jeans http://reproductive-jeans.com/ . She’s been through so much the past few years, and yet she ALWAYS is a huge support to others.

She’s been on a blogging break, but I think she might be coming back again. 🙂


14 a { 03.15.12 at 11:30 am }

To St. Elsewhere (http://saintaltrove.blogspot.com/) and J W Moxie (http://thesmartness.com/) who always respond to comments – I admire your dedication!

To Mina (http://kmina.wordpress.com/), who harasses me to post.

To Mel, Lori (http://writemindopenheart.com/), May (http://nutsinmay.wordpress.com/), and Eden (http://www.edenriley.com/), who don’t mind when I send them random things from the internet that amuse me and make me think of them.

I’m drinking Mountain Dew right now. I think I’ll stick with that, since I need the caffeine.

15 Denver Laura { 03.15.12 at 11:34 am }

I’d like to raise my glass to toast Lori at http://writemindopenheart.com/. She’s opened my eyes to open adoption and always has something positive to say. Cheers!

16 Peg { 03.15.12 at 11:55 am }

I am pulling an imaginary Guinness from the tap as well with a nice, thick foamy top.

My shout outs go actually to four people who have consistently posted on my blog giving me love, support and sound advice when needed. They are Rach at http://hannahandlily.blogspot.com/

Becky at http://lessonsfromaninfertilesocialworker.blogspot.com/

Kiran at http://masalachica.com/ AND

Korinthia at http://blogs.babble.com/babble-voices/holding-down-the-fort/

Their blogs always make me laugh, think and pause to remember the good in this world and the simple joys in family. Please check them out and be equally inspired.

This month (Feb/March) has been both light and dark. We’ve celebrated birthdays with a vengeance. We’ve enjoyed lots of fun sports (swimming, cheearleading, basketball and soccer). We’ve definitely enjoyed all the great weather. Personnally, though, I’ve found myself stuck in the dark. I’m starting to try to deal with my grief. I’ve struggled with worry about my little nieces living with my sister. This has resulted in strain within all the relationships in my family and we continue to question our decisions. The kids have all had desperate needs for attention which keep me up with worry at night and drain me physically and mentally throughout the day. My husband and I continue to struggle through this new life and I often feel so alone. Sigh.

Cheers to everyone who faces life challenges but continue to move forward with love and joy! Thank Melissa for opening the bar at just the right time. The Guiness is sliding down very nicely 🙂

17 Cristy { 03.15.12 at 12:07 pm }

I’m pulling up a stool, ordering a porter and raising my glass to two different bloggers: Jay at http://the2weekwait.blogspot.com/ and MissC at http://missconception-ads.blogspot.com/. Jay’s blog was the first one I found and she helped me see that even in the darkest hours, there can be hope and humor. I treasure our friendship. MissC honesty surrounding infant loss and life after has shown me how important it is to remember your babies and live your life well. It was because of her posts that I had the courage to openly mourn the loss of my pregnancy, which has allowed for me to heal.

As for me, I just had my transfer for FET #1 and am currently at the beginning of the 2WW. Seeing the image of my two snowbabies has given me so much hope and I’ve been spending each moment sending them love in hopes that one of them will decide to implant. How I hope.

Cheers everyone!

18 Jendeis { 03.15.12 at 12:24 pm }

To Mel, JW Moxie and all those who commented on my most recent posts. Thanks for encouraging me to start posting again!

Still chugging along on Weight Watchers and getting ready to start TTC version 2.0.

19 Jendeis { 03.15.12 at 12:26 pm }

Oh, and since we all know what a lightweight I am (at drinking, that is) gimme a milk. Chocolate.

20 Tigger { 03.15.12 at 12:41 pm }

The Lushary! I’ve missed it so!

My shout-out goes to Jess (http://theproblemwithhope.blogspot.com/?zx=7b9528399eac0cb9) (password protected), because she’s been there for me consistently for a long time. If it hadn’t been for her comments, and knowing someone was reading me, I might have given up blogging a long time ago.

I’d also like to send one out to April (http://aprilvak.wordpress.com/) who is relatively new to the scene but always writes from the heart. I love to read her posts!

As for us – Cole’s first birthday is coming up on April 4th! His surgery is scheduled for May 17th and I’m terrified. If anyone has any suggestions for weaning a child who loves his bottle so much that he’ll walk around with an empty one, I’d appreciate it. I have a little over a month to do it and he’s refusing!

21 LMM { 03.15.12 at 1:17 pm }

Please mix me up a sidecar and allow me to toast Julia at Here be Hippogriffs. Love her and her blog.

22 marwil { 03.15.12 at 1:40 pm }

I’ll have a nice cold glass of rose wine please. And I toast to lovely Miss Skytimes over at http://myskytimes.wordpress.com/ for being the bestest choco buddy (http://mommyodyssey.com/chocobuddy/) sending me chocolate packages when I need it the most.

Also, a toast to spring, a warming sun and new hope!

Were I’m at? learning to live life again after loss and stillbirth.

23 It Is What It Is { 03.15.12 at 2:08 pm }

Gosh, I read this and thought, gee I wish I had the time to saddle up to the bar and leave a comment. Then I popped over to Taking the Statistical Bullet’s entry, “This Can’t Be It”, http://takingthestatisticalbullet.blogspot.com/2012/03/this-cant-be-it.html, and my HEART STOPPED.

PLEASE, if you are reading this, go over to her blog and send prayers, love, support to Katie and her dear friend who is literally FIGHTING FOR HER LIFE.

As for me, I am having surgery tomorrow to remove to aspirate two cysts, have a hysteroscopy, and an endometrial biopsy in preparation for my final FET with donated embryos.

I’ll have a Cadillac margarita on the rocks, no salt, and make it a double.

24 Jessica { 03.15.12 at 2:36 pm }

This is my first Lushary! What a neat idea! I do not have any particular blog to toast but would like to toast to this whole blogging community. It has been such a great resource and place of comfort for me. So a big thanks to everyone out there!

The last month or so has consisted of my husband and I ttc again. Our daughter was stillborn almost a year ago and we are ready to make the attempt again. After meeting with a new OB/GYN about 6 weeks ago I have just been charting and testing. I meet with her again early april to try the clomid route again. But I love hearing everyone else’s stories! This is my blog just in case anyone is interested 🙂

25 Sharon { 03.15.12 at 2:40 pm }

A margarita would be really great! 🙂

I’ll raise my glass to Jay at Stuck in a Baby Drought (http://babydrought.blogspot.com/). We met via our blogs and then learned that we live less than ten minutes from one another and have lots in common. We are now “real life” friends in addition to being blogger friends.

We even cycled with donor eggs at the same clinic, and it has been really fun having her friendship during my pregnancy and hers. (Her baby is due exactly 15 weeks after mine.) She attended my baby shower, and I will be attending hers in a few weeks!

26 HereWeGoAJen { 03.15.12 at 2:46 pm }

My toast is to Maria, who has been around about as long as I have, and who is always there for me, even when where we both are are not the same place. She’s not ALI blogging right now, but I love her.

I’ll have something pink and fancy to drink. It’s not my favorite week this week. I’m in the week after my son died last year, but before I found out.

27 Lori Lavender Luz { 03.15.12 at 3:08 pm }

OK. I’m crying. But not so hard that I’m dribbling out any of my mojito.

I was going to start by toasting Loribeth with you. I am honored to share a name with such a wise gentle reader/writer.

I was also going to name some of the bloggers I adore:

local gals http://geo-chick.blogspot.com and http://fertilityalphabetsoup.wordpress.com

But I am emotional because of some drama surrounding the book I’m writing. So when I saw that A and Denver Laura had mentioned me, I burst. In a good way.

I may have to come back again with others as I remember them.

And now this comment will surely get caught in your canned-meat filter.

28 Mina { 03.15.12 at 3:27 pm }

Oh, good grief, someone finally read my mind! Thank you, Loribeth! And Mel! Here is to you – erm, let’s make it a nice round of Cuba Libre for everyone. For starters.

Now, please join me in harrasing A (http://areyoukiddingme.blogspot.com) to post. Hold her caffeine and give her a Glenfiddich, maybe she’ll be more malleable. 🙂

We’ve got Jen at http://twasbriligandtheslithytoves.blogspot.com/ who’s got such great betas, and we’re hoping the same for Jo at http://jo-mojoworking.blogspot.com/. And to St. Elsie (http://saintaltrove.blogspot.com/) who is getting her patience tested – two shots of vodka. 🙂

And last but not least this round, to the scientists who found out that the male Drosophila Melanogaster (the vinegar fly) when it gets rejected by the female, drowns its sorrows in alcohol. Now this is news, ladies! The vinegar fly falls off the wagon…

29 Jen { 03.15.12 at 3:30 pm }

This is coming at a great time, Mel. I would love a gluten-free beer. Well I would REALLY love a regular beer, but alas. Gluten-free it is.

I’m new to the blog world of IF, been trying to conceive for about 10 months. My ovaries are bum. Sometimes I can handle it and sometimes I can’t. Lately it’s been the latter.

I have to say, thought, the blogs have helped. My own venting on my blog has helped and knowing I’m not alone has helped. This is a crappy club to be a member of, but I’m glad I’ve at least been able to find some other people in the club.

Thanks for the drink!

30 Sarah { 03.15.12 at 3:54 pm }

I would love myself some vanilla vodka and sprite please….And now that I’ve been served I’d like to raise my glass to Jess over at http://alittleblogaboutthebiginfertility.wordpress.com/ She has been waiting a long time for her miracle and has been through so much. She is now weeks away from having her miracle arrive and come home to her via adoption. Jess is one of the first blogs I started following and her perseverance has been an inspiration to me and many others. I appreciate her sharing her story.

31 Dora { 03.15.12 at 4:39 pm }

A toast to you, dear Mel. Hmmmm, Baileys and soda on the rocks sounds good. You know, I’m not much for guilt, but I’ve felt guilt about not commenting on all that’s gone on recently. I plead all the things you mentioned about why bloggers parenting after infertility don’t blog as much or comment as much. Too busy and chronically sleep deprived. I have been wanting to write my own post, but realistically, who knows when I’ll manage it. In spare moments, I try to catch up on my friends’ blogs. I really have too much to say to squish it in here, so in quick points, I’m finally a mother, but I will always be infertile, you ROCK, I love you, I’m sorry this hurt you, particularly during a difficult time of year for you. I read one post someone else wrote talking about their disillusionment with the leaders of our community. Mel, I think of you as a community organizer rather than leader. The blogosphere doesn’t have the hierarchy of the rest of the world. We can all do and say what we want on our blogs. This community is self defined. I’m infertile, parenting a child created in a lab in the midwest 4 years before she was transferred to my uterus in Toronto. This community is where I will always feel at home and most welcome.

Ack, that was terribly disjointed. I’ve caught another cold from the toddler and am not completely coherent. Mwah!

32 Mali { 03.15.12 at 6:13 pm }

Ooh, Mel (and Loribeth you genius!) great idea, I really needed this. I’ll have a nice big glass of good chardonnay and sit on the patio with you all. The last week I’ve been dealing with pain – so last night, my traditional summer Thursday night pasta and chardonnay night when my husband is at golf, I couldn’t even have chardonnay due to medication I’ve been on. You can’t believe what a sacrifice that was!! I’ve not posted about it, because it feels like being sorry for myself. But I might.

Loribeth – I can’t believe you toasted me (thanks so much), and because others have toasted you (and you know I would anyway), I’m also going to toast Pamela, at a Silent Sorority (http://blog.silentsorority.com/), hosting one of the Salons at Coming to Terms (http://www.coming2terms.com/). She’s one of the first IF/no kidding bloggers I found when I ventured out into this space, her book was one of the first I read, and she is always so thoughtful, so balanced, so intelligent about what and how she writes she is a blessing to this community.

33 Trisha { 03.15.12 at 6:40 pm }

To Katie @ http://thecornfedfeminist.blogspot.com who got her BFP a couple of weeks ago just after the death of her grandfather.

To Robin @ http://polycysticinside.wordpress.com who just got to see her twins at her 8 wk OB visit. Apple and Banana are looking good!

and to Tami @http://submerged.blogspot.com who is trying to figure out some things and doing a natural cycle this month. She can always make me smile with her comments!

34 vablondie { 03.15.12 at 7:47 pm }

Hooray for the Lushary! I have been a terrible commenter, as always. But I am still here.
I have had a bit of a breakdown, and I am currently dealing with depression. Thank goodness for medication! Apparently the stress of taking care of a very active toddler, looking for a new job, and looking for a new house were too much for me to handle. So I slipped into depression.
And any thought about trying again for a second child is on hold. I am trying to loose weight, but it is slow coming off, which is frustrating.
Overall, I am trying to find my way back to happiness. It is a start.

35 vablondie { 03.15.12 at 7:58 pm }

Oh, and I would like to toast Mrs. Spit, who just got a really, really cool new car! http://mrsspit.ca/?p=3320

36 Daryl { 03.15.12 at 8:23 pm }

My first time at the Lushary, so cheers, everyone! I’m raising my frozen margarita to Kimberly at If You Don’t Stand For Something (almostbatten.blogspot.com/) who’s heading out of town with her husband next week for their first appointment with a urolgist. And to playitallnightlong (playitallnightlong.wordpress.com) who’s getting over a cancelled IVF cycle and psyching herself up for another try.

As for me? Still in limbo with my husband’s treatments and waiting until next month for a repeat SA.

37 Rachel { 03.15.12 at 8:24 pm }

As the artist formerly known as eggs in a row, I’d like that thank EVERYONE that has reached out to me. It’s been really a terrible week, but as I open my emails, and find your love, it’s much improved!

I wanna toast C at the Port…she has a gorgeous new baby AND I get to visit her this weekend!


38 Rachel { 03.15.12 at 8:24 pm }

Oh, and make it a Pinot Grigio, please, and don’t be stingy!

39 Lori Lavender Luz { 03.15.12 at 8:53 pm }
40 mrs spock { 03.15.12 at 9:49 pm }

I’d like to toast Tigger (http://atiggerslife.wordpress.com/). Even though I don’t haunt blogs very much anymore, I am on Facebook a lot and she always comments on my posts! It helps me still feel a little connected to the ALI blogosphere even though I’ve had to have stronger boundaries on my time.

I’ll take a tea, earl grey, hot- real cream and honey. Not a drinker here. The mister and I are almost hitting 100% capacity. In the past 4 weeks, he and both kids had the GI virus from Hades, then he and I had round 2, and now our son is home with a fever for days. We’re almost out of time off, and I need to have a tooth pulled and a new one implanted, and have needed an EGD and ultrasound from the GI this month as well. My arthritis NSAIDs are killing my stomach, I can’t take them, and my bones are rusty and painful. These children were worth the fight, but the life force has practically been sucked out of my body. And a date- haven’t had one in a long time.

41 Dora { 03.15.12 at 9:50 pm }

Love you, too, Lori! Mmmmm, I’ll have a mojito, too. Who says we can’t come back for a second drink? Sunshine has been CRAZY in the evenings this week. Meltdown city! I could use a mojito about now. Make mine with vodka instead of rum, and extra mint.

42 Blanche { 03.15.12 at 10:45 pm }

I spent the morning with a thankfully mostly-agreeable 20 month old traveling between DH’s doctors office, and the pharmacy, and work in an ultimately successful but highly frustrating attempt to get in-hand the multiple medications he needs to function thanks to narcolepsy. It wore me out! (The back story is we changed insurance so everything needs to be reapproved and that process is moving as slowly as an ice cube melting at the north pole.)

With the glorious weather we’ve been having I’m in the mood for something sweet and subtle that will sneak up on me before I know it – rum punch!

I’m raising a toast to VaBlondie @ http://vablondie.wordpress.com/ and Mic @ . Cheers to two women who are stronger than they think they are!

43 Shadow of My Former Self { 03.15.12 at 11:18 pm }

*hears the party noises, opens the door, looks round and plops herself on a stool*

I’ll take a greyhound (and with thanks, hands Tiara at http://join-tiaras-world.blogspot.com/ a napkin for her nose)!

I would like to toast the room. Had it not been for the kindness, understanding and support I’ve found in this community, I seriously doubt I would be here now (as in locked facilities rarely let patients out for toddies with the gang).

Happy spring everyone!

44 Justine { 03.16.12 at 9:54 am }

I’ll take a mojito, please. I interviewed for a job this week and they canceled the interview half way through due to some unelaborated-on emergency, telling me they’d reschedule. Given my current identity crisis, I’m feeling like I really don’t know which end is up any more.

I’d like to toast Keiko, whose Infertility Voice is an awesome new venue for one awesome woman. I wish I were as brave as she is. Maybe I can work up to it.

45 unaffected { 03.16.12 at 10:36 am }

Love this idea! This is my first visit to the Lushary, and I’m loving the ambiance! Now if only that bartender could bring me some more champagne…

There are so many women I’d like to toast to, and choosing one is difficult. But, I raise my glass (and ask you to do the same) to Anna at Supposed to Be My Symphony (http://supposedtobemysymphony.wordpress.com/). In September of 2011, she lost her sweet son at 22 weeks due to her developing severe preemclampsia. She writes what she feels, and it is at times raw, tear-inducing, heart-wrenching, and above all: real.

As far as what is happening in my life… After finally getting pregnant in November of 2011 after my first IVF cycle, we lost our little girl at 9 weeks due to Turner Syndrome/Monosomy X. It was a rough start to the new year (ok, understatement of the day). This past Wednesday, I was given the green light to proceed with my next FET, which will hopefully be taking place at the end of March. We have three frozen embryos, and will be transferring one at a time (clinical trial protocol).

Finally, I would like to thank LostinLimbo for her sweet toast to me. It brought tears to my eyes. Thank you, LiL, for your support. <3

46 Pamela Tsigdinos { 03.16.12 at 10:57 am }

Thanks, Mali and LoriLavenderLuz! In addition to toasting you right back. Is it too early to start drinking (wait, scratch that, we are coming up on St. Patrick’s Day weekend!), I’d like to toast two bloggers I’ve met overseas in real life the past few months — Klara in Slovenia (http://thenext15000days.blogspot.com/) and ShiftyShadow in Australia (http://shiftyshadow.blogspot.com/). They are kindred spirits — two of the most thoughtful and delightful women walking this planet!

47 Erica { 03.16.12 at 1:09 pm }

I’m late, but I’ll take a gin and tonic, followed by a Guinness. It’s been that kind of week. My husband’s well-deserved spring break was derailed by a rotator cuff injury, my brother and SIL just found out that their IVF try failed and if they want to try again they have to start from scratch, and a good friend of ours didn’t get tenure, which means he & his partner, our closest friends in town, will be leaving in about a year. Also, it’s sleeting. I like snow, and I can appreciate rain, but make up your mind, weather. Make up your mind!

But I’d like to toast Catherine W, of Between the Snow and the Huge Roses (http://betweenthesnowandthehugeroses.blogspot.com/), who is braver and funnier and more passionate than she thinks she is, who has a gift for bringing the sublime and the ridiculous together in profound and special ways, and who is a gifted and giving blog commenter as well. Cheers!

48 Shana { 03.16.12 at 3:21 pm }

I’d love a Bailey’s Irish Cream and toast Zioe at http://touchstonez.com/ who always includes her stillborn daughter in her touching and adorable Letters to Littles.

This week I am just trying to prepare mentally, emotionally, and logistically for travelling to California and staying with my mother for my father’s stone unveiling. I’ll be travelling a long distance by car for the first time with a baby who hates his carseat, dealing with my judgey mcjudgersons mother and sister, and visting my father’s final resting place for the first time since his funeral. ( Meditataing on getting to my happy place… I accept, I accept, I accept…)

49 Jo { 03.16.12 at 5:29 pm }

I need something strong, Mel. Today — I really don’t care what it is. Our final fet is a bust, I’m afraid, but since I can’t drink for real until Monday, a few virtual shots will have to do.

I want to toast the misfit http://justbeinginfertile.blogspot.com who always leaves such thoughtful comments and makes me feel HEARD, and stinkbomb at
http://stink-bomb.blogspot.com who is one of just a handful of bloggers who has been at this longer than I have.

I wish miracles for us all.


50 Emily { 03.17.12 at 11:32 am }

LOL I wrote about how this community is like Cheers during my first IUI. http://ablanket2keep.blogspot.com/2012/01/thought-vomit-thursday.html
I absolutely love that show. I have been watching it from the beginning to keep me relaxed and laughing through my cycles. I am currently in my 3rd IUI 2WW and I have been craving an ice cold Yuengling!

*Raises a frosty mug of beer* A toast to Belle @http://scrambled-eggs.org/ Without her March Photo Challenge I would probably be going crazy. Thank you for something to keep my mind off IF! Cheers!

(c) 2006 Melissa S. Ford
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