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Little Bites 6

We went to see African Cats in the theater.  The twins have only seen one movie in a regular theater, which was PonyoPonyo didn’t go as well as we hoped, and they’ve balked at seeing another film.  We do belong to a weekly children’s film series which plays in a theater, but kids talk through the film and walk around.  This was our second foray into a normal theater at a normal time with normal expectations.

The twins were doing fairly well until midway through the film when the ChickieNob suddenly said in way too loud a voice, “heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey, wait a second, how are the baby lions getting into the mommy lions if there’s no fertility doctor to put them in?”

I quickly whispered that there were other ways to make babies, and I’d explain all of it to her at home if she could hold off for a few hours.  Thankfully, she forgot by the time we left the theater.  But I’m just waiting for the thought to return…


The Wolvog got very upset when Layla went to die.  He cried bitterly, staring at the screen in disbelief.  At the end of the film, I rubbed his back and said, “that was really hard, watching Layla die.”

“She didn’t die,” the Wolvog told me, incredulously.  “She just went somewhere very far away.  And she is very happy there.  Very very happy.”

Not that he’s in denial or anything.


We had a nine hour drive a few weeks ago.  As we neared home, American Idiot popped into the CD player and I made my move to mute out the curse words.  Except instead of turning down the song on the fourth line, in my exhaustion I turned the dial in the wrong direction, causing the kids to hear, “the subliminal mindFUCK AMERICA!”

In the silence that followed, the Wolvog quietly said, “I can forget a curse word in a second.”

So there went several years of hard muting work down the drain.


I have not been able to find any other takers to join me in a skateboarding class.


At my guitar lesson this week, my teacher asked me if I wanted to try the song I was learning on an electric guitar instead of my acoustic.  He grabbed a standard Fender Squier off the wall (explaining that even I could not break this thing, the Volvo of guitars) and plugged it in.

And it was quite literally the most exciting thing that has happened to me in a long time.  I mean, I sucked hardcore playing it, and I desperately wished I could have an hour or two alone with it in order to try out different songs and fiddle with all the dials (there were just so many things to touch and push and spin).  But I felt so damn cool.


I had a long break from gum — like a ten year sojourn from gum.  While my brother was recently visiting, he opened a pack of Wrigley’s Extra Dessert Delights mint chocolate chip gum.  I know — I threw up in my mouth too.  And after several minutes of discussion, I agreed to try the gum before I continued to mock it.  And it turned out to be not-that-bad.

And by not-that-bad, I mean that I engaged in chewing this gum much in the same way I read Twilight.  I mocked it, I tried it, I didn’t love it, I found myself thinking about it, I took the rest of my brother’s pack, I bought a second pack, I bought a third pack, and now I’m writing about it.  Oh, and when I say that I bought a second and a third pack, I mean that I bought the third pack BEFORE the second pack was even opened.  As in I predicted that I would tear through the second pack so quickly that I needed a third pack in the wings to get me through the night.

What is your favourite gum?  Flavour and brand.


1 Kymberli { 05.15.11 at 9:33 am }

Favorite gum – juicy fruit.

Glad to know that my kids aren’t the only ones who learned about the drugs and REs before they learned about the birds and the bees. The idea that one could get pregnant without going to the doctor first was quite a surprise (“That’s so COOL, Mom!”) to them.

2 JustHeather { 05.15.11 at 10:20 am }

LOL! Kids say the darndest things!

In the USA, I love Big Red Cinnamon and in Finland, Jenkki’s spearmint.

3 PaleMother { 05.15.11 at 10:20 am }

Not sure what my favorite gum is … I neglect the gum option lately, for no particular reason. But my favorite sentence of the month has to be, “I mocked it, I tried it, I didn’t love it, I found myself thinking about it, I took the rest of my brother’s pack, I bought a second pack, I bought a third pack, and now I’m writing about it.” I love you, Mel.

PS. I do believe you just sold a couple more packs of that flavor for Wrigley … I think they should send you a case for a give away.

4 marilyn { 05.15.11 at 12:46 pm }

your kids are so adorable!!! I giggled through this whole post!!

5 Heather { 05.15.11 at 1:17 pm }


I love Original Trident, and also Dentyne Cinnamon. I despise gum that is too big for your mouth…like the Hubba Bubba of my youth.

6 Tigger { 05.15.11 at 1:23 pm }

I don’t really have a favorite gum as I try not to chew it. Why? Because I ALWAYS swallow it without realizing it. I used to do it on purpose but now, if I get distracted while chewing, the next thing I know it’s gone. I was also never particularly choosy about what gum I chewed – just whatever sounded good at the time.

7 Alissa { 05.15.11 at 2:35 pm }

What an an adorable post. I love that your kids know the “other” options of how to conceive a baby. It makes them more “real.” Favorite gum would have to be: Extra original flavor…great for bubble blowing. But I do try to stay away from gum now because of the artificial sugar in it.

8 BigP's Heather { 05.15.11 at 2:49 pm }

Fruit Stripes for the tattoos – obviously.

9 HereWeGoAJen { 05.15.11 at 2:58 pm }

Wait, how DO the lions get baby lions without fertility doctors?

I used to like gum, but I don’t think I’ve chewed any at all since high school.

10 Foxy { 05.15.11 at 3:53 pm }

My dad used to always keep juicy fruit in his car. My mom hated the sound of someone else chewing gum, so it was always a special treat that we shared with my dad. He would take us to McD’s too, which was off-limits with my mom. Even now when I smell juicy fruit it takes me to the wonderful special times that I spent with my dad as a child. Especially bittersweet since my dad has since chosen alcoholism over his family.

And as for your children, I absolutely LOVE that they know where A LOT of babies come from. If only I could have been exposed to this reality at a earlier age, it might have made our experience easier to normalize.

11 Queenie { 05.15.11 at 4:12 pm }

How does anyone go years without chewing gum? What do you do when you have to have a conversation with someone and haven’t had time or opportunity to brush your teeth?

I think it’s hilarious that your kids know about fertility doctors, but not how “regular” babies are made. Would love to be a fly on the wall in their school when a bunch of kids are inevitably talking about how babies are made.

12 luna { 05.15.11 at 6:37 pm }

I always want to buy gum because the new flavors sounds so good — sure, mint chip sounds kind of weird until you try it, but green apple sounds yum — BUT I refuse to buy them because of all the crap fake chemical sweetener they add. I just want some damned sugar, real freaking sugar in my gum. is that too much to ask? (honestly the only gum I ever chew now is the eco mint gum with no chemicals, and the flavor lasts for about, oh, 2 seconds.)

you rock star, you.

13 NotTheMama { 05.15.11 at 8:33 pm }

Extra Fruit Sensations Berry Pearadise. When I can find it. Doesn’t keep its flavor very long, but I can easily go through a pack a day 😉

14 a { 05.15.11 at 11:22 pm }

Trident Original is my favorite.

I can just picture you rocking the electric guitar (even badly).

My husband was commenting that he thought it was strange that my daughter knows all about c-sections, but not vaginal birth. Guess that’s along the same lines as the fertility doctor…

15 Farah { 05.15.11 at 11:50 pm }

Your Kids are Fantastic! I like the new Stride Mystery Pack

16 Anna { 05.16.11 at 6:05 am }

I agree that the twins are hilarious and fantastic, I am taken aback that they have so much insight. Congratulations on the guitar playing moment, maybe once you’ve mastered the art of scootery there could be an indestructable electric guitar in your house?

I stopped chewing gum after it was contra-indicated in a fertility stuff book some years ago, since then we have been parted. Last time I looked at chewing gum in a shop here in the UK we were still on largely mint, possibly juicy fruit or menthol or cinammon (only in really with it shops). It sounds like a different gum universe over there.

17 loribeth { 05.16.11 at 8:25 am }

Trident Peppermint (in sticks, not in the Chicklet-type tablet form that comes in blister packs). I also have a soft spot in my heart for Doublemint, since my Grandpa used to buy it for us when we were kids. But I don’t chew gum very often these days, just when I’m flying. I don’t like how it looks when people are chewing it — it’s so easy to forget to be subtle & just start chomping & smacking, lol. I am, however, addicted to Lifesavers Breathsavers mints (again, peppermint). I always have a few rolls in my purse.

Dh bought an electric guitar & amp from our nephew awhile back. It’s mostly just gathering dust but nephew wanted to sell & dh wanted to give him the money. I also think he wanted to feel like a rock star, lol.

And your story about the twins cracks me up. I’m with Queenie. I’d love to be a fly on the playground wall when THAT conversation comes up among their friends. ; )

18 Calliope { 05.16.11 at 8:28 am }

I love Big Red. LOVE it. But I stopped chewing it when I realized that I was getting pissed off about how quickly it lost its bite. You’d think I would be about peppermint gum- but no- I totally dig cinnamon gum. mmmm

Also? “I can forget a curse word in a second.” – should be the name of your new blog.


19 MeAndBaby { 05.16.11 at 9:06 am }

I was going through the sale ads from Sunday’s newspaper and every time I saw a picture of a scooter in a flyer, I thought of you. 🙂

Gum – my current favorite is Orbit sweet mint. I used to be a huge juicy fruit fan. Now it gags me. Literally.

And I love stories with the ChickieNob and the Wolvog. Thanks for sharing.

20 my lifelong dream { 05.16.11 at 10:31 am }

I love Orbitz gum, I think the flavor is sweet mint or something like that. Love the movie story, I always think half the fun of going to see a kids movie in the theatre is to hear what the kids say during the movie.


21 Somewhat Ordinary { 05.16.11 at 12:37 pm }

Your kids are the best!

My favorite gum is Orbit Wintermint. My all time favorite ice cream is Mint chocolate chip, but I can’t imagine gum that flavor.

22 Vee { 05.17.11 at 2:51 am }

I did have a chuckle at this post, your kids make me laugh.

You Americans have all the yummy flavours, we have the boring stuff.
I am a Spearment Extra girl.

23 TasIVFer { 05.17.11 at 7:28 pm }

Had you been listening to Canadian Idiot by Weird Al you wouln’t have had to worry about the muting. Just a suggestion. 😉

24 coffeegrl { 05.18.11 at 7:32 am }

I love gum! But it has to have long-lasting flavor. For this reason, I tend to lean toward Extra (winterfresh or peppermint)…although I’ve recently fallen in love with Trident original again.

25 Casey { 05.22.11 at 5:39 am }

I hear you on the electric guitar front. It’s such a position of power to be in. I’ve not played one for a while, but would love to do so again. By the way, there’s a Versatile Blogger award waiting for you at my place. 🙂 Diggin’ IComLeaveWe too.

26 Amy { 05.23.11 at 8:30 pm }

I have also been sucked into the mint chocolate chip gum. I felt the same way about it: thought it was okay but then kept on buying it. My body rebelled against dairy a while ago, so ice cream is out – this gum is the closest I’ve come to my favorite ice cream in years, only it doesn’t really taste like the ice cream, only I keep on buying it…

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