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336th Friday Blog Roundup

Seriously?  They needed a study in order to prove that if we had insurance coverage, we would actually elect to do single embryo transfers?  Did they actually think infertile women (and men) WANT to transfer multiple embryos and deal with those risks?  It didn’t occur to them that perhaps we make those choices because we’re paying out the nose for each cycle?  No?  Not obvious?

We’ve all been writing about this for years.  It seriously pains me that this is news.  But now that it is, for the love, give us insurance coverage because it will save money for all on the back-end.  NPR says so.


I am very much in love with post-it notes.  I always have a couple of pads around the house to jot down ideas or random things I’m trying to remember or construct to-do lists.  The ChickieNob recently asked me for her own pack of post-it notes because she had terribly important work that needed to get done.  I acquiesced, laying down a bunch of ground rules as to where post-it notes could be left after finding them lining the upstairs hallway.

She recently turned her play kitchen into her home office.

I was going to write something snarky about her terribly important work and then thought better of it when I looked down at the inane commentary I’ve  scribbled on the post-it notes on my desk.  Touche.


I shaved my legs for the first time this week since the beginning of winter.  Which means that, yes, I did go to that fancy winter wedding in a long ball gown with hairy legs.  And no one was the wiser.

I actually not only hate to shave my legs, but I actually like how it looks au natural.  Shaving my legs is the one thing I do for public appearance.  I don’t wear make-up, I don’t dye my hair, but I’ll shave my legs to blend in with the majority.  I don’t really have a reason for why I choose to do this.  It defies reason why I care.  Yet I do.  So out comes the razor when the weather gets warmer.

Where do you stand on the shaving leg front?


Remember how I’m offering one NaBloPoMo prompt in the Roundup to entice you to one day commit to doing NaBloPoMo?  It’s a chance to test in a comment if you have the brain power to do a full month of NaBloPoMo.

So try your hand at a single prompt each week and if you can think of an answer, perhaps consider doing the entire month at some point.

ComOnNaPro (Comment on NaBloPoMo Prompt): What three words do you hope other people use to describe you?

You can either answer this in a comment, or if you’re moved to do so, answer it in a post on your blog and then come back here and let me know the permalink to the post.


And now, the blogs…

Things get If’fy has a post about questions you can’t answer.  It’s a wisp of a post — it travels from one if to another (if she answers this way, if Linnea fell different…).  But it’s powerful in its quietness.

Three Little Birds has a beautiful post about sex and missing her husband.  I’m not sure why I found this so touching, but I did.  It’s one of those posts that I sat thinking about for a long time, wondering why I was so moved by it.  And unable to come up with the words, I instead send it out there so you can be moved by it too.

Tippy and Tidy’s Tumultuous Trip to Toddlers has a post about hanging out with her sisters in the city.  These trips recharge her because “…besides the good food, drink and dressing up, it’s also great to be reminded that there are a lot of women out there near my age who aren’t mom’s yet and that’s… ok!”  It’s an excellent reminder that this reality exists — even if the reality that surrounds you is otherwise.

Lastly, Delayed in DINKville has a post about opening up to friends and family about their infertility.  She explains all the times when she didn’t tell others what they were going through and what became the tipping point where she sent a letter that she held onto as a draft for months.  She writes, “I’m so glad that we sent it. Sending the e-mail felt liberating.  It felt like the right time to finally “out” ourselves.  I felt like I got rid of a huge weight I had been carrying around.”  The post, of course, is an excellent reminder that NIAW is right around the corner beginning on the 24th.  And I loved reading the aftermath from sending the letter.

The roundup to the Roundup: the whole family is now overusing post-its.  Shaved my legs — how about you?  ComOnNaPro.  And lots of great posts to read.


1 Sharon { 04.15.11 at 11:40 am }

I hate shaving my legs. I always put it off as long as possible (and when I have a little discretionary income, I get them waxed, which lasts longer). If I could afford it, I would have laser hair removal so I never have to again. But like you, I feel the need to conform to society’s expectations.

Three words I hope people use to describe me: kind, intelligent, fun. (Gah, I’ve made myself sound like a golden retriever!)

2 Sharon { 04.15.11 at 11:42 am }

Oh, forgot to address your first point. We are getting ready to do a DE IVF cycle, and we have talked about this very issue. We would be 100% on board with doing an eSET because we don’t particularly want twins. However, given that we are paying $30K out of pocket for this procedure, we have concluded that “two is better than zero” and will be transferring two embryos and letting the chips fall where they may. Even though our RE told us point-blank at our initial DE consultation that the twin rate at his clinic is 40%. So we are really rolling the dice here, and I just hope and pray that it doesn’t come back to bite is in the a$$ in the form of pre-term labor or other complications.

3 Sarah { 04.15.11 at 11:57 am }

Sharon’s comment that they decided “two is better than zero” is exactly how we feel on this second child FET! We went round and round, but we are paying out of pocket. We wish we could do one at a time, but the money isn’t there. So we put in two and if we are blessed with twins, we will panic, then roll with it 🙂

So three words I hope people use to describe me. Hmmm… I guess I would have to say:

Dedicated, Sincere, Funny

Maybe funny shouldn’t be on the list, but I think my humor brings a lot to my family, my friendships, and my outlook on life. I take pride in the fact that I can find the humor in things others wouldn’t. That I can make people laugh when they need it most.

4 Blanche { 04.15.11 at 12:03 pm }

In college I was shocked when one of my friends (who happened to be a dancer) said she hadn’t shaved her legs all winter. Dance tights over hairy legs: shudder! I wanted to start shaving my legs in middle school because I hated the way hose felt over the hair. At that time I think I was shaving every other day? Now I’m the one not shaving my legs on a regular basis, of course, I’m not wearing hose on a regular basis either (thank God!). But I do love the way my legs feel the day I’ve shaved them. And I do shave more regularly in the warmer months than when I can argue it’s use as insulation! 🙂

5 Genevieve { 04.15.11 at 12:09 pm }

I HATE shaving my legs, and in fact regularly go all winter without doing it. I think I went 2 years once. But I hate defending my hairy legs when summer rolls around and I am in shorts and such. I am a hairy beast. Stupid social norms.

6 Baby Smiling In Back Seat { 04.15.11 at 12:09 pm }

Oh Mel, they have to do studies on obvious things or some people won’t believe it. Certainly it’s more prudent to base public policy on data than hunches.

Leg shaving: only when I have to. Or if I’m planning to seduce someone.

Three words:
C is for Conscientious.
C is for Cerebral.
C is for Cookie.
That’s good enough for me.

7 Megan { 04.15.11 at 12:13 pm }

Ugh. I HATE shaving my legs. My leg hair is currently a little over 1/4″. When I wear skirts during the winter, I wear wool tights, so no one knows. The only reason I shave them at all during the winter is because my husband likes them shaved, but he doesn’t do a very good job of appreciating it when I do shave, so I don’t do it as often as I would if he did notice better.

When it gets warmer, I shave every couple of weeks and definitely go bare-legged with a little more stubble than I think most people would consider acceptable, but my hair is light, so that helps a little with the noticeability.

Also, I’m with Sharon on the if-I-could-afford-it-I-would-have-laser-hair-removal-so-I-never-have-to-again front. That would be awesome.

8 Heidi { 04.15.11 at 12:20 pm }

Oh yes, it’s inaugural spring waxing time. That first round is always the worst. But if you want to minimize the shaving time, this stuff really does work *plus* it makes your winter-white legs a little tan so it’s not quite so blinding the first time you put on shorts (and by “you” I mean “me”): http://www.amazon.com/Nivea-Sun-Kissed-Beautiful-Gradual-Moisturizer/dp/B001W0QHF4

9 Nikki { 04.15.11 at 12:37 pm }

I am probably in the minority but I love shaving my legs. I do it daily even if I don’t leave the house. I can’t stand to feel stubbly. I even shave my arm hair because I can’t stand it either. I knew I would never be able to handle Survivor for this very reason.

10 sunflowerchilde { 04.15.11 at 12:42 pm }

I hate shaving, but I like my legs when they are shaved. But I like it probably exactly because I don’t do it very often, so it’s always a novelty. It also is the only thing I do to please societal norms of looking nice. I don’t wear make-up, style my hair, or follow fashion. But I do shave my legs. Once in a while.

11 Chickenpig { 04.15.11 at 1:31 pm }

All of our cycles were covered by insurance by 80%, but our RE suggested we transfer 2 embryos per cycle, so we did. It is a good thing, because out of 12 embryos transferred total, only 3 have resulted in live births. It took 8 embryos alone by the time we took home our twins. As much as I didn’t care to have multiples, the idea of the amount of years it would have taken me to transfer all of those embryos one at a time is mind boggling. Not to mention all those shots and what have you, which is the same no matter how many you transfer. It is most likely that if I transferred 8 embryos at once I would be lucky to have two of them implant, and I was only 32 during my first cycle, 37 at my last. In short, it really depends upon what the doctor suggests. My RE would never let me transfer more than 2 (not that I would, mind you).

I never shave my legs in the cold weather months. It drives me CRAZY to wear pants when hair is growing back it itches so terribly. Unless I am going to be able to expose my legs, I don’t shave. Although I do admit to shaving my legs during the end of my pregnancy with the twins because I knew I would be in a hospital Johnny. Why? How? search me, I probably wouldn’t do it again.

12 HereWeGoAJen { 04.15.11 at 1:40 pm }

I hate shaving my legs. Hate it. Someday I will get the laser hair removal and then I will invite you over for the celebratory burning of the razors.

13 Erica { 04.15.11 at 2:27 pm }

I love the way my legs feel just after shaving them. However, I don’t know if I love shaving my legs or if I just love what it represents, which for me boils down to something like 1) more than 10 minutes in the bathroom by myself, 2) a chance to indulge in feeling girly, and 3) a chance to pretend for an hour or two that I’m one of those well-groomed women who gets a mani pedi every month, wears makeup, and who ALWAYS brushes her hair before leaving the house.

Though the post by Three Little Birds has just made me cry, so it’s probably good that I’m not wearing mascara.

14 electriclady { 04.15.11 at 2:27 pm }

Hopefully having real data to confirm what we all instinctively know will result in some public policy changes…pretty please?

I thought of you and the whole discussion of celebrities and infertility last night when I was up late for no good reason and flipping through the channels and landed on Jimmy Kimmel, which I NEVER watch, and an interview with Tom Arnold, whom I NEVER would have thought I’d be interested in. And lo and behold, there he was talking about his MF infertility:

15 Kristi { 04.15.11 at 2:33 pm }

I shave several times a week I am italian and if I don’ they look like weeds. I shave mainly for DH and my love of dresses and shorts. I wear dresses all the time and hate tights/panty hose, etc. I am hairy enough my legs and armpits are the one reprive I give my hubby.

16 Bodega Bliss { 04.15.11 at 2:41 pm }

Oh my, I totally hate shaving my legs. But my excuse (besides complete laziness) is that every single time I do, no matter what combo shaving cream/razor I use, I end up getting itchy red bumps. I have super sensitive skin…so yeah, that’s my excuse. The hubby could care less and kind of likes it. I just start to feel unfeminine after a while. So that’s when I finally break down and shave and deal with the itching.

17 Heather { 04.15.11 at 2:49 pm }

Shaving. See, I have this issue with shaving—lately. Since my skin is so freaking a mess right now, it looks terrible. So the dermatologist told me to use an electric razor, which I don’t like, because you still look hairy. So then I bought the “Smooth Away” and surprisingly enough, it sorta works OK. But it takes forever.

So, I’m back to regular razor. Even though my legs are a hot, rashy mess.

I don’t enjoy being a girl for this reason.

18 Hope { 04.15.11 at 3:17 pm }

I hate shaving my legs, but I do it sometimes. I would love to participate in NaBlaPoMo if it weren’t for the fact that the sign-up page requires my birth date. I just don’t give that info out on-line if I can help it. And I don’t see why NaBlaPoMo needs to know when I was born. Maybe you can do something about that?

19 lostintranslation { 04.15.11 at 3:18 pm }

Hmm, we get IVFs 100% covered here in France, but for the two we did so far, we chose to have two embryos transferred each time – I guess the desire to become pregnant (and thus having more chance transferring two) was more important to us than the risk of having multiples (and IVF#1 gave us our son, IVF#2 was a BFN – we’ll have a SET with our FET, because we only have one frosty).

I use “it’s like shaving the second leg” quite regularly when I’m talking about a tedious job… But I also hate having hairy legs, so I try to do it ever so often (but not so often in winter, I’ll admit).

20 loribeth { 04.15.11 at 7:50 pm }

I shave my legs once a week, sometimes twice in the summer. I don’t love doing it, but I do love the results!

21 Sara { 04.15.11 at 8:20 pm }

I’d definitely choose a sET if someone else was paying the bill. It strikes me as a total no-brainer.

I shaved my legs last week for the first time in 6 months in honor of spring, as is my norm in early April of every year. I can see no reason at all to shave in the winter. There really isn’t any good reason in summer either, but I’m self-conscious.

22 Kristin { 04.15.11 at 9:03 pm }

I periodically shave my legs. Luckily, my leg hair is so light that it isn’t too noticeable. I do think it’s just laziness that causes me to not shave them.

23 Shadow of My Former Self { 04.15.11 at 11:02 pm }

I don’t think I’ve ever really forgotten the exhilaration of shaving my legs for the very first time. I couldn’t wait to start shaving as a pre teen! I still associate it with being feminine and well groomed so even now I do it regularly.

My NaBloPoMo post is



24 a { 04.15.11 at 11:06 pm }

I don’t have time to shave lately. But, my husband is on his way home, so I will try to find some time. I don’t mind shaving because I get very itchy if I go too long without doing it.

Adjectives…hmmm…straightforward, entertaining, down-to-earth, maybe?

25 Missy { 04.16.11 at 1:14 am }

Shaving is time consuming and yucky. And the bathtub afterward is pretty yucky too. Lasers didn’t work for me so I’m doomed to be a woolly mammoth for life. I’m learning to be okay with that.

I always wonder where people think the money for infertility treatments comes from. Do they think only rich people want to have kids? Where is the common sense at and how many treatments could have been paid for with the money wasted on that study?

26 NotTheMama { 04.16.11 at 1:32 am }

I could write a whole post on my shaving habits (or lack thereof), but this reminds me of an issue with my foot. I noticed a couple months ago that I couldn’t feel myself shaving a patch of skin near my the outside top of my ankle. If I rub that area, it tingles all the way down to my toes. It’s starting to tingle more often, but it’s not painful. Some people are freaking out and telling me I need to see a doctor NOWWWW!!!! Is it really that big a deal? What could it be?

27 Rebecca { 04.16.11 at 2:49 pm }

I hate shaving my legs and barely ever do it.

28 Mina { 04.17.11 at 5:47 am }

Apparently, all you have to do to have the masses believe the obvious truth you are saying is to slap on a ‘studies have shown that’ before the actual statement and it is all fine. Better yet, have it worded as ‘a study conducted by a group of British scientist has shown that X and Y’ and no one will doubt you. Ever. Not even if you are trying to persuade people you have a two headed chicken that gives birth to live frogs. Right. On to more serious topics.

I honestly believed that I am a weirdo who walks around on hairy legs all winter. And it is not because I am European (:-p) but because I hate all the hair removal business. I used to wax I when I had the time. And then I started having ingrown hairs – which is awful, because it makes all the waxing pointless, since you can still see the darn hairs…
So now, when I have infinitely less time than before, I shave it when I need to. Hubs does not object at all (bless his soul, he IS a very good man). And this all means that I go weeks on end without shaving. (I am not able yet to recall events that stretch past a fortnight, and so I use a generic term).

Wow, this must be one of the most rambling comments I ever posted… Sorry, Mel, you had to be the recipient. One word that I doubt will ever apply to me is ‘concise’.

I hope people think of me as kind, considerate and smart. I honestly believe kindness is the best human quality, which sadly is less and less popular. Considerate is kind smartness. And smartness is, for me, intelligence with humour. There, I managed to squeeze one more word. 😉 Ain’t I sneaky? :-p I should put it on a post it, shouldn’t I?

29 Vee { 04.17.11 at 6:52 pm }

Thank you for your acknowledgment.
I Love the ChikieNobs post it’s, what a great drawing.

Just coming out of Summer and being at the beach and swimming lessons with Boo, I have been shaving my legs. On the odd occasion I have forgotten and I don’t care, what’s a bit of hair? I can guarantee you though unless I go swimming during winter my legs will go unshaven for the season. I do hate shaving.

30 coffeegrl { 04.17.11 at 10:10 pm }

Shaving my legs is kind of a phase for me. I’ll go through a phase where I enjoy the ritual of it – the lotions, quiet “me” time in the shower (so rare these days) the smooth and luscious feeling afterward. But lots of time, for months on end, I can’t be bothered.

31 magpie { 04.18.11 at 10:31 am }

I’m with you on the make-up, hair and legs. Go figure.

32 Carrie { 04.18.11 at 11:27 am }

I don’t like shaving the legs, but I do it no matter the season. I don’t like the feeling of them stubbly, but I mostly do it so the hubby doesn’t have to feel it.

33 Nancypants { 04.22.11 at 9:01 am }

Hi, Stopping by for ICLW. I love shaving my legs and underarms – in fact it’s a problem for me. I can’t function if they are not shaved! It’s up there with brushing my teeth, washing my face, and putting on contacts or glasses. I know, weird!


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