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Friday Blog Roundup

In another month, it will be my first blogoversary (June 25th). I know, I know, these blogs grow up so fast. Just the other day it was a little toddler, asking questions about the worst thing anyone has ever said to you in regards to infertility and now it’s a surly teenager, stealing cigarettes from the local 7-11 and drinking beer under the bleachers.

I mean, it’s now almost a year old.

And I know that everyone’s blog turns a year old at some point. I know that many people have blogs that are two, three, or even four. But almost 500 posts in a first year feels like it’s cause for celebration.

Um…will y’all come to my blogaversary party? We can’t really have drinking games and cake, but we can have a week of festivities (and yes, I’m one of those people who take a birthweek rather than a simple birthday). I mean, I will have a cake here, but one of the ideas I had was The Great Cake Day where everyone treats themselves either to a homemade cake or a decadent dessert on the same day and takes a photo for their blog and posts the recipe if they make the cake themselves (and I want J to teach me how she made the sushi cake). And even more fun, it would be a great day for bloggers in the same city to get together and share cakes.

Another idea I had to commemorate the week was a Commentathon. Sort of like the MS Read-a-thon you did in elementary school where you frantically read in order to beat your classmates (I mean…raised money to combat MS), except people would pledge you to comment on blogs. I haven’t gotten this entire idea figured out, but it definitely involves a lot of commenting and a lot of reading and a lot of loving crossing the community in a single week.

Why do I deserve a week of festivities when my blog is no more special than anyone else’s blog? Because I’m asking for it. It’s not that I’m more deserving–it’s just that I have the chutzpah to ask. And the other reason is that while my blog is my own thoughts and feelings, I have always seen it more as a public space–a public living room sans crap bucket or a bar that serves virtual drinks. So it’s really a celebration of all of us–an entire community of men and women who are bonded together by a simple pomegranate-coloured thread.

What do you think? Will you eat cake and comment and join in whatever hairbrained activities I think up for this week-long celebration? Consider this a pre-party RSVP to find out if anyone would even be willing to eat cake. Online. At the same time. Before I spend more time coming up with ideas of how we can virtually come together for a week-long love fest.

So…now back to your regularly scheduled round-up:

Julie at A Little Pregnant had a wonderful post this week called “Worth It” where she muses about the idea of stopping the process of adding to her family. When she talks about how enticing it is to simply stop, people assume she means that she is seeing the benefits to being done with babyhood–a sweet time, but definitely a hard time. But it isn’t that. It’s the idea of being finished with trying to conceive–the roller coaster of emotions and the difficult decisions. For those who haven’t had trouble conceiving, they overlook the stress of conception and only consider the diapers and bottles and cracked nipples and sleeplessness. But for those who need to clear the hurdle of conception or carrying first? It’s a minefield that few have the tenacity to walk across again and again. And yet, when you know what you’ll miss by not walking through that minefield to the other side? It is enough to break your heart as you stand in place. Sending good thoughts to you as you suss this out.

Asheggy at The Spirit of Magnolia had a post this week about letting go of a dream. Even when you are 1000 kinds of excited to adopt, there still is a mourning process that takes place as you shut the book on pregnancy. As a step in that mourning process, Asheggy placed her fertility monitor for sale on Ebay. And felt liberated by having this reminder out of her house. Until…she went to the hospital to visit a friend who just gave birth and the wave of nevers toppled over her: As I looked at “R” I just couldn’t stand the fact that ‘THAT WOULD NEVER BE ME! I would never carry a baby to term. I would never be in a maternity ward delivering a baby. I would never be blessed with a labor/delivery experience.” It is a very moving post.

Peep at Conflicted is moving onto her first egg donor cycle. In a post this week, she has a paragraph that moved me beyond belief: “Anyway, we are moving on to a donor egg. I am excited about it. Maybe I am in denial but I think I have had long enough to roll it over in my mind and now I am ok with it. I told my husband the other day that one day this precious little girl (?) is going to walk up to us and say mommy, daddy …something cute… and we are going to be glad my eggs sucked because we wouldn’t have THIS one! I know it’s corny and way too positive but that is where I am at now and I have to do what it takes to be at peace with not having a genetic child.” I love that idea that if all the other cycles had worked, you wouldn’t have that child (either now or in the future). Okay, so I wish these cycles would work, but it’s also a gorgeous thought.

Jay at Making Cakes the Hard Way has this melancholy little post this week that I loved. It starts with a description of what so many of us feel at some point or anot
her on this journey: “At the risk of sounding like I’m having a mid-life crisis (I’m not, but that would probably be easier to define), at the moment I feel like I’m stuck in a strange sort of existential limbo. Neither here nor there; not finished with doing something, but not started with the next thing either; not really anywhere solid, safe nor secure.” The entry then continues into a brilliant analogy between trying to conceive and moving to a new house. And you need to read the whole thing to get it, but I promise that you’re going to be nodding along and saying, “so true.”

Lastly, in a blogosphere that is known for desiring a positive, Adrienne at Max’s Mommy explains why a negative can sometimes be a good thing. It’s a thought that has gone through the pregnancy loss journals from time to time (Tina recently had a similar thought on the Waiting Blilt). But it’s a beautiful post about answered prayers that keep a woman from going through another loss. It always moves me when I read something that expands my understanding of life and death and the whispered prayers that fall in between.

So there were three big winners of last week’s guessing game. Somewhat Ordinary, Bea and Karen each got four out of five correct. So you have won this nifty sidebar icon for your blog as well as bragging rights until the next Guess-That-Blogger Roundup. And everyone else in the roundup should grab the roundup icon to add to your post as well. If you want it. No pressure.

In closing…
Your tasks in this order:
1. Send a pre-RSVP whether you would participate in a week of blogoversary festivities if I came up with a week of activities.
2. Read these incredible blog posts above and leave the author a comment.
3. If you live in the U.S., have a wonderful holiday weekend.


1 Carlynn { 05.25.07 at 6:49 am }

I’m in! Especially for the cake idea, love that one. And the commenting one is really cool, sounds like fun.

Happy birthday by the way!

2 Samantha { 05.25.07 at 8:05 am }

I’d love to attend (and eat cake), but… I’m going to be traveling from June 22-26, so is it okay to partially participate? I can be in on the tail end of the week.

3 Bean { 05.25.07 at 8:32 am }

No one ever needs to twist my arm to get me to bake or eat cake. Count me in.


4 andrea_jennine { 05.25.07 at 8:38 am }

Blogiversary party – yes! Only, Samantha’s comment reminded me that I’ll be out of town that whole week, too…

5 Egged Out { 05.25.07 at 8:49 am }

Both ideas are great! Eating the cake is for our own pleasure and commenting on everyone’s blog is for all of us to really feel part of this community.

6 Erin { 05.25.07 at 8:54 am }

Count me in for the Blogiversiweek! The comment-a-thon sounds like a great idea! It’s so easy to read a lot of posts and get support, laughs, etc. out of them for ourselves, but commenting definitely completes the circle. Happy Blogiversary!

7 TeamWinks { 05.25.07 at 9:07 am }

Hmm, twist my arm to eat cake! Geez, how terrible! Of course, mine will have “Welcome Home” written on it for my parents, but we can raise our glasses in a toast to the occasion as well!

8 Tina { 05.25.07 at 9:17 am }

I am in… Just give me some warning so I can play “hookie” on work time to be a post-a-holic! 😉

I am good a decorating cakes – you bake, and I will decorate!

9 Bobby and Ivy { 05.25.07 at 10:43 am }

Checking in after a bit of an absence to say I’d love to celebrate with you! (Especially now that I can eat again!!!) Congrats!

10 Reproductive Jeans { 05.25.07 at 10:46 am }

Of course Ill come=) Thanks for the invite–and happy early anniversary! I too will be travelling from june 22-26, so I will have to celebrate early and check back in when I get back!

11 Shelby { 05.25.07 at 11:39 am }

I’m definitely in! The 25th is my birthday, so it’s all about celebrating for me anyways!

12 Twisted Ovaries { 05.25.07 at 12:03 pm }

Oooh, it’s a holiday weekend in the UK, too. I think both the US and the UK celebrate Memorial Day this coming Monday.

I’ll be taking it easy.

I assume you will be, too 🙂

13 decemberbaby { 05.25.07 at 12:31 pm }

An excuse to eat cake? Twist my rubber arm! Oh, and count me in.

14 A.M.S. { 05.25.07 at 12:39 pm }

I’m all in, particularly for cake. Can we get Stacie to bring the ice cream? I’m dying to try that honey-cardamom flavor she keeps ranting about.

15 Somewhat Ordinary { 05.25.07 at 12:57 pm }

Wow, I didn’t know guessing right would get me a cool icon!!

Count me in on the birthday celebration! I’m trying to stay away from carbs and sugar, but hopefully I’ll be nearing the end of my first IUI 2ww and could use the distraction (and the sweets).

16 A { 05.25.07 at 1:28 pm }

I’m in…mmmmm, caaaake (homer simpson voice). I love the idea of commenting on everyone’s blog too.

17 megan { 05.25.07 at 1:39 pm }

i’m definitely in on the cake eating part! happy blogiversary!
great round up, too!

18 Trish { 05.25.07 at 1:52 pm }

Did someone say CAKE?
I’m IN!

19 vee { 05.25.07 at 2:02 pm }

Cake I can do (like I need an excuse).
Festivities too.
And we have a Bank Holiday weekend here in the UK too, so it’s nice to know I’ll be enjoying not working with my American friends!

20 Tammy { 05.25.07 at 2:46 pm }

Thanks for this blog and the links. I just recently found you and although it’s been a long time since we really TTC (we’ve never not tried IYKWIM) I’m experiencing a whole other wave of grieving the losses of infertility. I’m a Mom of two beautiful kids through adoption and still, it hurts. And I’ve found some wonderful words of encouragement here. Thanks. And Happy Anniversary!!!

21 ms. c { 05.25.07 at 4:28 pm }

OF COURSE I will eat cake. And take a picture. And send everyone a slice. And do whatever you ask of me for Blogiversary Week. You deserve a ginormous celebration for your contribution to our community has been unbelievable this year. (My Blogiversary is June 12, btw… we can celebrate together.)
Thanks for the round up this week (I LOVE the icons, they’re too funny.)

22 Karaoke Diva { 05.25.07 at 4:43 pm }

I would totally participate in a week of blogoversary festivities! And I’m always up for having my cake and eating it, too.

23 Michell { 05.25.07 at 5:45 pm }

Sounds like fun to me. But then, I never turn down a chance to eat cake, or more importantly, frosting. I don’t know if I have anyone to take my picture though.

24 Sunny { 05.25.07 at 8:27 pm }

I am totally in. It would be a great way to celebrate the beginning of my summer!

25 Karianne { 05.25.07 at 10:05 pm }

Count me in for the party!

26 Jamie { 05.26.07 at 5:26 am }

A week of celebration sounds fun. Count me in! 🙂

27 sariel & shlomit { 05.26.07 at 3:51 pm }

Sorry i’ve been bogged down and behind in my blog reading?!?!?
happy blog-o-versry! what was the blogland like before the stirrup queens?!?! i’m in for the festivities!
we canadians beat you to the punch and had a great long weekend last weekend…but we’re cheering you on this one!

btw, i can speak dutch (not very well!) and understand it quite well! my parents did speak dutch in our home but prided themselves on being fluent in english…i crack up when i hear them speaking to dutch people cos it’s all sprinkled with english!

okay, i’m off to catch up on more blogs!!!

28 Stacie { 05.26.07 at 6:53 pm }

I will eat cake. And comment. I’m easy.

29 Sami { 05.27.07 at 7:37 am }

I’m in – at least I would do my best to be in…

30 KarenO { 05.27.07 at 9:34 am }

Count me in too … sounds like great fun! 🙂

31 Changing Expectations { 05.27.07 at 9:58 pm }

I’m in Mel. Who can say “no” to cake???

32 Bea { 05.28.07 at 4:13 am }

I’d like to RSVP to the party. Tell me what to bring and to where.


33 Wen782 { 05.28.07 at 6:56 pm }

You said cake. ‘Nuff said. 🙂

34 LJ { 05.29.07 at 10:00 am }

You know I am all about a blogaversary celebration. You are totally the living room where we all hang out and meet new friends.

Maybe the next DC get together could coincide with the festivities, and we can get a REAL cake!!!

35 PCOSMama { 05.29.07 at 1:05 pm }

I’m always willing to eat cake! Heck, I don’t usually even need a reason, so it will be nice to actually have one!

36 j { 06.01.07 at 3:11 pm }

I’m there – but those sushi cakes were a bitch to make. I can make…syringe shaped cake.

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