428th Friday Blog Roundup
We had a partial snow day yesterday so we read a chapter of Harry Potter 4 before school. We’re post Goblet of Fire spitting out the names and now navigating Ron’s reaction. We spent just as much time discussing how Ron views Harry’s life vs. his own as we did reading the actual book. I think I had glossed over just how jealous they are of one another and how they react so differently to their personal jealousy back when I read these books to myself.
Ron sees Harry as having fame and attention — exactly what he wants because he comes from a large family of overachievers and thinks he lacks an element that sets him apart from his siblings. (Until, you know, Book 7. But he doesn’t know that yet. And beyond that, I think Mrs. Weasley would have disagreed with Ron’s self-assessment.) He is so massively jealous of the adoration his friend receives. And Harry sees Ron as having family and love — exactly what he doesn’t have seeing that his parents are gone and his only living relatives hate him. Who cares about the adoration of people who don’t really know you (but only know your fame)? He would much rather have Ron’s situation of a big, loving family who care for Ron simply because he’s Ron.
So they’re both jealous of each other, but Ron expresses that jealousy towards Harry whereas Harry swallows that jealousy in order to stand as close as he can to what he wants. Ron lashes out, pushing Harry away, and Harry keeps his sadness in check in order to keep coming back to the Burrow. In neither case is the jealousy itself problematic — people are going to feel what people are going to feel. It’s only the expression of that jealousy that becomes problematic.
It also leads to the hidden message that runs throughout the books: anyone can find fame — it happens for the best and worst of reasons — but it’s much more difficult to find love. So if you can only choose one — fame or love — go with love every time.
Chew on that.
My friend introduced me to the world’s greatest app, which also comes in website form: donothingfor2minutes.com. The website isn’t as good as the free app. You have 6 choices of duration of time with the app and 4 different moving visuals. I’ve been mostly using the waves coming in.
I left the phone on my bed and ran downstairs to get something, and when I came back up, the kids were both lying on top of my blanket, watching the ocean for 2 minutes. Blissed out.
And now the blogs…
But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:
- “Don’t Go Slick” (Stirrup Queens) — thank you, Lori and A
- “Fear” (Relaxing Doesn’t Make Babies)
- “Who am I?” (Stumbling Gracefully)
- “Those in Glass Houses Will Throw Stones” (Too Many Fish to Fry)
- “Photo Finishing” (Blood Signs)
- “Six Years Without Her” (An Expat’s Journal)
- “Forty Weeks” (Baby-Making Merry-Go-Round)
- “Unresolved But in Transition” (The Infertility Voice)
- “Don’t Save the Date” (Stirrup Queens) — thank you, Cristy.
- “Jinx 2” (Single Infertile Female)
- “Life after Infertility” (La Belette Rouge)
- “The Exhilarating Tension Between Being and Becoming” (Baby Smiling in Back Seat)
- “The ‘I’ Word” (Stumbling Gracefully)
- “Help. I’ve Fallen, and I Can’t…. Oh, F*@k It.” (Schrodinger’s Catbox)
- “The Burden of Hope” (Something Beautiful)
Okay, now my choices this week.
Single Infertile Female has a post on what happened when her nervousness intersected with her first foster care class, and she overshared the details of her life. I found this post so touching because it was so human. Through words, she manages to package the excitement and anxiety of the unknowns and the thrill and the fear all wrapped up in one group discussion.
My Scar Smiles at Me has a post about time, especially the happiness and fear of it moving quickly. On one hand, the days passing at a good clip means she’s that much closer to the finish line. On the other hand, the days passing at a good clip means she’s that much closer to the finish line. But it’s the ending that made me catch my breath. It’s just lovely.
It’s above because it straddles two weeks, but I also loved La Belette Rouge’s post giving concrete advice on how she stepped away from treatments. While prepping for a panel at a conference on the topic, she puts into focus all the ways she reached the point she’s at where she has let go and resolved her infertility. It’s a moving post, but it’s also an important post. It literally holds out a hand to the reader. I especially loved this side effect of being a speaker: “In talking about my process of letting go I got to see how far I’ve come.”
Mrs. Spit’s “You Will Dazzle Them“… What can I even say to do this post justice? Except that I think it should be required reading for middle schoolers on a daily basis, and after that, perhaps moving to required reading once a month like a vitamin.
Lastly, Life as I Know It has two posts that stuck with me this week. One was about her son’s reaction to specialized parking spots as opposed to her own thoughts. The other is about mentally marking her sons’ due date; how this date still holds meaning for her even though they have a birthdate. And more than that, discovering she isn’t the only one who thinks about that date. Loved both posts.
The roundup to the Roundup: Ron and Harry’s mutual jealousy. Most relaxing app/website in the world. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between January 18th and January 25th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week? Read the original open thread post here.