When I taught, I always knew when I was done for the day. When I left campus, I usually left work back on campus with few exceptions. Therefore, when I left campus, I was done for the day. The work was there for me to restart again in the morning.

But I’ve been working remotely now for 19 years. 19 years! And it’s much harder to know when I am done for the day. If I’ve ticked everything off the to-do list, and it’s beyond a certain hour, am I done for the day? If I have to stop so I can make dinner, am I done? I’ve been trying to move to a different room to work on personal projects and delineate between work and home.

But if I had nothing to do after work, there is a chance I would just keep working. So I make myself things I need to do.

Oliver Burkeman recently wrote about the concept of being done for the day. He explains: “When you end the day feeling like there’s vastly more you ought to have done, you’re telling your nervous system it can’t take a break; and you’re reinforcing an idea of your work as an oppressive and insatiable force.” So he encourages you to set a point in the morning when you will know you are done for the day and stick to that endpoint. It’s more about “feeling done” than actually “being done.”

It’s an interesting read if you also struggle with this.

I like Nathan Bransford’s blog, mostly because he asks interesting questions and then sometimes re-asks them, year after year, charting the answers. A recent question: “Where are you spending time online these days? Have you noticed your habits shifting?”

It made me realize how the internet has gone the way of television. You know how it used to be that large groups of people watched the same shows at the same time? Many many many people watched, for example, Friends on Thursday nights. Cable fractured that, and streaming services fractured it more, so there is rarely a television event we’re collectively tuned into at the same time on the same day.

Communities used to go to the same sites, making it easy to find your group. For instance, Babycenter, IVFC, or the Resolve boards. But now that we’ve fractured into so many spaces on the internet, it feels harder than ever to make connections. As the internet grows and gives us more options to gather, we gather in smaller groups and make looser connections.

How do you find new people and connections when there are so many places to go?

Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is? Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.

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There was a story/idea going around the Internet a few weeks ago about trip planning Google Doc exchanges; these detailed Google Docs that people compile and trade with recommendations for various cities.

And it sounded like a great idea if you knew the person and knew you traveled similarly. For instance, I know someone who likes to go to vineyards when they travel. We don’t drink. So, a Google Doc with vineyard recommendations wouldn’t be helpful. But someone who loves historical sites and weird finds? That would be a fantastic exchange.

But then I realized I could get that without a Google Doc simply by checking out Rick Steves’ itinerary coupled with Atlas Obscura.

What do you think? Would you use a stranger’s Google Doc?

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Are you also doing #MicroblogMondays? Add your link below. The list will be open until Tuesday morning. Link to the post itself, not your blog URL. (Don’t know what that means? Please read the three rules on this post to understand the difference between a permalink to a post and a blog’s main URL.) Only personal blogs can be added to the list. I will remove any posts connected to businesses or sponsored posts.

A few weeks ago, the Washington Post ran an article about a seemingly idyllic social network that sounded like the Internet pre-blog-hate sites. I don’t need to name them — you clearly know them and how people piled on certain bloggers. But before Facebook and Twitter and before those sites, blogging felt like sitting on the front porch, talking. Everyone in the ALI community was my neighbour. I went from blog to blog, collecting wisdom, nodding, and generally feeling like I had a community of smart people to ask questions and gain support.

So, I was thrilled to read about the site and a little jealous that it wasn’t in my state. But when I went to Google the site, I saw a very different reaction from users online who complained about how the site was just as tense as my own neighbourhood listserv despite the dek promising “unkindness is strictly prohibited.”

Are humans doomed to ruin every community we create to connect with one another? It sort of feels that way sometimes.

While Beorn is definitely better than he was last Saturday, he still isn’t completely himself. He’ll wheek for treats or food, but he doesn’t popcorn around while waiting for me to do his bidding. He’ll eat vegetables if he doesn’t see his green bowl. That thing TERRIFIES him, which is strange because if you remember, he deeply mourned the matching green hay dish.

He will not walk into two-thirds of his cage. If I put food in the back of the cage and set him down, he’ll eat for about four minutes before he remembers that he doesn’t like this section of the cage and runs back to the front third of the cage, leaving the food behind. He will not drink from his water bottle even though I moved it to the front third of the cage. He will not sleep inside his hide-y house or go near it. He will not play the game we play with an alfalfa cookie every night before bed.

I spoke to the vet, who told me to give him time. He had a big scare, and he needs to gain confidence. In the meantime, I should do what makes him comfortable, including placing the vegetables on the ground near him and giving him cuddles instead of exercise.

I am dubious whether this will help him return to his old ways, but I’m giving the cage another thorough washing this weekend, so we’ll see if he resets on Monday.

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Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second, helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. To read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• None… sniff.

Okay, now my choices this week.

Infertile Phoenix got a baby shower invitation. She writes: “I’m excited to be invited. I’m looking forward to celebrating my friend’s daughter. I’m not making plans for after the shower in case it stirs up my emotions. But it might not. The truth is, I don’t want to be pregnant anymore.” I think that’s such a brilliant point — leave yourself space after the shower. It’s a tiny thing you can do for yourself, just in case.

Middle Girl writes about the dreaded household task of taking care of the laundry. It’s not the folding or sorting; it’s that the activity is a time-suck as she waits for it to be done in a noisy space. It made me think about the household task I would be most happy to give up. It may be meal planning. I dislike the planning even more than the cooking.

The roundup to the Roundup: Getting the pig confident again. Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between October 11 – 18) and not the blog’s main URL. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week. Read the original open thread post here.