Category — Uncategorized

Last time (I think), you have been warned. There are absolutely, definitely huge spoilers in this post for JK Rowling’s The Cursed Child. Look away if you don’t want the play ruined.

I mean it.

This is your last warning…

Okay, coast is clear.

So Voldemort and Bellatrix had a child: Delphi, otherwise known as the Augurey.  She was born right before the Battle of Hogwarts (page 287) at Malfoy Manor.  So… when we saw Bellatrix at Malfoy Manor in Book 7, it was late March.  And the Battle of Hogwarts started May 1st.  So… lets give the woman a few days to recover from giving birth so she can dive into fighting at Hogwarts and assume she delivered in late April.  Which means that she was 8 months pregnant when the trio was caught by Snatchers and Dobby died.  But no one noticed her enormous, pregnant belly?

Fine, fine, so maybe Delphi was a preemie.  But still — belly, right?

Getting that fact out of the way, here’s the thing with this plot twist: It is completely out-of-character for both Bellatrix AND Voldemort.  Neither would seek “immortality” through children; Bellatrix is set up to be the antithesis of her light-haired sister who is obsessed with her child and continuing the Malfoy line.  So she certainly wouldn’t suggest a baby.

And Voldemort?  The man who spent years tearing apart his soul to become immortal?  He certainly isn’t muddying his ultimate plan with children.  It’s even implied that Voldemort didn’t know that he had a daughter since Delphi had to introduce the idea to him on page 286.  So… are we to assume that Voldemort took time out of his busy killing and torturing schedule for a quickie with Bellatrix whenever the itch arose?  Again, doesn’t really sound in character.

At least, not the Bellatrix and Voldemort I know.

And yet the girl clearly can fly.

Anyone else totally thrown off by this plot twist?  Did you find it believable, or were you shaking your head and wishing Rowling had tried something else?

I am telling you once again, you have been warned. There are absolutely, definitely spoilers in this post for JK Rowling’s The Cursed Child. Look away if you don’t want the play ruined.

I mean it.

This is your last warning…

Okay, coast is clear.

My favourite moment in the original series came in book 7 when you learn that Aberforth has been there the entire time.  That Rowling began dropping clues in book 1.  I don’t know why that meant so much to me, but it did.  Best reveal ever.

The trolley witch was sort of that reveal in this book.  Bit character that you’ve barely noticed becomes an immortal witch (hey, why didn’t Voldemort do whatever the trolley witch did to live indefinitely?) hell-bent on getting the kids to Hogwarts.  I’ll never read the Hogwarts Express scenes in the rest of the books in the same way.

BUT.

When they brought up the Triwizard Tournament early in the play, I thought that we were going to find out that Albus and Scorpius were the ones that use the Imperius curse on Krum in the maze.  Wouldn’t that have been brilliant?  Again, something in front of our face the entire time, and we’d finally have an explanation that it was Albus and not Barty Crouch controlling that moment.

But that plot point never happened.  Instead the moments where they went back in time were my least favourite in the play.  Ludo Bagman didn’t sound like himself at all — and why did we never hear him say anything remotely like those introductions in book 4?  The interaction in the maze was unsatisfying.  I didn’t feel like I was going back to the same events from book 4, but rather some messed up memory of those events.  It feel less like time travel and more like a flimsy re-creation.

I really wanted Rowling to use the play to address the story holes that fans have found over the years, but there were few Aberforth-like reveals.  Please don’t misunderstand me; I enjoyed the book, more than I’ve enjoyed a lot of other stories recently.  But at the same time, I don’t think we’ll keep it on the bookshelf in the kitchen with the rest of the series.  It feels a little bit like Pottermore; a fun revisit but ultimately a different beast.

What were your thoughts about returning to events from book 4 inside this play?  Did you enjoy seeing them from a new angle, or do you wish she had left those moments alone?

The twins and I have been in a mad dash with each other to collect business cards from our favourite places.  It began when the Wolvog wistfully took a business card from our pet store during our last visit.  He only confided this after we got home, and I was left to (1) kick myself for not thinking of doing it myself and (2) offer him an exorbitant amount of money for said card.  Josh saved the day by driving back to the store to pick up a few more treats for Truman and business cards for Chickie and me.

Game on.

We gloated about these three business cards for a few days until we got to our favourite hotel and I snatched the last one on the counter.  A-ha!  I was one ahead.  And two if you count the fact that I paid the bill at our favourite Vietnamese restaurant and grabbed two before I signed the check.  (One for me, one for my Chickie, none for the Wolvog who brings his own dinner to the restaurant.)

We all took one from our favourite ice cream place, and I got the only one from our third favourite bookstore.  (The owner handed it to me over the counter while we were chatting, telling me to call her in a few weeks, and I heard the ChickieNob quietly breathe next to me, “Can I have one, too?”  No, you cannot when she doesn’t hear you.)

I am currently in the lead, followed closely by ChickieNob who just obtained one from the vet’s office (but so did I, dear, so did I), and trailed by Wolvog who is too sweet to play in a cutthroat manner.  He always grabs three copies if he grabs one at all.

We only take them from places that mean a lot to us, and it has made life much easier having them lined up on display because… ta da, we now know the phone number of each establishment.  I’m not sure why these little pieces of cardstock make us so happy, but they do.  And we have a shortlist of places we need to visit soon so we can collect more cards.

Do you collect things from special places?

Once again, you have been warned. There are spoilers in this post for JK Rowling’s The Cursed Child. Okay, this particular post doesn’t really contain a huge, plot-revealing spoiler, but if you’re sensitive to spoilers of any kind, SKIP THIS POST.

I mean it.

Really, click away if you haven’t read the play. This is your last warning…

Okay, coast is clear.

So… Professor McGonagall’s childlessness is finally addressed.  I’ve always wondered why the professors weren’t married, and why none had children.  Really?  It seems very strange in the modern world (and a quick Google search tells me that British schools are like American schools in the sense that many boarding school teachers today are married, and often times both people work in the school) to not have one married teacher in an entire school.

Anyway, it was addressed in the worst possible way.  Harry (on page 122) shouts at Professor McGonagall that she doesn’t understand what it means to parent a child because she doesn’t have children.

We don’t have to talk about all the ways that Ron and Harry and Hermione sort of suck in adulthood.  But that moment was such a slap in the face.  While Harry later apologizes for the overall outburst, that line is never addressed again.

I have been on the receiving end of that type of comment, back when I was teaching, before I had kids.  I’ve also been on the receiving end of unsolicited (and, frankly, unhelpful) advice from teachers on how to best parent twins.  So I’ve had it both ways.

And I still sucked in my breath with that line.

Here’s the thing: Until recently, I had a male OB/GYN.  He had never experienced a period or had a pelvic exam, but he still knew more than I did about my reproductive organs.  He was the expert on bodies in general, and I was the expert on my body in particular.  We worked together to best understand my body based on what he knew about everyone else’s body.  No different, in reality, than what a female OB/GYN brings to the table.  Again, she only knows bodies in general, and I still know my body in particular.  It never bothered me to have a male OB/GYN, and I didn’t think I would get anything different out of having a female OB/GYN.

Teachers know children, in general.  Parents know their children, in particular.  Together they bring the macro and the micro together to best reach that individual child.  Both roles are invaluable, and while both can try to do their roles without the other, I think that there is strength in observing the child up-close as a parent as well as far-away as a teacher.

So Harry’s comment is doubly crappy because it not only shits on Professor McGonagall, it dismisses the vital role that teachers play in helping the parent reach their child, as well as dismisses the vital role that parents play in helping teachers reach the very same child.  Two important people coming at the same child from two different angles, with vital information about the child in particular and children in general.

This play, in general, changed how I felt about Harry Potter.  There was just enough space for Rowling to do a lot of damage, but not enough space to clean up that damage and make me love his imperfect self again.  There was no Snape-like redemption.  Just a hollow feeling that we all grow up to become assholes.

Your thoughts?  What did you think about that moment with Professor McGonagall?  Or Harry’s behaviour throughout the play — was he ever redeemed for you?

You have been warned. There are spoilers in this post. Like huge, plot-revealing spoilers. Okay, maybe not this one, per se, but certainly in one of the other posts I’m planning to write. There is a lot to discuss in JK Rowling’s The Cursed Child.

So shall we begin?

Really, click away if you haven’t read it. This is your last warning…

Okay, coast is clear.

First and foremost, I mostly liked The Cursed Child. It was a little rough, sort of in the same way that the Sorcerer’s Stone was a bit rough. Rowling grew as a writer during the series, and I have full faith that if she churned out six more plays, she would become a great playwright, too.

Infertility and childlessness reared their head just as often as parenthood, which was interesting to see — especially in terms of which characters were fertile and which were not.  So shall we begin with Astoria?

The big rumour is that Astoria and Draco were unable to conceive, implying that it was male factor infertility.  Astoria, wanting a child (as well as Draco and Lucius wanting a powerful heir), went back in time using a secret Time-Turner and procreated with Voldemort.  So third party reproduction using donor sperm from the Dark Lord.

Interesting twist but…

Why go back in time for donor gametes?  If all they want were “superior” genes (in the non-Mudblood, Death Eater sense), why not go for donor sperm from one of the Sacred 28 families?  I mean, a Time-Turner seems like a lot of work when there are LeStranges around.

Next, are we really to believe that Voldemort would take time out of his killing schedule to procreate with Astoria at least once, but more likely several times?  I know I’m seeing the world through an infertility lens, but even the most fertile people need more than one bonking to get and stay pregnant.  When did he take a break to have sex with her?  When he was hanging out at Malfoy Manor before the Battle of Hogwarts?

And lastly, I can’t believe that time travel wouldn’t affect an unborn fetus.  I know very little about human cells and even less about the logistics of time travel, but I can’t see moving through time conducive to a healthy pregnancy.  So, again, donor gametes from a nearby wizard seem superior to ones from the past.

And do we really believe Astoria would bypass a cautious route for a dangerous one when we’re talking about a hard-won pregnancy after infertility?  I don’t know about you, but I was pretty reluctant to do anything that could possibly negatively affect the pregnancy (even to a superstitious degree), which I think is a pretty common way of behaving when something has taken so long to achieve.  So… the lack of care seemed a little unbelievable.

Voldemort babies is a plot twist that will bubble up again, so let’s save anything involving the Augurey et al for another discussion.

I guess, for me, the most interesting part was trying to decipher the reaction of the other wizards to this rumour.  Was the issue donor gametes or was the issue that the donor gametes came from Voldemort?  Because the other students tease Scorpius about it — which would point to an issue with the donor gametes themselves — vs. live in fear of him — which would point to an issue with the Voldemort connection.  The other students take it too lightly for the problem to be with the gamete donor.

Which makes me wonder: Why are the students at Hogwarts such dicks about family building?

So discuss: Astoria Malfoy, donor gametes, and the reaction of the other students.