I found Drake’s words on the Alton Sterling shooting incredibly touching: “No one begins their life as a hashtag. Yet the trend of being reduced to one continues.”  I want to cling to his hope because it feels like society is drowning right now.

*******

Truman is about the same.  He’s eating, but he’s losing weight.  He is very frail.  His hind legs are still paralyzed, so he’s sort of slithering around on his tummy, pulling himself with his front paws when he moves, which is not very often or very far.  He can’t really poop unless I massage his belly.  And, at the same time, he is still so Truman-y.  He wheeks the moment I come downstairs in the morning, and positions himself to watch my morning yoga.

I was positive last month that he would never bounce back from the head tilt illness; that we would lose him from that.  And he managed to pull through.  The vet told me to give it until Sunday night.  That if it’s an infection, we’ll see improvement by then.  So I’m hoping this is just another infection and we’ll see a change in the next few days.  Because I cannot contemplate the otherwise.

*******

Stop procrastinating.  Go make your backups.  Don’t have regrets.

Seriously.  Stop what you’re doing for a moment.  It will take you fifteen minutes, tops.  But you will have peace of mind for days and days.  It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

*******

And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “Microblog Mondays: Something to Look Forward to” (My Path to Mommyhood)
• “A Life” (Stirrup Queens) — thank you, Cristy and Jess!
• “3 Things I Learned from the Adoption Process” (Lavender Luz)

Okay, now my choices this week.

My Path to Mommyhood has a post about the commentary people make at certain points in the family building process.  The “it’s too soon!” and “are you still trying that” comments.  Those types of words are salt in the wound of people who are already profoundly feeling the passing of time.  She explains, “When it came time to redo our homestudy, we found ourselves facing several comments, such as, ‘So you’re going to sign on for another year with this agency, huh?’ or ‘What’s causing the delay? Is there something they can tell you about why you’re not getting matched? Shouldn’t you be matched by now?’ or ‘How long are you going to do this?’”  It would be so simple for people to switch their words to ones of encouragement (as she points out in the post) vs. harping on the length of time.  It’s an important read.

The Road Less Travelled has a post marking 15 years of living childfree after infertility.  It’s a wonderful post unpacking her personal journey, but also looking at the greater world of resources out there for those walking the path.  It brings to light an important point about whether or not to add your voice to the blogging mix: The answer is “yes.”  If not to record your own journey for yourself, then to be there for everyone else who is in a place where they so desperately need to hear a “me, too.”

Anabegins cracked me up with the title of her post but kept me reading because it’s just a really good vent.  I love her opening: “Nothing like holidays to cause major FOMO when you weren’t actually invited to any parties, and the fireworks are just too late and too crowded and too loud and were desperately counting down the end of the excess family togetherness but also dreading another looming work day full of annoyances and insurmountable hurdles.”  Go over and give her a hug, and maybe add your own rant.  It feels good to get it out.

Lastly, Hope Floats Among the Cherry Blossoms has a post about a roll of wrapping paper that served as a trigger for her ex-husband’s infidelity.  She so beautifully reflects on where she has been: “My past felt so big and heavy.  I didn’t know what to do with it.”  It’s a post about the moments that continue to affect us long after they’re over.

The roundup to the Roundup: Drake’s words.  Truman update.  Your weekly backup nudge.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between July 1st and July 8th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

To celebrate 500 Friday Blog Roundups (yes, yes, yes, ignore the fact that we’re currently on the 601st Roundup since numbering got messed up at some point), I returned to the archives and yanked out posts from Roundups past — from the first, 100th, 200th, 300th, 400th, and 500th Roundups.  Or, as close enough as I could get to those dates.

It’s interesting to see the same themes pop up year after year — remember this goes back 10 years — as well as which bloggers are still writing.  I went with posts that are still up on the Internet, as well as my thoughts about the post at the time.

So enjoy looking back at 10 years of the ALI community.

From the first Roundup (and the first post I ever highlighted!):

First off, Dead Bug had a great post on Monday about Beginning Day, the transfer day for her daughter who she conceived on her second IVF. It’s the thin silver lining of IF–the ability to know the conception date of your child. Would I rather not know the date AND not have had to jab myself in my stomach with sub-cue needles? Sure. But I do love having the family holiday of Conception Day (which will, from now on, be known as Beginning Day–I love that).

From the 100th Roundup:

I think when you read this post by Bio Girl it will become incredibly clear why I loved it so much. I agree wholeheartedly with the whole post. And it’s an important thing to note: the cushions that exist all around you to fall against. Lucky indeed. I love our community.

From the 200th Roundup:

My Infertility Woes has a post about how she has returned (after a brief hiatus) to liking kids.  I love the distinction she makes as well as her ability to take care of herself and take the time she needs.  It is not an either/all situation–it is merely a response to the moment.

From the 300th Roundup:

Mrs. Spit has a post of wonders.  It is a heart-stopping post, to read what is traveling through her brain in that moment.  And I couldn’t do it justice to describe it.  You need to click over and read it in full.

From the 400th Roundup:

If You Don’t Stand for Something has a moving post marking the 5th year of trying to build her family.  She writes, “5 years.  It should get easier. Or more tolerable. Or you hope that you just become desensitized to it all.  Anything to help cope with it.  But instead, after five years, I still come home crying and breaking down.”  It’s a raw post that lays bare the reality of infertility.

From the 500th Roundup:

Um… like someone could write about Lord of the Rings and not have me mention it?  I love Inconceivable’s deconstruction of the ending of Return of the King and how that truth applies to our own personal walks through Mordor.  Grief changes us.  Stressful situations change us.  We can never go back and find things exactly the same.  Sometimes we need to keep fighting so our new future fits our needs.  It’s a gorgeous post.

Here’s to 500 more.  I would love it if you’d share a link to a Roundup post from the past that got under your skin.

Truman is almost back to normal.  He is eating again, voraciously, which means he is pooping again, excessively.  He is back to his old tricks, like turning over his food dish (well, aren’t you a clever one!) and fighting water bottle (that old nemesis).  Though he seems to now be deaf.

I noticed he wasn’t responding to his name.  He’s usually pretty good about jumping up when you say his name or the word “cookie.”  I waited until he was asleep and then stood behind him clapping and shouting.  He didn’t wake up or flinch.  Which makes me think that he may be deaf.  I’m not sure they have actual hearing exams for rodents.

But his head tilt is gone (mostly), and he’s walking easily.  And did I mention eating?  If he were in charge of the world, there would be unlimited green beans.

*******

Thank you for all the kind words on my blogoversary.  Sometimes I think that I keep writing because I’m so terrible with change that it extends to all things.  Which means you are bound to still find me here 10 years down the line.

*******

Stop procrastinating.  Go make your backups.  Don’t have regrets.

Seriously.  Stop what you’re doing for a moment.  It will take you fifteen minutes, tops.  But you will have peace of mind for days and days.  It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

*******

And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “#MicroblogMondays: Learning to Dance in the Rain” (Searching for Our Silver Lining)
• “#Microblog Mondays: Jemima Puddle Duck” (Torthúil)

Okay, now my choices this week.

The Empress and the Fool has a non-apology for her absence from her blog, a breath of fresh air — full of honesty — about her space.  I especially love this line: “Hello to you, sister-friends. I’m terribly sorry for your grief, as I know it all too well.”  I just really loved this post for its frankness.

My Path to Mommyhood has a post about including ultrasound pictures with an announcement.  She wonders if this was done prior to Facebook announcements, or if ultrasound pictures were — at one point — a private image for close family.  She admits that the reason the image is such a trigger is that “once I had a picture not too different from that one, and it was all I had to cling to when I sobbed and sobbed after the dream was lost too soon.”  The post made me think.

Lastly, as a fellow Googler, I loved The Road Less Travelled’s post about looking for her 8th grade teacher and learning he was gone.  It’s a really sweet post, eulogizing him in a way that she never got to do while he was alive.  It’s a cautionary tale of Googling, and having to be okay with whatever we find.

The roundup to the Roundup: Truman update.  Blogoversary thoughts.  Your weekly backup nudge.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between June 17th and June 24th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

This is the 600th Friday Blog Roundup… which means it’s really the 500th one.  At some point they got misnumbered, and blah blah blah.  But it makes sense.  The blog will be 10 years old soon.  I started doing this a few weeks after I started the blog.  520 weeks in 10 years.  By the time we reach the anniversary for the Roundup, there will be 510 or so Roundups.  Which means there has only been maybe one week per year where I don’t do this.

That is a lot of posts read.  A lot of posts discussed.  Just… a lot of posts.

I’ve said this before, but it’s worth repeating.  This is how I choose the posts for the Roundup each week.  I read.  I read a lot and sometimes I bookmark things that stick with me.  And then on Thursday night or Friday morning, I look at all the bookmarked posts and I choose a few to talk about.  I’ve never accepted a request because… that makes it feel like work.  And it’s not work.  It’s just the words that reached into my brain and stuck with me after I walked away from the computer.

Sometimes they’re not the most profound posts.  Sometimes they just capture an everyday moment so well that it feels worth asking if it resonated with everyone else.  But sometimes they’re verbal symphonies.

I know some people think blogging is in a lull, but I still find little gems every week.  You just have to be willing to look.  You have to be willing to jump from comment section to comment section to find new blogs.  You need to step away from the spoon-feeding of links on social media and dive back into blogs themselves, waiting for a great post to rise up.  It’s sort of like fishing in that sense.

Thank you for providing so many fish over the years.

Here’s to the next 500.

*******

Stop procrastinating.  Go make your backups.  Don’t have regrets.

Seriously.  Stop what you’re doing for a moment.  It will take you fifteen minutes, tops.  But you will have peace of mind for days and days.  It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

*******

And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “A Father’s Advocacy Never Ends” (Stillbirth Matters)
• “The World Outside Is so Inconceivable Often I Barely Can Speak” (Real Life and Thereafter)
• “In Every Sense, Insensitive” (It’s Inconceivable)
• “When the Absence of Hope Is a Good Thing” (No Kidding in NZ)

Okay, now my choices this week.

Um… like someone could write about Lord of the Rings and not have me mention it?  I love Inconceivable’s deconstruction of the ending of Return of the King and how that truth applies to our own personal walks through Mordor.  Grief changes us.  Stressful situations change us.  We can never go back and find things exactly the same.  Sometimes we need to keep fighting so our new future fits our needs.  It’s a gorgeous post.

Grumpy Rumblings has a damn good analogy for finding balance in life.  The post is brief and to the point, so I won’t say much more than that and ruin it.

Kmina’s Blog just celebrated its 7th anniversary, and she muses on the state of the world today as well as a hope for next year.  Again, just a lovely post that is so brief that it would be ruined by more description.  Just click over and read it.

River Run Dry has a gorgeous piece about the shooting in Orlando, her words shaking with rage.  She writes, “Our right to bear arms means our country allows anyone to by an assault weapon, without background checks. It means the CDC can’t even research the causes of gun violence.  And our right to bear arms means that more mothers will sit there, trapped, unable to protect their children.”  It is a must-read for anyone who is shaking with rage over gun violence.

Lastly, Pages, Stages, and Rages has a post about Renee Elise Goldsberry’s speech at the Tony’s announcing her family building struggles to the world.  It was such a profoundly moving moment, and I bawled when I watched it.  Sometimes you just need to see a reflection of your experience inside the greater whole.  Thank you, Renee Elise Goldsberry.

The roundup to the Roundup: The 500th/600th Roundup.  Your weekly backup nudge.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between June 10th and June 17th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

Updated at the Bottom

You may think that the next Roundup is the 600th one, and I get why you may think that. I mean, you know, 600 usually follows 599. But years ago, the Roundups got misnumbered by 100, and it took another year or two before anyone noticed. So the next Roundup is actually the 500th Roundup, which feels more like a milestone number, nu?

I’ve come up with something properly celebratory that I think you’ll enjoy, and I’ve scheduled it for July 1st. Why July 1st? Because (1) I wanted to actually write a normal Roundup for the 500th one, (2) my blogoversary is coming up at the end of June, and (3) the anniversary for the Roundup is coming up in the beginning of July. So mash all those facts together, and I set it for July 1st.

Hope you enjoy it…

*******

Last chance.  This is it.  On sale a few more days.  Life from Scratch has been chosen for an Amazon promotion.  It’s currently only 99 cents — a fraction of a cup of coffee.  So… pick up a copy for yourself or gift to a friend and get your beach reading set?

*******

Stop procrastinating.  Go make your backups.  Don’t have regrets.

Seriously.  Stop what you’re doing for a moment.  It will take you fifteen minutes, tops.  But you will have peace of mind for days and days.  It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

*******

And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• None.  There were no second helpings last week.  Sniff.

Okay, now my choices this week.

Twangypearl the Elastic Girl has an update about parenting after adoption, and getting used to a new normal.  She muses, “Maybe we’re programmed to forget when we have to, so we can be preoccupied by new things? Maybe information that is no longer relevant for your survival is fogged over.”  I especially loved the image she included with the post.

Empty Arms, Broken Heart has a post about being a mum to a 16-year-old boy through adoption.  People assume that she must have been a teenage mother to have a child this old, and she unpacks how she feels about that assumption as well as wonder what to say.  It’s an interesting look at how our brain always goes toward default settings, despite our rational understanding that there are a multitude of ways of building a family.

Lastly, The Road Less Travelled has a beautiful post about how her daughter, Katie, should be about to move off into the world.  Through the years, she has always been able to picture what her daughter would have been doing at each age.  But now, the memory of her daughter moves into an unknown world.  It’s a bittersweet post about how we are always tethered to the living, and how, like all parents, even those who are grieving those who aren’t here, need to release their children to find their own path.  It’s really a gorgeous post.

The roundup to the Roundup: Celebrating the 500th Roundup milestone on July 1st.  Life from Scratch is on sale.  Your weekly backup nudge.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between June 3rd and June 10th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

Update:

Since you asked, the Truman update.  He started wheezing again yesterday morning, so the vet decided to put back in the first medication, since that was clearing up his respiratory problems before we stopped it to take the new antibiotic.  So now he is on two antibiotics, water via syringe, and critical care, a meal supplement.  His breathing is getting better this morning.  And he’s still eating while on the second antibiotic, which is good.  He’s also nudging my hand for a backrub while he eats his critical care, which is also classic Truman. (Why just eat a meal when you can combine a meal AND a massage?)