Category — Friday Blog Roundup

We decided it was a good time to do a little subscription shedding. It’s partially cost — it’s hard to justify a charge if you barely use the service — and it’s partially maintenance. Each subscription brings a slew of emails telling you about all the exciting things streaming that week or reminding you about all the exciting add-ons you can get. I open all of those emails in case there is something I actually need to know from the service. But I will not have to open an email if we no longer subscribe to the service.

We’ll hop back on a service for a month or two to watch a show, but we’re trying to bring it down to the bare minimum of ongoing subscription services.

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Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

And now the blogs…

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But first, second, helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. To read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• None… sniff.

Okay, now my choices this week.

I was blown away by this post from Dear John, where she points out how her husband’s craving for external validation brought on a lot of unhappiness. She writes: “I think therapy would have helped you realize that your failures were a product of your willingness to take chances. That your self-doubt should have been cured by your many, many successes … Contentment is what you should seek, because that’s longer-lasting and stable. You wanted the highs, but found yourself far more entangled in the lows.” While speaking to an individual, she so perfectly captures that gap between the external and internal self. It’s a quiet, heart-tugging post. Go read the whole thing.

Lastly, there is a lot to process inside Road Less Travelled’s brain dump. I liked Elizabeth Day’s Magpie, and I wrote on Goodreads: “I have never felt more seen by a book. She captures infertility perfectly. And far from being a painful read, it was like spending time with a friend who got it.” Guess I now know why. And sending a big hug for the big changes coming to her parents.

The roundup to the Roundup: Backups are good. Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between September 19 – 26) and not the blog’s main URL. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week. Read the original open thread post here.

Even though I continued to post a backup reminder every Friday in the Roundup (see below), the truth was that while I was doing some backups, I was not doing others. When I got back from college drop-off, I wrote out a backup plan that I can follow each week, step by step, that covers everything. I have returned to a thorough backup job. It’s a good feeling.

This is a long way of saying that backups are a good idea, but they only happen if you make a plan and follow it.

*******

Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

And now the blogs…

*******

But first, second, helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. To read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “In Conclusion: My Childless by Marriage Commencement Address” (Childless by Marriage)

Okay, now my choices this week.

No Kidding in NZ asks when caring counts. If you say you care but you never express that care towards another individual, do you actually care? She writes, “I understand that others might have limitations that mean they can’t provide the support we want and need. Even after we specifically articulate what we want and need. But being told that ‘they care’ is really irrelevant, if the person in need of support doesn’t feel that.” It’s an important reminder to show that care if you feel it.

The Barreness has a great post about being invited to a book club while waiting for her car at the mechanic. Book club may require quotation marks around the term. Click over to read what happens at the meeting of bog witches.

Infertile Phoenix talks about why it is difficult to recover. She explains, “One of the many reasons why I grieved so hard and so long for my unrealized dream of raising children is the idea that parenting is so pervasive that it’s the default way of thinking.” She gives the example of a frustrating conversation with her mum.

Lastly, A Half-Baked Life writes about deadheading flowers, a term I know but I don’t quite understand what it looks like in practice. She writes: “I guess in some ways it’s a little zen; don’t get too attached to the flowers, let them go, others will come. But it’s hard to be so ruthless when it comes to the things you love, isn’t it?” This line got to me: “It’s all terribly unfair, this pruning process, when we’re so prone to attachment.” I definitely am.

The roundup to the Roundup: Backups are good. Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between August 29 – September 19) and not the blog’s main URL. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week. Read the original open thread post here.

Just as in past years, I am going to do reruns for a week or two at the beginning of September. The twins are going back to college soon, and I feel myself emotionally burrowing inward. I think about it all the time. It’s the first thing I think about in the morning, and it’s the last thing I think about at night. We’re entering our third year, and I feel the same.

I scheduled posts that you may not have seen in many years (or missed altogether), and I looked in the draft folder and pulled out a bonkers story I never posted. I’ll be back when I feel better.

*******

Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

And now the blogs…

*******

But first, second, helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. To read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• None… sniff.

Okay, now my choices this week.

Apron Strings for Emily has a very moving post, an open letter for World Childless Week to her dog Kirby, who died six months ago. Maybe it’s because Beorn is always on my mind, but this post made me start crying for a dog I never met. I sobbed at this: “Maybe you heard or saw it, but after your last breath, I broke out into sobs. All I kept saying was, ‘My baby! My baby boy is gone!’ I felt my whole world crumble underneath me.” Sending a huge hug over an enormous loss.

Lastly, The Barreness is back with a health update. She needs to be hyper-conscious, and it spills over into every minute of the day. I thought this was profound: “I have found myself looking at people and wondering what it is like to walk in their life, eat what they eat, socialize like they do. I have found myself so much more serious and introspective. I used to identify with Tigger and now I am a cross between Piglet and Eeyore.” Sending a lot of good thoughts to her, too.

The roundup to the Roundup: Super sad about the end of summer break. Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between August 22 – 29) and not the blog’s main URL. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week. Read the original open thread post here.

Last winter, we checked into a hotel and realized that it was attached to a football pitch. As we were getting our key, we asked the woman at the front desk whether we’d be able to see a game from our room, and she looked at our reservation. “Oh, yes, you’ll be able to see half the pitch, and there is a game tomorrow.” This was the best news ever.

Except we were there to do other things, and weren’t going to be near our room during game time. We missed the game, but when we got home, we signed up for Peacock so we could watch the Premier League games.

I told Josh that from now on, all we’re doing is watching games every weekend. I’m sure this will stop by the end of September — I know myself — but right now, it’s footie. all. the. time. Quentin loves it.

*******

Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

And now the blogs…

*******

But first, second, helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. To read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• None… sniff.

Okay, now my choices this week.

Infertile Phoenix has a new job. (Congratulations!) She recounts a conversation with a new coworker about kids, and she writes: “I used to feel so embarrassed by my infertility and ashamed of being childless not-by-choice. Not anymore. Not at all. I’m just living my life. And currently my life involves being excited for my new job working with kids!” Happy news all around.

Lastly, Scientist on the Roof has a super interesting post about going back to the town where she grew up in Latvia after 30 years away. She writes: “Walking around the streets, seeing my old apartment building, the school, the railway station – it was meaningful in ways I did not expect and that I am still trying to process.” Her kids got to see her old apartment building. It sounds like a very moving trip.

The roundup to the Roundup: Football all the time. Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between August 15 – 22) and not the blog’s main URL. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week. Read the original open thread post here.

Josh was away most of the week at a conference. When the kids were little, they always got sick when he went to a conference. Things always broke. There was always… something. Don’t get me started on the time when he was overseas at a film festival, and the local government suggested that we all prepare for a dirty bomb, and I ended up at Home Depot filling my cart with duct tape and plastic sheeting.

Anyway.

Before he left, I thought to myself, whenever Josh goes away, all sorts of things go wrong. I bet I will have to deal with a cricket.

Quentin ended up having an accident in our bed while the ChickieNob and I were watching television (first time ever, which makes me wonder if he was having issues because he was also totally chill, which is not like him), which necessitated two loads of laundry late at night. I was swept up in that strange Facebook glitch, which locked people out of their accounts. (Though I thought at first that it was just me and felt all kinds of panicked.)

There was a salad dressing disaster where I tried a recipe the New York Times promised was the most amazing dressing in the world, wasted a lot of olive oil, and had an enormous clean up, and it was inedible.

And the cricket came on the last night. Our final night. All the cricket had to do was wait a few more hours, and it could have been Josh’s problem. But it wasn’t. It was my problem. And I made it the Wolvog’s problem. He sucked it up in the Dyson, but also got water in the Dyson. So now I’m drying out the Dyson for a few days and hoping it still works.

And these things happen only when Josh goes out of town.

*******

Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

And now the blogs…

*******

But first, second, helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. To read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• None… sniff.

Okay, now my choices this week.

The Road Less Travelled writes about her mixed feelings attending a wedding for a person who is the same age her child would have been. There is the happiness for the couple and the joy of seeing family, but there is the emotional pain of what ifs. It’s a reminder that loss doesn’t magically resolve at a single point. There can be triggers, 27 years later.

Lastly, No Kidding in NZ leans hard on lessons learned through infertility as she experiences a different difficult situation. She asks if you remember going through infertility, when it consumed your whole day and every thought. But one day you reach a point where it is not your entire day. It’s just part of a day. And then it’s only part of a week, a month, a year. She reassures herself and the reader: “It helps me to understand that it will pass, eventually, whatever the outcome, although the fits and starts might last the rest of my life. It helps too to remember the nature of grief, of worry, of irrational thoughts, and know that it is all normal.” Sending a hug and a thank you for this reminder.

The roundup to the Roundup: When Josh goes out of town… Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between August 8 – 15) and not the blog’s main URL. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week. Read the original open thread post here.