Category — Friday Blog Roundup

Truman is doing much better, though the vet ruled that he needs to be on antibiotics for another two weeks.

He was so happy in the car as we drove to the vet, squeaking along to Paul McCartney.  Maybe he thought we were going to the store where we buy his cookies.  But then we walked into the office and he immediately looked at me with terror, as if to say, “Crap!  This place!  Where they squeeze me for an x-ray?”  He went back to being his chill self the moment we got back outside, and he squeaked with ABBA the whole ride home.

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The twins completed the library’s summer reading program and got a free book as a result.  Even though there were no prizes for adults, we were invited to participate, too.  So I’ve been logging my summer reading with the library and got a virtual sticker every time I completed two books.

Um, I really like the stickers.

I remember when we were little that the impetus to do summer reading was that the library would put your name up around the information desk.  There was usually a theme to the program, and the name card was in a special shape.  Once summer was over, you could go by the library and get your name card, but it was a big deal to go to the library and see everyone’s name.  I was the sort of child who needed to go frequently to check my own.

I wish my local library would put my name up at the desk and let people know that I’m doing their summer reading program.  I would like everyone in my town to know that Melissa is feverishly reading books.

But, you know, they don’t have the children’s names up so it would probably be odd if they only had a middle-aged woman’s name scrawled across a beach-ball-shaped name card at the information desk.

Right?

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Stop procrastinating.  Go make your backups.  Don’t have regrets.

Seriously.  Stop what you’re doing for a moment.  It will take you fifteen minutes, tops.  But you will have peace of mind for days and days.  It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “Returning” (Schrodinger’s Catbox)
• “Microblog Monday: Infertility Is…” (Searching for Our Silver Lining)
• “On Being Invisible” (When You Can’t Have Kids)

Okay, now my choices this week.

I love this post by Bereaved and Blessed about getting a sign from her daughter, Molly.  A notification pops up that happens to be from someone with the same name as the daughter they lost years ago.  After a moment of sleep confusion, she realizes that it’s the name of a distant connection.  She writes, “However, it was nice, if even for a moment, to believe that our baby girl wants us to know how she feels about her siblings.”  I like the idea of people being able to communicate with us from worlds beyond.

It Is What It Is (or Is It?) has a tribute to the brother she lost in a car accident when they were children.  It is such a gorgeous post.  The two parts that got under my skin were her musings about all that would be different if not for the accident (“I can’t even conjure who that eleven year old girl would have grown up to be. She is a ghost.”) and the moving conclusion to the post (“And so, it is on this day, brother, a day where I miss you profoundly, that I say thank you.“).

Lastly, A Separate Life has a post about breathing in a moment.  It’s a day when she rightfully could feel otherwise.  She explains, “I can look out the window at my 270 degree view, and take it in, feel gratitude on a day when I don’t really want to feel grateful, and have the comfort of knowing you are all with me on this late winter Wellington morning.”  She finds a small space to be still on the heels of bad news, and she captures the moment perfectly in a beautiful post.

The roundup to the Roundup: Truman is doing better.  I did the library’s summer reading program.  Your weekly backup nudge.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between August 7th and 14th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

I love this story about the 13-year-old girl who did a balloon release on her father’s grave, drove 25 miles home, and found the balloon entwined in her fence.

I love the thought that we can still connect with people after they’re gone. I’m not willing to consider any other possible explanation in regards to this story.

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I also love that this Welsh town has appointed a town jester.  I love the three tasks he had to complete in order to get the job.  I want to live in a town that has a jester.

I served last year as a badchan — a jester for a Jewish wedding — and it was hard work.  I only got to be a jester for a single day, though I wonder if I had mad blindfolded dagger juggling skillz if I could have parlayed it into fulltime work.

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Stop procrastinating.  Go make your backups.  Don’t have regrets.

Seriously.  Stop what you’re doing for a moment.  It will take you fifteen minutes, tops.  But you will have peace of mind for days and days.  It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

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And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• No posts from last week.  What did you read this week?

Okay, now my choices this week.

Persnickety Chickadee writes about all the ways we try to control a cycle despite knowing all the people who get pregnant while eating sushi and doing hot yoga.  I love her point that it’s a form of making a deal with the universe: “Those of us in the TTC circle of hell spend so much time being told what to do and what to avoid, to the extent that it shrivels up some of our life.  But how much of that is needed and how much of it is a form of bargaining?”  Go over and read the whole post.

Today’s the Day I Lose has a great post about coming in last in a race.  While it was about running, it made me think about family building where we use race terminology (“she lapped me”) to describe our feelings of being left behind.  So, yeah, I really loved the message in this post, especially point #10.

No Way to Say It has an impassioned post about Planned Parenthood that is a must-read, especially if you don’t know what percentage of federal dollars goes toward abortions.  A post that sets the record straight.

Lastly, Family Building with a Twist has a post about a friend who wrote a memoir.  It’s such an interesting (er… and nail biting) situation.  She writes: “I realize that she is telling her story, and in telling a story, you whittle and shape it into its tightest, most concise form. I can’t decide what bothers me more: will I be included? Did I make the cut? Did I matter at all in her story? Or will all of the peripheral details, people and ugliness be left out?”  She goes on to ask a lot of interesting questions about who owns a memory more, who gets to shape the way everyone else knows the memory.

The roundup to the Roundup: A message in a balloon.  Welsh town brings back the jester.  Your weekly backup nudge.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between July 31st and August 7th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

Daily Dot killed their comment section. I’ve read their post about it twice, and I still don’t really have a clear picture of why. It seems to be some sort of amalgamation of troll-like comments meets people don’t want to leave comments meets why leave multiple places for people to discuss when they’re talking about the posts on Facebook meets… something else?

All I know is that this fundamental part of blogging — in fact, what made blogging a discussion vs. having someone talk at you — is disappearing.  I don’t just mean the conversation itself; that’s been obviously on a decline as people read from mobile devices.  But this sense of closing the door to conversation.  It would be like someone saying, “Fine, you’re not going to talk?  Then I’m going to stick ear plugs in.”

Whether or not people left comments, it was nice to know the door was open.  Now I just have to write posts about their posts.  Or hunt down the discussion elsewhere.  Or not talk about it at all.

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It’s Harry Potter’s birthday.  Happy birthday, Boy Who Lived.  You’re now 35.

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Stop procrastinating.  Go make your backups.  Don’t have regrets.

Seriously.  Stop what you’re doing for a moment.  It will take you fifteen minutes, tops.  But you will have peace of mind for days and days.  It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

*******

And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “Strokes” (Beyond the Parentheses)
• “Bioethicists in U.S. and Australia Call for Fertility Industry Regulation, More Transparency” (Silent Sorority)

Okay, now my choices this week.

Life and Love in the Petri Dish is doing treatments again, and specifically worrying about her reaction to lupron.  She dreaded taking it, but she isn’t having the same depression this time around.  She writes, “I keep wondering – why is this time so different than my prior two experiences with depot lupron? And all I can guess is that having Magpie means I am so very happy, that plunging me into a chemically-induced menopause can’t shake it.”  It’s an interesting post on how infertility thwarts all of our expectations.

Non Sequitur Chica has a string of random thoughts, and I’m willing to bet that if you click over, you will connect with at least one (though likely more).  For me, it was the piece about playing the pregnancy game.  I do that and didn’t even realize how it’s different between summer and winter.

Lastly, A Woman My Age has a post about her son’s fictive kin cousins, the children of her husband’s best friend.  Seeing her son play with them, she reflects on how much she wanted another child and how much her child wanted a sibling.  It’s a post about an unfulfilled heart.

The roundup to the Roundup: Another comment section closes.  It’s Harry Potter’s birthday.  Your weekly backup nudge.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between July 24th and 31st) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

This is it.  Last day to get Life from Scratch for 99 cents.  Measure of Love is also on sale.  (I believe on all platforms.)  Please help me spread word.

Please Tweet about it. Or throw up the announcement on Facebook. Or email a friend about the sale. Or buy a copy for a friend and send it to them. Or Pin the book cover. Or… Instagram yourself reading the book… I will be eternally grateful.

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How am I wasting time now? With the app WordBubbles. I am really not digging this new trend to offer the removal of ads as an in-app purchase (vs. offering a free and paid version of the same app with ads or no ads), so I haven’t yet removed the ads.  But I am on level 111.  And I like that you get a daily puzzle, to boot.

The game makes me feel smarter than I actually am.

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I found this explanation from author Robert Munsch of Love You Forever to be very moving.

I made that up after my wife and I had two babies born dead. The song was my song to my dead babies. For a long time I had it in my head and I couldn’t even sing it because every time I tried to sing it I cried. It was very strange having a song in my head that I couldn’t sing.

I’ll never read the story the same way again, and I’m so grateful that he shared that story.

*******

Stop procrastinating.  Go make your backups.  Don’t have regrets.

Seriously.  Stop what you’re doing for a moment.  It will take you fifteen minutes, tops.  But you will have peace of mind for days and days.  It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

*******

And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “A Note to Self” (Infertilityhonesty)
• “An Open Letter to My Fertile Family” (Waiting for Baby Bird)

Okay, now my choices this week.

Lavender Luz has another installment of her adoption advice column, and I thought addressing the adopt-a-baby-fast mentality was of utmost importance.  Without shaming the asker, she points out the problems inherent in this mindset, especially in doing what is best for the child.  I especially loved the wedding/marriage analogy.

It Is What It Is has a picture post that packs a punch.  (So much so that I need to write with alliteration.)  With a single image, she speaks volumes.

Inconceivable has a gorgeous post about parenting after a loss, marking the moment of a first unbirthday.  I started to highlight the sentences that made me catch my breath, but really, it’s the whole thing.  It’s the whole, brief, beautiful post.

Lastly, Mom, Eventually has a post about fighting to find happiness.  I love when she explains, “My happiness is like a house of cards – so hard to build and yet so fragile and quick to fall down.”  I think this post will resonate with a lot of people.

The roundup to the Roundup: Please help me promote the Life from Scratch sale.  Waste time with WordBubble.  The real story behind Love You Forever.  Your weekly backup nudge.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between July 17th and 24th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

There is a huge sale this week for Life from Scratch. Starting July 18th (tomorrow) and running until July 24th, Life from Scratch will be on sale for 99 cents. 99 cents! A small cup of Starbucks coffee is more than double that amount. It’s on sale on Amazon, Nook, Kobo, Google, and Apple — yes, everywhere. I would love your help in spreading the word.

So please Tweet about it. Or throw up the announcement on Facebook. Or email a friend about the sale. Or buy a copy for a friend and send it to them. Or Pin the book cover. Or… Instagram yourself reading the book… I will be eternally grateful.

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I’m here at BlogHer, but I wrote this Roundup yesterday before I got on the road. So… while I want to tell you about all that is happening at the conference, it is slow-going typing it on the iPad. Expect an update on Sunday.

In the meantime, the twins went to the White House and reported on the Kids’ State Dinner last week. I’m aware that I am biased and an insanely proud, emotional mother (especially when I think about their beginning months of life and everything it took to get to this age), but I think it’s a great article.

*******

Stop procrastinating.  Go make your backups.  Don’t have regrets.

Seriously.  Stop what you’re doing for a moment.  It will take you fifteen minutes, tops.  But you will have peace of mind for days and days.  It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments in order to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

*******

And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “My Body Image – My Infertile Struggle” (Unpregnant Chicken)

Okay, now my choices this week.

It was a week for beautiful stories and confessions.  Inconceivable! has a post about the embroidered towels she received in a moment when they thought their baby would die, and how she felt when she saw her mother using them recently.  She writes, “It occurred to me how I’d referred to E since the day she’d been conceived, more so once the bleeding started and especially after my water broke. If the baby lived, if she came home, if, if, if. I’d been saving these for that disaster.”  It’s about the if being confirmed and shifting the mind to follow.

Searching for Our Silver Lining has a gorgeous post about being the daughter of a mother with scars, and now being a mother with scars herself.  It is about not repeating what she experienced from the older generation.  She explains: “I was faced with the reality that I needed to find a way to begin healing from infertility in order to save my sanity. Since learning about the existence of the Beats, there’s been even more of an urgency as I’ve worried about repeating the cycle I learned from my mother’s trauma; tainting their lives with the demons that haunt me.”  Weaving in the practice of Kintsugi, she explains her path forward to healing.

So… I’m reading the Listserve this week, and AN IF BLOGGER WAS THE WINNER.  I had already decided to write the person before I got to the end, and then I looked at the name and email address and was like… is it?  AND IT WAS.  I am so happy that R. Sativus won.

Lastly, another post about healing comes from Family Rocks about feeling disconnected.  I think the most eye-opening part of the post was comparing the time she took off after the birth of her sons to the lack of time she took off after incorporating her sibling’s children into her family.  The difference between how we honour the life change of parenthood and how we don’t build that into other situations as people struggle to find their new normal.

The roundup to the Roundup: Please help me promote the Life from Scratch sale.  Twins reported from the White House.  Your weekly backup nudge.  And lots of great posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between July 10th and 17th) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.