Posts from — June 2011

The Prompt-ly listserv is about 24 hours old, and it already rocks.  Fine, the listserv is sort of like a newborn colt, shakily getting to her feet as people shyly get to know each other.  But I can tell that it has the potential to rock and fully expect that within the next two weeks, the prompts and post ideas will be flying like popcorn.

(That is, if you like popcorn.  If you are anti-popcorn, please come up with another analogy in your head.)

I imagine the list like an enormous Formica table at a Starbucks (sans the one wobbly leg that is making your coffee spill all over the surface), with an infinite amount of chairs, and people are just saying interesting things.  They’re talking about things they read and places they’ve been and stuff they’ve noticed.  And your mind just wanders during the discussion, snatching up writing ideas.

I’m finishing up Malcolm Gladwell’s Outliers, which is a massively fun read.  I’ll have more to say about it when I hit the final page (and yes, I have been taking notes because I intend to write a blog post!), but one of the ideas he throws out there is that part of the success equation is the work you put in.  A lot of the success equation is out of your control such as circumstances of your birth or what you were taught at a formative age, but that idea of work is entirely within your control.

The number he comes up with for success is 10,000 hours.  You need to put in 10,000 hours of work in order to be in a position where you become an expert.  The Beatles put in over 10,000 hours of play time before they hit it big; Bill Gates put in 10,000 hours of programming before he was in a position to form Microsoft.

Of course most (any?) successful bloggers haven’t put in 10,000 hours, but I think the idea still holds.  If you want to be a good writer, you need to write.  You need to take whatever writing time you can and write whatever you can.  To warm up for six hours of book writing, I start by writing blog posts (I write to warm up so I can… write).  I jot down words on post-it notes that appeal to me.  I have an idea notebook where I dump ideas.  I read a shitload — both books and blogs.

I may only get 15 minutes a day to write sometimes.  But I grab those 15 minutes and try to make them count rather than dismissing them.  15 minutes of writing still has worth.

And I don’t always post what I write.  I have 172 drafts that I’ve saved.  I have several hundred posts that I’ve written and dumped.  Sometimes, it just about the act of writing.

And that is the way you become a better writer — simply by doing it.  Writing begets writing: do it enough and you’ll have time to work on your book and work on a post because your mind will be in shape.  It’s sort of like running.  If you run once a week, you’ll find every run difficult.  If you run a bit every day, you’ll soon find that a mile feels like nothing.

So, I hope you join along if you’re looking for discussion and prompts.  Because I’d like to see this list become an infinite coffee table with a diverse group sitting around, chatting so you can pluck ideas out of the air.  And my commitment is to grow it into that over the course of this next year.

Think I’ve found my project for this upcoming year of blogging.  Just in time since my blogoversary is at the end of the month.

You have asked for a kick in the ass, and I am going to provide a kick in the ass.  I’ve been mentally tossing around starting this for a bit, but Lacie’s comment was the tipping point.

I am starting a multi-dimensional online writing project.  It’s going to be a listserv as well as random posts.  And it’s called Prompt-ly.

Wait, you say.  I am already part of an online writing group.  Well, this is not actually an online writing group.  If you want to do that, I think you should join the one at Too Many Fish to Fry called the Pomegranate Society (leave a comment in that post to be added to that online writing workshop).  That’s a place to exchange actual pieces of writing and support each other in publishing efforts.

This is not that.

What Prompt-ly is:

• A listserv with blog prompts and other writing project ideas presented by me as well as other members.  In other words, all members can float out a random question that people can use as a diving board for a post (such as: “what is the scariest thing you’ve ever done?”).  There may be one prompt a day or there may be many.  You pick and choose if you want to use them or delete them.
• A receptacle to pass along hot news stories that you think others might like to write about too [this is the listserv].
• An email list where you can debate hot ideas and see if they’re actually post-worthy [this is the listserv].
• A space to send a blog post url and ask for feedback about a post that didn’t get a lot of comments [this is the listserv].
• A space to say: “crappers, I’m about to post this but want a second opinion before it goes live because I’m worried I may offend people.” [this is the listserv].
• And every once in a while, Prompt-ly will be a blog post that will pass along ideas on publishing news or how-to advice, all coming from authors, publishers, editors, and agents.  I’ll collect up questions and answer them.  Or it will simply be a writing exercise or idea to light a brand new fire under your ass [these are the blog posts].

See, listserv and blog posts.

LISTSERV

You don’t need to join the listserv to participate, BUT I have a feeling that the majority of the information will be passed along in that space vs. here on Stirrup Queens.  This is the group’s homepage:

PROMPT-LY

Just click there if you want to join.  All members will be approved in order to keep spam off the list.  The membership request asks you to provide your blog url if you have one.  You don’t need to have a blog to join since some people will be using the list to work on other writing projects such as books or magazine articles.

The list is open, meaning; the majority of members will probably come from the ALI community simply because I am in the ALI community, and I can keep the list ALI-friendly as the moderator.  But anyone is welcome to join: men, women, young, old, gay, straight, talented, and total bores.  By which I mean that I’ll obviously float IF-related news stories to the list, but I also may float something interesting I read on Jezebel that someone might want to use as a springboard to a blog post.

Here are things that are okay to post on the list:

• Blog post prompts.
• Links to news stories or opinion posts that may spark a blog post idea for another person.
• Whole posts you want an opinion on before you hit publish (not everyone will answer you, but hopefully one or two will give you their opinion).
• A link to your own blog post that you’d like some feedback on.
• Questions about writing or publishing.
• Questions about blogging — from the technical side of things such as which software to use to thoughts about social media sites to worries about commenting etiquette.
• Questions about a hot idea that you want to write about but want some feedback on first.
• Personal writing, publishing, or book news.

Here are things that are not okay to do on the list:

• Berate or belittle someone.
• Offer non-constructive criticism.
• Steal another person’s idea and claim it as your own.
• Spam.
• Only use the list to promote your own work without giving back anything to the community by way of throwing out ideas or giving someone else feedback.  In other words, if you’re sending news about your book to the list, you must also participate in other ways such as answering people’s questions.  It’s a community — help has to flow in all directions.
• This is also not a writing workshop (see the link above to Too Many Fish to Fry if you’re interested in that).

BLOG POSTS

The posts will be infrequent (maybe once a month or every other week).  But if you do have specific writing questions that weren’t answered my DIY MFA series, especially ones about the how-tos of blogging, traffic building, of commenting, send them my way in an email with Prompt-ly in the subject line and I’ll answer it in the next post.

So that’s it.  Prompt-ly.  A fire lit under your ass to get you to write more.  Because the only way to become a good writer is to actually do it.

You in?

On Monday, I was looking out the window, waiting for the Fed Ex man, when I noticed that someone had left an enormous black hose over our top step.  Our own garden hose is green, so I knew that it wasn’t someone borrowing our own, but my first thought was that my neighbour must be using our water spigot outside and maybe I should go see if they’re washing their car and get in on the car washing action.

And then the hose started to move.

And I realized that it wasn’t a hose and it wasn’t our neighbour borrowing our water, it was AN ENORMOUS BLACK SNAKE!

I watched in horror as it writhed and slithered on the top step.  From the angle I was at, I couldn’t tell exactly where it was moving, but it looked like it was entering the space between the front door and the screen door.  I flipped out and called Josh, who was about a 45 minute drive away, and screamed into the phone that there is a SNAKE ABOUT TO COME INTO OUR HOUSE AND KILL MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

He actually sounded a little panicked by this news, namely because we don’t live in a snake-y area.  In fact, this is my first time seeing a snake in our area.  The last snake I saw was about two feet long and totally skinny, chilling on the hiking trail in Catoctin.  This snake was between four and five feet long and thick.  Like this.

I called animal control and they essentially told me that they didn’t give a shit because rat snakes are not poisonous.  They told me to open the door and knock it out with a broom.  Are you fucking kidding me?  Can you hear the panic in my voice?  Do I sound like the type of person who is going to open the door?

I ran back to the window, now unable to see the snake, and noticed that two nice missionaries were walking up and down our street, neat shirts and backpacks, knocking on people’s doors.  I was about to open my window and ask if they’d help move the snake when the Fed Ex man arrived.  I hysterically told him through the door that I couldn’t accept my package because there was an enormous snake between my front door and the screen and could he please please please help me?

He opened the screen door and examined the area and told me the snake was gone.  He couldn’t stop laughing as I went outside and looked around the area.  He was right — the snake was nowhere to be found.  It had most likely slithered off toward my neighbour’s house, but that didn’t stop me from watching the front door the rest of the afternoon, just waiting to see that slick body slithering through a microscopic crack in the door (because snakes are boneless, right?  They can squeeze themselves anywhere… I think.  At least the man-eating ones can).

Freaked me out.

*******

Is it just me or has the blogosphere gone enormously quiet and still in the past week or two?  Fewer people reading, fewer people writing, fewer people commenting.  I’ve read blog posts and scrolled down to leave a comment, expecting to see dozens of comments already there since the post was a few days old… and saw two.  I’ve opened my Reader and seen that only a handful of posts have been added though that number is usually enormous.  I know there is the summer slow down, but this feels like something else.  Blogging Listlessness.  Are you listlessly blogging, reading, and commenting?  How can I light a fire under your ass?

*******

And now the blogs…

But first, second helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week.  In order to read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “Sometimes, You Just Need a Good Rant” (From IF to When)
• “It Came in a Rush” (Production, Not Reproduction)
• “Confessional Fridays: Flirting with my Past” (Stumbling Gracefully)

Okay, now my choices this week.

Things Get IF’fy has a banshee scream post about receiving yet another pregnancy announcement, again from a co-worker.  I love this musing on the future: “I wonder if the banshee will ever tone it down to a croak or a sighing moan.  I can see myself at 60 – who knows lucky enough to be a grandmother myself – trying hard to tune out the other grannies boasting about their scores of grandkids.”  Though I think Heather’s idea of an infertile nursing home is brilliant…

Too Many Fish to Fry has a post about the cruelness of the world; about the bitter and the sweet, and she finishes the post with a Pampers commercial that had me bawling.  Watch if you need a good cry (heads up: for a diaper commercial, it is IF-friendly).  TMFtF also has a writing workshop idea so look at her top post as well.

The Misadventures of MissOhKay has a post about unfulfilled due dates; namely why she imagines the size the child would be if she were still gestating yet she never thinks about that child past the due date, into the future.  Today is the unfulfilled due date, and I’m certain that she could use some extra love.

Life from Here has a post about her daughter’s birthday and the various celebrations, all seen through the lens of open adoption.  She writes: “Open adoption is complicated because relationships are complicated. Life is complicated.”  And this post is complicated, but it’s beautiful.  And it is also so clearly filled with love.

Lastly, No Kidding in NZ has a great post that I think deserves a larger discussion which is whether or not one babyproofs their house if they don’t have children (or, I’d add to the idea, if your children are older and you’ve moved along from the electrical-socket-cover stage).  I like what No Kidding does and her thoughts, but others have put good ideas in the comment section as well.  Add your thoughts too.

The roundup to the Roundup: I was almost eaten by an enormous black snake (or something like that).  What’s up with the wave of Blogging Listlessness (are you noticing it too?) And lots of great blog posts to read.  So what did you find this week?  Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between June 3 and June 10) and not the blog’s main url. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week?  Read the original open thread post here.

I got the electric guitar this week — a dark blue and white Fender Squier Stratocaster.  We brought it home and plugged it in and took turns rocking out for an hour.

And then it was time to name it.

All of my suggestions were rejected including Peebles St. Ives (the ChickieNob informed me that “Penis St. Eye” is a terrible name) and Harvey Sweatmachine.  Suddenly, the best name occurred to me — Bob Jackson — and once I said it, everyone in the room agreed that it was the perfect name for the guitar.  Since then, we have only called the guitar Bob Jackson (as in, “where did you put Bob Jackson?” or “Can I play Bob Jackson?”).

The ChickieNob at first didn’t want me to share where the name comes from, but she has since changed her mind and said, “feel free to share this with the Internets.”

A week or so ago, we were watching Free to Be You and Me and the ChickieNob said to me, “when did Bob Dylan die?”

Me: He didn’t.  He’s alive.  He just celebrated his birthday.

ChickieNob: No, Mommy, he’s dead.

Me: Did he die today? (I had been offline most of the day and it was possible that he had died without me knowing).

ChickieNob: No, it was a while back.

Me: Then he’s definitely still alive.  He’s probably touring this summer.

ChickieNob: Mommy, you just have to accept it and stop pretending.  Bob Dylan is dead.

Me: I’m not pretending!  I promise you that Bob Dylan is very much alive.

ChickieNob: Then why did he die when he took all of that bad medicine?

Wolvog: (slowly tearing his eyes from the screen) Are you talking about Michael Jackson?

ChickieNob: (thinking for a moment) Yes, I believe I am.  Is there a difference between Bob Dylan and Michael Jackson?

Me: Yes, there is an enormous difference!

Wolvog: Like one of them is alive and the other one is dead.

ChickieNob: Then let’s switch the question.  When did Michael Jackson die?

Hence how our guitar got its moniker.

Baby Smiling in Back Seat knows just how to push a hormonal girl over the edge.  She sent me this video of Rayna Ford who was pulled out of the audience by Paul Simon to play his song.  As in, he handed her his guitar and asked her to play “Duncan.”

It’s incredibly emotional to watch and by the second minute, I was crying for her, especially seeing her hands shaking and how she found her groove with the song, settled into the melody and her tears of disbelief as Paul Simon walks around right behind her.  Her deep breaths when he touches her back.  It must have been dream-like to be on stage.

It’s such a simple thing — all he did was bring her on stage.  But this tiny action made such a huge impact; obviously in Rayna Ford’s life, but also in all the people who witnessed it and had to acknowledge that every once in a while, dreams come true.

This doesn’t fall into the realm of miracle; this is hardly the meeting place of luck and chance.  This is just a person, realizing they could fulfill someone else’s dream, and then doing it.  There are so many things that are out of our control, the huge wishes that no one can fulfill for us (and I’m certain everyone who reads this blog has one of those in their heart at this moment), but it is no less meaningful when we get a small thing that we want.  It is sometimes enough just to know that another person in the universe heard us and tried to make our dream come true (I still wonder whatever became of Anna Bieniak and her art).

I’ve been asking you since last Thursday to fulfill my dream.  My book, Life from Scratch, is currently in the 200’s on the Kindle list and I’ve been asking for your help to bring it to #1 (which I’ve currently revised to be at least in the top 100) by Tweeting it, Facebooking it, blogging about it, telling your friends.

I know it’s a bit silly; I’m ecstatic with it being in the 200’s and realistically, it’s just a number. BUT every time I see a tweet or someone emails me to tell me that they’ve emailed their friends, it makes this huge difference.  It’s like Paul Simon dragging me onto the stage.  It’s another human being telling me with their actions that they care; that they can fulfill my wish and therefore, they’re fulfilling my wish.  Not because they get anything out of it, but because they care if I care simply because we’re both humans.

So that’s my wish.  There’s still another week of this promotion. (It’s only $2.99!  Less than a beer at most bars.  Less than a movie ticket or a frappuccino or a bag of flour.)  I’d love you to help me spread word and get the book down into the top 100 on Kindle.  It means the world to me and thank you to everyone who has helped so far.

Therefore, I’m going to encourage you to leave a wish and take a wish (if you can).  I’ve already stated mine, but what is yours?  Not the enormous wishes that people can’t fulfill, but the tiny ones.  Who knows what connections lurk out there in the blogosphere?  Which person has a Google alert on themselves who will read your comment and step forward with your request?  Who knows what items a person has lying around their house they could send along? Who wants votes for a contest that you can collect simply by stating your heart.  Is there a post that you wish everyone would read and comment on?

This is really blogging at its best.  Of being each other’s Paul Simon’s yanking each other onto the figurative stage as we read each other’s words.

So which wish of yours can I fulfill?  And can you fulfill mine?