Posts from — October 2009
Anagram
When it comes down to it, this blog couldn’t have been named anything else now that I know that Stirrup Queens is merely an anagram for Pee Squirt Urns.
No, wait. It’s an anagram for Queers Rip Nuts.
Squire Pet Urns.
Quietness Purr.
Requires Punts.
Queers’ Turnips.
Squinter Purse.
Quipster Nurse.
Queens Rip Rust.
Pee Squirt Runs.
Just a small game on a day of rain.
Where I am right now, emotionally:
Blue mood.
Shitty week: rejected friendship and a public reprimand.
Today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.
I am lighting a candle in two more hours.
And I have my period coming soon.
Anagram for “period coming soon”: Iced Mooing Pornos.
Periodic Smog Noon.
Demonic Goo Prison…
Wait. That totally explains the mood. I am getting my demonic goo prison.
Updated:
At least my blog anagrams out to Pee Squirt Urns. Our Family Beginnings becomes A Briefly Noggin Minus. And please, Lori can try to hide it all she wants, but we all know that Weebles Wobblog is just an anagram for Gobble Blows Ewe. Or Bowleg Blob Wees. And Faereyluna (who left the first comment and I’m not sure if she’s okay with me linking to her blog since she didn’t put it in the comment) is otherwise known as Anal Eye Fur. Wait, no, I love her for leaving the first comment and that is not a nice anagram. How about “Ale Year Fun” instead?
October 15, 2009 28 Comments
The 74th Circle Time: The Show and Tell Weekly Thread
Show and Tell is wasted on elementary schoolers. Join several dozen bloggers weekly to show off an item, tell a story, and get the attention of the class. In other words, this is Show and Tell 2.0. Everyone is welcome to join, even if you have never posted before and just found out about Show and Tell for the first time today. So yank out a photo of the worst bridesmaid’s dress you ever wore and tell us the story; show off the homemade soup you cooked last night; or tell us all about the scarf you made for your first knitting project. Details on how to participate are located at the bottom of this post.
Let’s begin.
It just may be the greatest game of all time. It beats out Candy Land, Hungry Hungry Hippos, and even Life.
It’s the Ungame.
The point of the Ungame is to talk about your feelings–my favourite thing to do regardless of whether I’m winning or losing. You move around the board, but there is no place you’re aiming to reach and the game only ends when your mother looks at the clock and realizes that it’s eight minutes until Dallas and by fuck could y’all get in bed already.
With each move, you either land on a space and talk about your feelings (tell us about a time when you were fearful?) or draw a card and talk about your feelings (describe how you’re feeling right now in three words). See, greatest game of all time. And it is only enhanced by imbibing alcoholic substances before playing.
My mother was cleaning out the closet and gave me our copy from the 80s because she remembered how much I loved it. And do I. I’ve even left it in the hallway as a conversation piece for when people come over and see those groovy photographs on the game box. Expect to be seeing a lot of the Ungame on this blog as I play it incessantly.
What are you showing today?
Click here or scroll down to the bottom of this post if this is your first time joining along (Important: link to the permalink for the post, not the main url for your blog and use your blog’s name, not your name. Links not going to a Show and Tell post will be deleted). The list is open from now until late Friday night and a new one is posted every week.
| 1. Weebles Wobblog 2. Parenthood for Me 3. Quiet Dreams 4. Are You Kidding Me? 5. An Unwanted Path 6. Our Someday Family 7. Tales Of A Batty Nurse |
8. S 9. In Due Time 10. Half of a Duo, Raising a Duo 11. Life, Family and the Pursuit of Sanity 12. Sassy IFLady 13. Once A Mother 14. Where the Green Grass Grows |
15. Life and Times of Me 16. Dragondreamer’s Lair 17. Baby Wanted: Apply Within |
- If you would like to join circle time and show something to the class, simply post each Wednesday night (or any time between Wednesday morning and Friday night), hopefully including a picture if possible, and telling us about your item. It can be anything–a photo from a trip, a picture of the dress you bought this week, a random image from an old yearbook showing a person you miss. It doesn’t need to contain a picture if you can’t get a picture–you can simply tell a story about a single item. The list opens every Wednesday night and closes on Friday night.
- You must mention Show and Tell and include a link back to this post in your post so people can find the rest of the class. This spreads new readership around through the list. This is now required.
- Label your post “Show and Tell” each week and then come back here and add the permalink for the post via the Mr. Linky feature (not your blog’s main url–use the permalink for your specific Show and Tell post).
- Oh, and then the point is that you click through all of your classmates and see what they are showing this week. And everyone loves a good “ooooh” and “aaaah” and to be queen (or king) of the playground for five minutes so leave them a comment if you can.
- Did you post a link and now it’s missing?: I reserve the right to delete any links that are not leading to a Show and Tell post or are the blogging equivalent of a spitball.
- If you want it…
I’ve now placed a Show and Tell archive on the sidebar that will be updated each week in case you miss it. And click here for the icon code if you wish to have it for your blog. It links to the archives.
October 14, 2009 16 Comments
Serving Up Cocktails
By the time the next Virtual Lushary rolls around, the Creme de la Creme list will have been started. I know–it’s a little crazy. The chill has just hit the air here. I’m wearing a jacket for the first time since last winter. But if I don’t start it early enough, I don’t get it done. And it’s pretty much my favourite thing I do all year. So I’ve started constructing the opening post and am working on the new icon for this year today.
This will be the fourth list, and that fact alone blows my mind a little. In 2006, it was pretty small–77 posts. In 2007, it had doubled to 160 posts. In 2008, it grew again to 222 posts. My goal this year is to break 300 posts. I would love all 2000 blogs on the blogroll to have a post on the list, and I’m looking to you guys to help me nudge everyone to join along. If you have a favourite post that has appeared on another person’s blog, let them know. Kick each other’s asses, so I don’t have to. The list will open at the beginning of November, so I give you this heads up in case you want to start thinking about it so you can be high-up on the list or hitting publish on a particular post in your draft folder.
The place where I need the most help– and this section always gets the least amount of attention so I’ll say it again and again over the next few weeks–is with blogs that have closed in 2009. Meaning, they didn’t go password protected or on a pause–the author has either removed the blog entirely and has stopped blogging or they have stated that they are done with the site, but are leaving it up. So if you can think of blogs that fit this description (and they ended in 2009–not 2008 or earlier), send them my way or leave the name in the comment section below.
So can we raise a glass of a cream-based drink for the Creme de la Creme list? Because we all have a personal favourite post.
As always, it has been about a month since we met, bitched, cried, comforted, and caught up each other on our cycles and lives. Pull up a seat and I’ll pour you a drink. Let everyone know what is happening in your life. The good, the bad, the ugly. My only request is that if a story catches your eye, you follow it back to the person’s blog and start reading their posts. Give some love, give some support, or laugh with someone until your drink comes out of your nose.
I have a ton of assvice in my back pocket and as a virtual bartender, I will give it to you unless you specifically tell me that this is simply a vent and you do not want to receive anything more than a hug.
So if you have been a lurker for a while (or if this is your first open bar as someone who found this space through IComLeavWe), sit down and tell us about yourself. Remember to provide a link or a way for people to continue reading your story (or if you don’t have a blog–gasp!–you can always leave an email address if you’re looking for advice or support. If not, people can leave messages for that person here in the comments section too). If you’re a regular at the bar, I’ll get out your engraved martini glass while you make yourself comfortable. And anyone new, welcome. I’m glad you found this virtual bar.
For those who have no clue what I’m talking about when I say that the bar is open, click here to catch up and then jump into the conversation back on this current post.
So have an imaginary cocktail and tell us what is up with your life.
October 13, 2009 42 Comments
Unused Names and Other Questions
My parents almost named me something else. They had picked out a different name–something somewhat similar–and were leaning towards it when they realized how kids could make fun of the name. They picked Melissa instead because nothing rhymed with it, it wasn’t the subject of an embarrassing song (unless you count the Allman Brother’s “Sweet Melissa”), and it couldn’t be shortened or lengthened into something disgusting.
They wanted kids to work for their torment-able material.
I mentioned this to the secretary of my grad school program and she immediately responded with “Melissa; she’ll kiss ya. That rhymes.”
And indeed, it does.
Shit.
I’m really glad that they named me Melissa, but I have to wonder how differently my life would have turned out if they had gone with the first choice. Do you believe we somehow fulfill the destiny of our names? Is a Gertrude destined to lead a Gertrude-sort-of-a-life and a Moxie Crimefighter destined to lead a Moxie-sort-of-a-life? Do our names set us on paths with boring names leading to more mundane, traditional lives and edgier names lending themselves to a world of tattoo-sleeves and bungee jumping?
How did your name guide your path?
I think Melissa sounds sweet and feminine and I traditionally use my full name when my hair is down and styled and I’m wearing a hint of lipstick and I’ve actually remembered to wax my eyebrows. I think Mel sounds unpretentious and simple. It’s my day-to-day name. And I am low-fuss. I prefer Chincoteague to Paris, prefer generic canned white potatoes to Belgian fries. I like solid colours, no adornment, little jewelry.
See, I became my name.
Or…wait…did the name become me?
And does that make any sense?
We have a third name picked out for a child. I absolutely love it. Like the others, it came to me one day with absolute certainty that it was the name of our third child and when I said it to Josh, he agreed that it was a perfect name. It honours someone I loved, it compliments the twins’ names, it fits all the same criteria with which we used to pick their names.
And we may never use it.
It isn’t a common name–not even in Israel–so I don’t have many times that I encounter this name on a daily basis except in my head. There is a curve of road that I drive two or three times a week and it always makes me think of this name. Other than that, I can pretty much avoid hearing it or seeing it. It makes the third child seem like it’s composed out of vapours–there is literally no substance there as there would be if we had chosen a future name like Henry or Samantha or something common that surrounds us.
When a child dies, even a pregnancy that ends at six weeks, you can bestow a name. But where do you place the names that are never used because no one is conceived to accept the mantle? This question not only applies to those who live child-free after infertility or stop family building prematurely, but those who discard a name because it felt too connected to a different family building path. What have you done with your unused names? Do you ever encounter them during the day? Do they make you feel like you’ve gotten a warm buzz of recognition or a cold wind of emptiness? What about the ones that you came close to using but discarded for something else? What happens to you when you hear those names?
It’s a strange question to ask because my name is on pause. It is neither used nor unused. By which I mean that we’re at a pause and until we proceed–either forward or sideways–the name is not unused but simply resting.
October 12, 2009 45 Comments
Read Along: Barren Bitches Book Tour #21
Welcome to the 21st tour of the Barren Bitches Book Brigade–a book club from the comfort of your own living room. Grab a cup of coffee and start clicking away at the links below.
Just to explain, this book club is entirely online and open to anyone (male or female) in the infertility/pregnancy loss/assisted conception/adoption/parenting-after-infertility world (as well as any other related category I inadvertently left off the list). It is called a book tour because everyone reads the same book and then poses a question to the group. Participants choose a few questions to answer and then post their response on their blog. Readers can jump from blog to blog, commenting along the way.
Anyone can jump aboard–it’s a book club where you can drop in and out as you wish and all in the community are welcome.
Book: It Sucked, and Then I Cried
Author: Heather Armstrong (a.k.a. Dooce)
Start Date: August 18
Post Dates: October 12
(need an explanation of how a book tour works? Click here to go to a list of posts on the past book tours as well as information about future tours.)
About It Sucked, and Then I Cried…: Obviously not an IF book, but relates to blogging. I’ve seen so many people say they’re reading it that it made sense to read it together. If not sure if her m/c is mentioned in the book, but it is an interesting story AND postpartum depression affects IF women 4 times more than the general population. So an important topic too as it relates to PPD and post-adoption depression.
Barren Bitches Book Brigade List (The blogs below are participating on this current book tour. You’ll be able to jump from post to post to read a plethora of opinions and thoughts on It Sucked, and Then I Cried)
Stirrup Queens and Sperm Palace Jesters (below this post)
The Road Less Travelled
Wild Women of the Universe
Slaying, Blogging, Whatever…
Baby Smiling in Back Seat
Sticky Feet
PCOS Blogger
Desperately Seeking Baby
Even if haven’t read It Sucked, and Then I Cried, you can still add your own thoughts on the blog tour or react to someone else’s critique.
Like the idea of being in a book club without leaving your living room? The current group chooses the next book. The 22nd tour will kick it old school with Norton Juster’s classic, The Phantom Tollbooth. As we did for Harriet the Spy, we’ll be reading this middle grade fiction book through the eyes of an adult and applying Milo’s journey to our own lives.
The Details: Tour #22 will start October 12. Participants will read The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster. On or before December 2nd, everyone will send one question based on the book (to get a sense of questions, click here to see the questions sent for book tour #2) to me. I will compile the questions into lists that will be emailed out to you by December 4th. Everyone will choose 3 questions from the list and answer them on their own blog on December 7th. I’ll also post a master list and people can jump from blog to blog, reading and commenting on the book tour.
If you would like to sign up to participate in book tour #22, leave a comment below or send me an email. I need the title and a link to your blog as well as an email address where you’d like the two or three book club emails sent. If a spouse wants to participate too and he/she doesn’t have their own blog, have them set up a blog solely for book tours (as we did with the Annex) and send me a link to that blog. And if you’re a reader without a blog, now is a great time to set up a space for yourself on Blogger. People will be able to find brand-spanking-new blogs because they will be on the book tour’s participant list. The participants on the The Phantom Tollbooth book tour will choose the book for tour #23.
Happy reading.
October 11, 2009 4 Comments
