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#MicroblogMondays 155: Tinder for Friends

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There is a new site, another Tinder for Friends, in the app store.  Patook works exactly like Tinder, except it’s to find friendships and not relationships.  Unlike Peanut, which I wrote about a few months ago, this one seems to include everyone and not just parents.

Tinder if clearly successful, and people feel comfortable meeting someone to date through an online site such as Match.com or eHarmony.  So why haven’t friendship sites caught on in the same way?  Especially since so many people talk about how they have difficulty meeting new friends in the post-college years?

Would you use an app like this?  Why or why not?

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21 comments

1 Nabanita { 08.14.17 at 5:47 am }

I don’t know. Probably not. But not sure why since I have made many friends after first connecting with them on FB.

2 Keerthi Vydyula { 08.14.17 at 6:12 am }

I tried using tinder couple of times but never really understood it to be frank. Ended up uninstalling as many of them were interested in speed dating and i was bit of an old school so i couldn’t sync with the concept. I dint know about Patook until now. Its interesting to see how it works when there is already well established social media giant like Facebook. I would give it a try to check how it works for sure.

3 Different Shores { 08.14.17 at 7:16 am }

I like the idea of this but it sounds like it has the potential to be a hideous fest of awkwardness. You would probably only ‘click’ with about 1 in 50 people (I say ‘you’, I mean ‘I’ – being a big introvert and averse to smalltalk). In essence it’s a great idea but would be probably be a bit forced, in reality. I think I’d give it a go, though, if the person’s interests were a great match.

4 Inexplicably Missing { 08.14.17 at 7:53 am }

So I’m not so tech savvy and having been in a committed relationship for nearly 14 years I haven’t ever done internet dating… but from what people show me on tindr they just seem to give the person a pretty cursory look and swipe based on physical attraction… Would you really want to use an app where people choose to befriend you in this same swipe concept way? ugh… I think it only works for Tindr and online dating because of physical attraction being a bit more important on people’s priorities for dating… which is questionable I suppose… but I would like to think that looks don’t factor too high for choosing a friend. There’s definitely potential for the internet to help friendship forming but I don’t know if this would be the format I personally would use!

5 Kaeleigh { 08.14.17 at 9:01 am }

I might but i’m a serious extrovert and not akward in really any social setting. Though I worry about the needing to choose based on pictures. I’d be willing to at least give it a try. As a SAHM right now I am in desperate need of more adult facetime.

6 Isabelle { 08.14.17 at 10:22 am }

I probably won’t rely on an app to make friends. I don’t find myself having problems meeting friends, and I don’t even have enough time to keep up with the friendships that I have now. I did make many friends online because of my blog but those friendships are based on common interest and not an intentional click or choice on an app based on a person’s profile.

7 Lori Shandle-Fox { 08.14.17 at 10:59 am }

Probably not. I’m not big on social media for non-business purposes anyway. I guess when you grew up without it, it doesn’t seem like such an essential as if it’s always been part of your life. I’ve also become addicted to the show Catfish which makes me wary about any kind of online relationship.

8 Raven { 08.14.17 at 11:06 am }

I’m not sure if I would – I met Mr. Big on a dating website…but that was a long time ago and I was a different person. I like the idea of finding a new way to meet friends because – making new friends is hard! – but I just don’t know. Meeting someone blind the first time is all kinds of awkward and uncomfortable.

9 nicoleandmaggie { 08.14.17 at 11:18 am }

After having my second child I have found that I have negative interest in spending time with more people outside of work. My introversion cup is completely full. Any more and it would runneth over. (I am aware that I am part of the problem that other middle-aged folks have with making new friends. But I’m probably pretty annoying IRL anyway so they’re not missing much.)

If I did want more social interaction, I would go to more political activism meetings instead of sending DH while I watch the kids.

10 torthuil { 08.14.17 at 11:36 am }

Maybe? I don’t know anything about Tinder, but my husband and I connected on e-harmony. I’m part of some family oriented Facebook groups and I’ve noticed a lot of people just straight up ask for play dates or say they need friends. I might go to one this week. It’s sort of encouraging to me because it shows that lots of people struggle with this and it’s ok to be awkward and just ask instead of depending on some mythical personal magnetism (?). I perceive but don’t necessarily FEEL the need for connection (introversion? Laziness?). My real fear is that soon my daughter will start asking to invite friends to her birthday party and I won’t know any of their parents well enough to ask lol. Since I need to stop building this up in my mind and just act, a practical tool might help. But I already have resources around me; I just have to use them.

11 Journeywoman { 08.14.17 at 12:39 pm }

I might. But I don’t know enough about it–or Tinder to be quite honest.

12 Beth { 08.14.17 at 1:02 pm }

Nope. I’m generally skeptical of this type of app (based admittedly on nothing but paranoia that they will match me with a psycho). Also I’m fairly introverted and generally don’t have the energy or interest in socializing any more than I do.

13 Sharon { 08.14.17 at 1:32 pm }

I can’t see myself using an app like that. Even though I have gone through periods in my life where I have had fewer friends, or a less active social life, than I would have preferred, I have always had a comparatively easy time meeting people and making friends.

I certainly see the utility of it for other people, though.

14 Jess { 08.14.17 at 2:37 pm }

I don’t think so, unless maybe I moved to a new area and had no one I knew there. I met my husband through Match, and that was great because we were both painfully honest in our profiles and met fairly early into each being cajoled into it. I wasn’t super comfortable with the feeling that I was “shopping” for a companion though, although it sure did work out! Interesting concept, it will be interesting to see if it takes off.

15 chris { 08.14.17 at 5:11 pm }

At this moment in my life no, a few years ago? Absolutely! I’m finally somewhere where I have friends, and where I’m making new friends thanks to the ones I have. But, had this been around a few years ago when I was stuck in Arizona, and knew absolutely no one and spent every day feeling miserable and isolated? Absolutely! I met my husband on match.com 20 years ago, long before it was fashionable and I would have no reservations about using a similar app.

16 Lori Lavender Luz { 08.14.17 at 6:14 pm }

Nah. I wouldn’t use. I like the old-fashioned way of finding friends by meeting people at the places where I am, doing the things I do. #getoffamylawn

17 Traci York { 08.14.17 at 6:54 pm }

I can’t see myself using an app like this, because I can’t even imagine (says the old married lady) using something like Tinder. Definitely an interesting concept, though.

18 Middle Girl { 08.14.17 at 7:03 pm }

Not so oddly enough a penpal suggested this app a couple /three weeks ago. I don’t have a problem with it on principle as I have used dating apps (though not Tinder) and other sites like MeetUp to meet people. But I haven’t taken the plunge yet. Time will tell.

19 Chandra Lynn { 08.14.17 at 11:55 pm }

Hmmmm…me? Definitely no. I’m too wary of strangers and carefully vet people before letting them into my life. People can create who they want to be and I’m not sure I’d be able to figure out who’s authentic and who isn’t. But–I also have a lot of friends. Maybe, I’d think differently if I didn’t.

20 Stephanie (Travelcraft Journal) { 08.15.17 at 2:29 am }

I agree with Inexplicably Missing. I think the closest thing to a friendship matchmaking site that people actually use is meetup.com, because you find people based on going to things you’re interested in. When we have new people show up at our craft group (that weren’t invited by a friend), they’ve almost always found us via Meetup, even though we promote the group other ways, too. And they are very often new to the area and wanting to meet people.

21 Vinitha { 08.16.17 at 9:18 pm }

I don’t like the concept of using an app to make new friendships. I do use FB, that is to connect with people I already know from different quarters, but not to make a totally new friend. I am way skeptical to do anything of that sort. 🙂 y the way, haven’t heard about the other two apps, Tinder I have but never used.

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