Eff You, Parents’ Day

Last week, I got a PR pitch for Parents’ Day.  Well, for some product that somehow ties into parenthood that they’ve decided to tack onto Parents’ Day, but you know what I mean.  Parents’ Day.  Have you ever freakin’ heard of Parents’ Day?

I Googled it, and apparently it is a real thing.  I hesitate to call it a holiday because… come on.  But it has been around since the first Clinton administration.  (Like how I did that; assuming that there will be a second Clinton presidency.)

So on the heels of Mother’s Day in May and Father’s Day in June, you have Parents’ Day in July, which parents are supposed to celebrate together.  Clearly this needs to be followed by Parenting Day in August to celebrate the act of parenting (vs. the state of being parents), Being with Kids Day in September to celebrate those moments parents spend with their children, and Time Apart from Kids Day in October to mark those hours when parents and kids are not physically together.

This will take us into the busy winter, kid-focused holiday season which is immediately followed by purchasing cardboard Valentines for your child’s class. (And stuffed animals!  Do not forget to purchase dust-accumulating stuffed animals!)  March can include a celebration of Family Day.  And… oh… just for shits and giggles, let’s throw a Mommyhood Day into April.  How will this differ from Mother’s Day in May?  It won’t, but you will still need to get another card.

And flowers.

I actually have no problem with Mother’s Day and find it a lovely gesture as long as people keep it chill.  And Father’s Day, totally fine with it.  But tacking on ANOTHER parenting holiday that is supposed to just combine the sentiments of the preceding two holidays?  No.  I put my foot down.

Just no.

Politicians, stop signing empty bills that celebrate parenthood and create laws that actually protect and nurture families.  Paid family leave, equal pay, protecting reproductive rights, expanding education access, stopping violence against women — THIS is what we want.

So get on that.