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Thanks, Mental Floss, For Ruining My Childhood

Last week, Mental Floss ran a piece on the Loch Ness Monster.  I am so in love with the Loch Ness Monster (and its various incarnations in other bodies of water, including Chessie in the Chesapeake Bay.  We always, always, always shriek hello to Chessie when we cross the Kent Narrows) that I bookmarked it, wanting to read it as a treat when I was finished with my work.

So much for my treat.  Instead my childhood heart was SHATTERED.

You know who the real monster is?  Mental Floss.

Apparently, the infamous photo of Nessie floating on the water is a fake, snapped by Marmaduke Wetherell to support his earlier debunked animal footprint scandal.  And yes, that is an awful thing to do, but Mental Floss is 10,000 times worse.  Implying that Nessie doesn’t exist, when we all know that Nessie DOES exist?  Because he has to exist?  Because I’m planning a trip to Scotland to look for Nessie so we’re sure as hell going to keep believing he exists?

You know how I know that Nessie exists?  Because it was in the excellent 1983 National Geographic Society’s book, Amazing Mysteries of the World.  Why would National Geographic Society cover it if it weren’t completely true?  Are there grizzlies in Yellowstone?  Snow is Sweden?  Then it follows that there are lake monsters in Scotland.

I am choosing to unbookmark the article and pretend it didn’t happen.

What do you believe in even though you know it’s probably not true?

17 comments

1 a { 10.06.15 at 8:47 am }

Nothing. I am a sad, sad realist. 🙂

2 Ana { 10.06.15 at 9:25 am }

Lol. you are funny Mel. I’m with a, I’m a realist. Have you read Sara Gruen’s book: At the Water’s Edge. Its about this very topic.

3 illustr8d { 10.06.15 at 9:57 am }

I stand with John Lennon and believe in everything unless proven otherwise. We know there are colours out of our range of sight, why not magic? And I used to live & work on the Chesapeake & I believe in Chessie. And Champ of Lake Champlain, the lake dweller of my childhood, teacher of many things.

4 SuzannaCatherine { 10.06.15 at 10:05 am }

I KNOW that I lived in a haunted house in Beaufort, SC. People tell me I didn’t, but I know I did. In fact, a subsequent tenant of that very house INDEPENDENTLY told me of her “strange” experiences there. I rest my case.

I’m also a firm believer in Nessie. I think the fellow who SAID he staged the Nessie sighting and photo, was just trying to get famous by debunking one of the world’s greatest mysteries. After all, who are you going to believe? The National Geographic Society or someone with an already “iffy” reputation?

If I could, I’d be right there with you searching the Loch for any sign of Nessie. ✈️

5 Heather { 10.06.15 at 12:25 pm }

Haha, Nessie! Well I can tell you that dear friend of mine just went Nessie hunting and SAW her. So, forget Mental Floss and their false stories!

6 Sally { 10.06.15 at 2:08 pm }

I always thought Nessie was female! And she definitely exists.

7 Mel { 10.06.15 at 2:14 pm }

This is interesting — is Nessie (and for that matter, all incarnations like Chessie) male or female? I clearly saw Nessie as male. But a lot of people thought female.

8 Sharon { 10.06.15 at 2:19 pm }

So you actually thought the Loch Ness monster was real? Interesting. I always assumed it was just a myth/legend/fictional.

Like “a” above, I believe in nothing and am a “sad, sad realist.” 🙂

9 Cristy { 10.06.15 at 4:19 pm }

Yeah, go here. Specifically, scroll to the end: http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/ancient/legend-loch-ness.html

And I believe Nessie exists.

10 Valery Valentina { 10.06.15 at 5:27 pm }

Nessie. SHE.

11 loribeth { 10.06.15 at 9:06 pm }

Nevermind Nessie, what about the Manipogo?? 😉

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manipogo

12 md { 10.06.15 at 11:52 pm }

reminded me of sara gruen’s ‘at the water’s edge’. lovely book.

13 MinnieK { 10.07.15 at 11:27 am }

I am late to the Nessie conversation, but I too am a believer. In fact, I bought Nessie socks for my upcoming IVF cycle (these ones here: http://www.amazon.com/Sock-It-To-Me-Sockness/dp/B00ECG7ZLA). I tend to believe in everything because I prefer a little magic in my world. And reading Neil Gaiman’s “American Gods” confirmed my desire to believe in things, to make them real. Like Nessie! (Totally real.)

14 Mali { 10.08.15 at 12:05 am }

Yes, I agree with md. If you haven’t read “At the Water’s Edge” by Sara Gruen, you should.

I’m laughing at some of the comments here – Loribeth’s in particular!

I’m afraid I’m a sad, sad realist too.

15 Lori Lavender Luz { 10.08.15 at 8:41 pm }

She.

I can’t think of anything I believe that probably isn’t true. But now I know what may keep me up tonight….

16 Mina { 10.15.15 at 10:34 am }

She. Definitely a she. And just because she is a story, it does not mean that she is not real.

17 Tiara { 10.16.15 at 9:57 am }

Sorry, I am way behind here but I always believed Nessie was a family of Loch Ness Monsters, male & female, having babies & thus why they’ve lasted so long…

(c) 2006 Melissa S. Ford
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