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Seven Years of Pollination

It is the seventh anniversary of the Friday Blog Roundup.  Seven years ago this week, I started doing a roundup of posts I found because I wanted to have a conversation with more people about the things I read.  On average, I highlight four posts per week. (I obviously read a lot more than that, but I grab 4 from the ones I bookmarked.) With very few exceptions (maybe five times EVER), I post 52 times per year.  I’ve done this for 7 straight years.  That is 1,456 blog posts that I’ve highlighted.

Thank you for reading the roundup, but moreover, thank you for clicking over to read what other bloggers wrote.

I miss a lot of good stuff, and I have deep regrets about that.  I’m glad you guys contribute to the “second helpings” section to remedy that.  I also sometimes think about highlighting many more than four posts, but I also know that everyone has limits, and the more I choose to highlight, the less chance that people will have time to click over to read.  So I keep it to four, hoping that is manageable.  And I send a very huge thank you out to the people who click over, read, and comment.

Everyone wants their words, their experience, their emotions to be heard and acknowledged.

I’ve talked a lot over the last 7 years why I don’t like to be called a leader, but I have no problem with being called a chief pollinator.  Someone who spreads around information, bringing people together that they may otherwise have missed, or introducing them to someone who might help.  A connector.  After all, my name means “honey bee” in Greek.  It’s fitting that a Melissa would be a pollinator.

This week will be one of the rare occurrences when I don’t post a traditional Friday Blog Roundup because I’m at BlogHer.  But I hope you’ll take a moment to celebrate this community with me.  Please let everyone know in the comment section one post you read (whether it ever was featured in the Roundup or not) that you’ll never forget.


1 Kasey { 07.26.13 at 8:22 am }

Caroline from Team Harries Beats Infertility wrote a guest pst this week at Faithful Devotions. Its the one post this week that truly stuck with me. Its the story of Sarah- an infertile in the Bible. I never had heard this story before – it really reminded me to keep my faith…something I sometimes have a hard time holding onto.


2 Katie { 07.26.13 at 8:51 am }

This post by missohkay about adoption and magical thinking:


3 Mali { 07.26.13 at 8:58 am }

Melissa, the honey bee. I like that.

Amel, at Serenity in Chaos, wrote a beautiful post about pain triggers, and how she’s coming to see infertility, not as her enemy, but her guru. Inspiring and hopeful stuff.


4 K { 07.26.13 at 9:06 am }

Kasey from Stupid Broken Eggs shared the ‘I am loved’ campaign. Which helps fund the make a wish foundation. My partner was very sick as a child and received a wish (He wished to take his whole family on holiday!), it means more than i think most people realise. So definitely go and share why you feel loved!


5 missohkay { 07.26.13 at 10:38 am }

This post by SRB still brings tears to my eyes:

6 Jjiraffe { 07.26.13 at 12:16 pm }

Seven years! That feels like an auspicious date for the Round-Up. Thank you for doing this project. So many have been touched by the posts you and others have featured. And I hope you are having a great time at BlogHer…

I have an almost perfect recall of blog posts. So many posts have moved me to tears, recognition and laughter over the years. I did a two part series recognizing and thanking the writers of these posts.



If I have to name one: the single, most powerful post I have ever read about infertility is Submerged.


7 Catwoman73 { 07.26.13 at 12:19 pm }

Mel- Thank you so much for all of your efforts! Many of the blogs I read I found because of the roundup! Your Creme de la Creme post from 2012 haunts me, and I find myself reading it over and over again on my worst days, because it reminds me that I’m not alone…


8 Lori Lavender Luz { 07.26.13 at 12:37 pm }
9 Geochick { 07.26.13 at 3:01 pm }

Congrats on 7 years! I can’t even imagine how many posts you’ve read over the years to feature so many.

10 Karen (formerly Serenity) { 07.26.13 at 3:31 pm }

Crap, I was going to post the same one jjiraffe did. Submerged’s post was the post that took my breath away with its power. And heartbreak.

But this one by Mrs. Spit is the post that has stayed with me the longest. Especially now that I do my own wondering.



11 Annie { 07.26.13 at 3:45 pm }

Hi Mel, I just wanted to say thank you so much for all you do. The day I decided to email my blog website to Stirrup Queens was one that changed my life. Through your “pollination,” I have met some amazing women who have taught me so much and given me the courage to keep going.

I’d like to share this post, called “Heaven Will Hold Them,” from the amazing Em at Teach Me to Braid.

12 Rain { 07.26.13 at 5:37 pm }

I am in the process of writing a post about my 4th blogging anniversary (the 27th). And I am in awe of what a strong support network I was able to build because of your and your site! Thank you. Thank you so much!

As for the blog post that I sympathized with this week:

Being in a place of unknowing or “bardo” is so hard!!

13 Prairie { 07.26.13 at 9:15 pm }

I had a post I read and can’t forget but also can’t find anymore & have searched for. It was probably written between Sept -Dec 2012. If was about the Maslow’s hierarchy of needs & how the period if time with a newborn had her functioning way down at the bottom of the pyramid. I love it. If you know where it is or who wrote it, I’d love the link.

14 a { 07.26.13 at 11:13 pm }

I forget everything these days. That’s why I love the Round-Up – there are always reminders of wonderful posts that I already read, and new ones up to expand my horizons.

I adore your love of pollinating. It makes my life so much richer, with little effort of my own. Keep up the good work!

(And since I can’t remember anything, I have nothing to post. I would just post my list of blogs, but that would be annoying!)

15 Kathy { 07.27.13 at 1:20 am }

I am sure there are more than one… I could probably pick one for each of the bloggers I have read most consistently over the years. But this one, of yours, stands out. I especially love it to this day, as the night you wrote it, after I heard the news, I immediately thought of you and your family. I went to your blog to find out if you had written about it and wanted so much to know how you and your son were processing the news. Not only had you written about the news, it remains one of my all time favorite of your’s (and anyone’s) blog posts:


16 Kathy { 07.27.13 at 1:22 am }

P.S. And thank you so much for the Round Up! Though I don’t always click through to read/comment, I love even getting to read your blurbs about what you have chosen and why. I also feel so honored that you have chosen to highlight a handful of my posts over the years. As I have told you before, each time you have done that I have felt like I won an Oscar or something! It means a lot to have my writing validated/appreciated by others, especially you who’s opinion I respect so much.

17 GeekChic { 07.27.13 at 7:34 pm }

I am grateful for your Roundup for allowing me to find other stories to read as I seek to understand the pain of my friends. The one post I will never forget… hmm…

Within the ALI community: http://mrsspit.ca/?p=2253 (because it is so searing and eloquent)

Outside the ALI community: http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.ca/2013/05/depression-part-two.html (because this is the truest depiction of depression I have ever read and I am, unfortunately, quite familiar with the topic)

18 Stacey { 07.28.13 at 3:03 pm }

I just want to say thank you for the round up and for all the pollinating you do. You foster a place of community and connection for all of us in the trenches and beyond. Thank you.

19 loribeth { 07.28.13 at 5:35 pm }

Happy blogoversary to the Roundup! I can’t tell you how many hours of reading pleasure & how many wonderful new blogs to read regularly it has given me over the years — and, as Kathy said, every time one of my own posts has been featured, I feel like I’ve won an Oscar. 🙂 Thank you, thank you, thank you. 🙂

20 Prairie { 07.30.13 at 11:14 am }

I want to publically say Thank You for searing for the blog I remember but can’t seem to find. During BlogHer nonetheless. I very much appreciate the effort.

21 Prairie { 07.30.13 at 12:03 pm }
22 Sarang { 07.30.13 at 3:01 pm }

Thank you, Honey Bee. 🙂

Have been waiting years for the spectacular news below…and to think, babies born 11 days apart to these IF Monkey Sisters. Amazing.

Meg from No Oven for the Bun’s sweet baby Soren born via surrogacy: http://noovenforthebun.blogspot.com/2013/06/he-here.html?showComment=1374810140273#c4880165455907964159

Nikki from Our Roller Coast Ride Through Infertility’s wonderful baby Rowan brought to their family via adoption: http://7yearsandcounting.blogspot.com/2013/07/know-youre-not-alone-im-gonna-make-this.html

Sarang / Lisa W.

23 Tiara { 07.31.13 at 7:43 am }

Oh I wish I could remember just one…as so many times I have read a post from the round up that I otherwise would never have come across & it has moved me or changed me, made me cry or laugh…or both. I usually save your Round up posts for Saturday evenings, after E goes to bed…I look forward to that quiet time I spend clicking around from post to post reading, absorbing…

I often feel like an imposter being a part of this community. I think to myself, “I only miscarried once…I only did 2 IUIs to get my daughter…I don’t belong here.” But when I hear that voice in my head say, “ONLY miscarried” I get angry because that miscarriage rocked me to the core & for my inner voice to minimize that pain is unfair. I haven’t had it as hard as some but I haven’t had it as easy as others either…but that’s not the point, comparing isn’t the point…the point is the support & comradery I have gained. I am a better person for being a part of this community & having my eyes opened to new perspectives…I am a better mother, I am a better daughter, I am a better friend…& this is thanks to you, Mel & what you have put together here. You may not be the leader but for me you are the nerve centre. I come here to your blog & am introduced to amazing people & stories & opinions & perspectives. So happy anniversary (belated, I’m sorry) & my very deepest thanks for you being you & being a part of making me better.

24 Aerotropolitan Comitissa { 08.17.13 at 10:02 am }

Just one post? Impossible. I love your roundup. Thanks for seven years.

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