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Level 70 of Candy Crush…

Level 70 of Candy Crush is the level that almost ended it all. Yes, I’m still playing the game. No, I don’t really want to talk about it.

Okay, I do want to talk about it. I want to talk about the hours I sat trying to get past level 70.  For those who haven’t reached it yet (those who are beyond it are probably laughing at me), it consists of two columns.  In the right column, there are two rows of chocolate being held back by four pieces of candy encased in licorice.  As long as you don’t break the licorice, the chocolate remains in place.  As soon as you break the licorice, you better be ready to make a lot of matches that smash the chocolate.

Candy Crush 70

The best way to clear this level is to make a striped candy out of four vertical pieces of candy.  You then move this candy (without using it) so it lines up with one of the chocolate levels.  You then form a three-way match, and it blasts across both columns, smashing the chocolate out.  You do this twice, and then you can break the licorice and go to town.

The first few times I played it, it was difficult, but I knew what to do, so no problem.  I just need to make those striped candies.  I kept getting close, leaving maybe three squares of jelly unpopped.  By the second day of level 70, I was getting massively frustrated.  I felt like my inability to pass this level was commentary on my intelligence.  Wasn’t this similar to a freakin’ GRE question — one of those ones where you had to predict how many moves or yadda yadda yadda.  It’s been a long time since I’ve taken the GRE, but this felt similar to the type of intelligence measured by the GRE.

I could not predict where the candies would land or set up moves; about 70% of the time, it was a total crap shoot.  Maybe 30% of the time, I could see a move or two ahead.  But even then, things would happen that I hadn’t predicted.  A candy I wasn’t watching would drop into place, causing everything to cascade, messing up my perfect shot.

I was being bested by a freakin’ game.  A GAME.  A game that my eight-year-olds play.  I couldn’t do it, and I started to phone it in, listlessly making whatever combination came up because why bother?  Concentrating hard wasn’t working; maybe randomly selecting combinations would work just as well.  I used up 10 lives that way.

And then, yesterday morning, I decided that I should walk away from the game because it was making me feel inadequate.  Other people had not only gotten past level 70, but they had gotten past all the other levels after that too.  They had probably sailed through level 70 in one try, whereas I had gone through over 50 lives.  I was at the point where I was thinking about rolling up my graduate degree and mailing it back to the university since I obviously didn’t deserve to keep it, and then deleting the app so I could release myself from Candy Crush’s tenacious grip.  But I had to wait for something, and while waiting, I played a round.

And passed.

When those words “sugar crush” came across the screen, I almost cried.  I wanted to take out an ad in our local newspaper and let all my neighbours know that I’m not a no-goodnik, unable to pass a double-digit Candy Crush level.  I passed level 70!  I am a productive member of society.  I can teach the twins third grade math.  I am SMART!

And then I remembered that this isn’t the Scripps Spelling Bee.  This is Candy Crush.  I have gotten myself this worked up over Candy Crush.

So I turned off my phone and returned to working.

[whispered: but secretly, I was smiling the whole day because I’m really really smart because I passed level 70 of Candy Crush!]

108 comments

1 benedicte { 06.20.13 at 7:51 am }

too funy…I feel exactly the same way…i’ve been stuck more than a week on 1 level…horrible…I’m on level 165 now and still completly addicted…

2 Tracie { 06.20.13 at 8:16 am }

My husband just passed 70 two days ago, after several weeks of being stuck on it, and I caught him doing a little dance in his chair.

I keep reaching levels, and thinking they are the worst.lever.ever. And then I will finally pass them, only to get stuck a few levels later on the new worst.level.ever. I am currently sitting still at 149.

3 jodifur { 06.20.13 at 8:23 am }

I was stuck on 167 for a month. I was more excited about passing that last night than I was about passing the bar. I wish I was kidding.

4 a { 06.20.13 at 8:25 am }

Just so you know, you should probably be prepared to encounter this about every 6 or so levels. They are set up in gradients. Usually 1 or 2 before you need a train ticket are extremely difficult to get through. There is no strategic plan you can set up, because what falls is unpredictable. It’s about 95% chance, and 5% being able to recognize the play that’s there when you need it. I’m stuck on I don’t even know what level and I’ve been there about a week. But I can’t play on my phone, so I only play about 5 games a day.

5 Mina { 06.20.13 at 8:27 am }

Ha, everyone seems to be playing candy crysh these days. :-) I got to level 96 without buying or fb-ing anything. Because I do not have time to play it for a longer while, and I hate being a cow to be milked by the game makers. I have it both on phone and tablet, so when I do get time, I can play without buying lives or gimmicks.
I get stuck on a level for DAYS, and it annoys the crap out of me when I get a doughnut with sprinkles and no striped candy to swap it with, so that all the rest of the same coloured candies can turn into striped hard-working, candy wipers too. That makes my day when it happens. How pathetic, eh?!

6 Mary { 06.20.13 at 8:27 am }

Just wait until level 97. I may or may not have actually cried because I. Can. Not. Beat. This. F-ing. Level.

7 Heather { 06.20.13 at 8:36 am }

I’m on level 224, and I agree with the above commenter: there are really hard ones to get through in every ‘world’. That being said I think Candy Crush gives the hard levels to players after a certain time or point. Obviously their goal is to get you to buy add ons and upgrades. I don’t do this, and never will. However, if I’m stuck on a level for a couple weeks and take a break then play a couple rounds? I magically beat the level. There has to be some algorithm in there that calculates time played/time not played/buying of upgrades/etc. before the just give you the pieces you need.
I’m still playing because I have beat those hard levels. However, according to the game makers I’m increasing my chances to buy an upgrade. Which I never will but the game doesn’t know that… or do they…
:)

8 shelli { 06.20.13 at 9:37 am }

Some of the levels just make you want to walk away. I’m on level 273. Every “episode” seems to have that one level that drives you nuts. I have found, as a long term player, persistence is key. I really feel like once you get stuck on a level, the game just grants mercy on you and POOF! onto the next level.

9 Melanie { 06.20.13 at 9:38 am }

Hmmm, the comment above is interesting. It does seen that stepping away from what seems like its freakin impossible level and coming back does work a lot of times. And it’s magically easier and beaten in one try. I don’t want to believe that though! I did finally beat that level on my own darn it!! I remember 70, it was hard. Hate that chocolate. In stuck in 147 now and have been there at least a week.

10 Pepper { 06.20.13 at 9:59 am }

This post makes me laugh and also confirms for me that I cannot start this game. However, it reminds me of my recent accomplishment which was finishing my (albeit very short) run with my daughter in the jogging stroller. We moved to a hilly area (and by hilly I mean MOUNTAINOUS while running with a stroller). There was a short but steep hill that I had to walk every run. And it disgusted me. My internal dialog was not “Go you! You’re out running with your toddler! Keep it up!” It was “You loser. You can’t even run this short distance without walking? You might as well just quit.” And then last week, I did it. And celebrated this tiny victory for the rest of the night.

So although I don’t play Candy Crush, I get it. I really get it.

11 Sarah { 06.20.13 at 11:00 am }

LONG-time reader (secondary “infertility” by husband’s decree – whole ‘nother room for the blogroll), first-time commenter. I wanted to comment on your previous post on your refusal to buy up to Level 36 – I’m still holding out, but when I reach 35, I start over at Level 1 and only let myself “pass” a level when I beat my previous high score (surprisingly difficult! but nice to fall asleep to, because you never run out of lives). But this is the post that brought me out of lurkdom (Candy Crush! For the love! Not years upon years of emotional turmoil, but a game that my FOUR-year-old plays). Your thoughts on the game sooooo completely mirror mine, it’s uncanny. Hilarious, even. And I was never any good at those questions on the GRE, either. Just wanted to say thanks for articulating that. And of course for the years and years and years of anonymous emotional support too. You know.

12 Rachelle { 06.20.13 at 12:17 pm }

Level 65 was that way for me. I called it the devil level. I keep playing because I am addicted!

13 Tiara { 06.20.13 at 1:46 pm }

It amazes me how many people are involved with this game! Very happy for you for passing this level…tho I knew you were really really smart before this 😉

14 Alicia { 06.20.13 at 1:46 pm }

You are hilarious.

15 Elana Kahn { 06.20.13 at 1:48 pm }

That was like level 65 for me. DAYS of trying to pass that one. 70 didn’t give me as much trouble – I must have gotten lucky. But ohhh lordy level 65…

16 Kimberly { 06.20.13 at 1:54 pm }

My husband no longer questions me when I promptly do a fist pump and yell at my phone or iPad “TAKE THAT YOU STUPID GAME”.

And I’m not laughing, but I am curious to see how you will be when you hit some of the levels I took weeks to pass. I’m currently losing my mind over level 361. When I’m not playing, I’m thinking about how long it takes for the lives to regenerate and when I can play again. I’ve never been hooked on a game like this before.

17 Karen Sanders { 06.20.13 at 2:42 pm }

I am on 167. I always pass the sticklers when I’ve figuratively thrown up my hands. Way to go!

18 Stimey { 06.20.13 at 2:48 pm }

I was stuck on level 135 for weeks. Literally weeks. And I was all, “That’s it! I’m done with this game!” and then I couldn’t leave it. When I was playing the game in which I saw that I was, like, 3 moves away from winning and I had plenty of moves left, my heart lifted in a way that was almost indescribable. Now I’m busy hating level 165. Stupid Candy Crush.

19 Kay phelps { 06.21.13 at 12:44 pm }

I am totally stuck on level70. This maybe the end for me!

20 Kay phelps { 06.21.13 at 12:45 pm }

Done

21 Battynurse { 06.21.13 at 2:16 pm }

Lol! I’ve had games like this. Heck, my desk top has a solitaire game that is nearly impossible to beat which I can play for hours.

22 Rebecca { 06.21.13 at 3:32 pm }

I just started playing candy crush last week. Level 50. You are now scaring me with what I’m going to have to deal with!

23 graeme { 06.24.13 at 7:23 am }

of course they know when you are “fed-up”. and you are quite right not to pay.It’s a game……

24 JustHeather { 06.24.13 at 3:31 pm }

LOL. I know this feeling! I am sure I used way more than 50 lives to get past a couple of the levels on Candy Crush. I think the hardest for me was somewhere in the 90’s…I was on that level for at least a week! have fun.

25 KimmieD { 06.25.13 at 1:09 pm }

OMG….. I too feel so dang inadequate as well… over a freaking game… I’ve tried and cried and cried and tried! lol… just joking about the cried but seriously… Level 70 is going to be my demise! I’ve searched for help high and low but to no avail! {{sigh}}.. guess I’ll struggle on… till I pass because I keep failing and that’s not an option! What do I do.. oh what do I do.. :-(

26 51sebastian { 06.30.13 at 4:38 am }

Finally. After 50 odd lives, I did it. And I thought level 65 was difficult. well both are.

27 Lydia { 06.30.13 at 11:03 am }

OMG, I feel so stupid, it feels like an IQ test.

28 Greg { 07.03.13 at 2:14 am }

After mostly coasting through levels up to somewhere around 100, I decided to go back in order to get three stars on each. Then came level 70. I think I’m going on about two weeks. High score…149520. I was devasted watching those dam fish then the explosions and then… “he…could…go…all…the…way….”. Rejected. That one had to be a conspiracy.

29 Danny { 07.08.13 at 12:51 am }

omg this game should be called candy crack ! if im not playing it im thinking about playing it … I’m really thinking i might need an intervention soon lol with all my friends being enablers sending me lives geezzee lol

30 Amber { 07.08.13 at 1:58 pm }

I hate that chocolate, but I’ve found the time bombs to be even worse!

31 May ProblemUterus { 07.08.13 at 8:35 pm }

OMFG LEVEL 28!

32 Elizabeth { 07.09.13 at 11:01 am }

I just spent 16 days on Level 65 – I finally beat it on Sunday. I blew through levels 66-69, however; since yesterday I have been stuck on Level 70. It’s kind of funny that we both had the same thought that Level 70 could be what kills this game for us.

33 Lisa { 07.09.13 at 11:43 am }

70….I hate the chocolate. This may be the death of me!

34 Anne Marie { 07.13.13 at 8:56 pm }

Lol, this forum is killing me with laughter, lol 65 was definitely a bummer but 70 had me chuck my fone at the wall this morning….time to step away from the game for a couple days!

35 Havelock { 07.18.13 at 6:01 am }

Level 70 has been driving me crazy over the last few days. And there seems to be no end in sight. The game makers are smart enough to give a level or two that are easy to keep drawing you in, till you’re lost in candy crush world!

36 Kristina { 07.22.13 at 1:34 pm }

I am in graduate school and I am stuck on this darn level….ARGH!!! I feel as though my intelligence is being tested as well…when I beat it, (and I will) I will definitely do a happy dance

37 AnnMarie { 07.22.13 at 10:46 pm }

Stuck on level 70 after sailing thru 66-69 like many above.
The entire right hand side of the board gets completely covered in the chocolate and i want to cry. My husband thinks I am crazy but then again he is only in level 28! I try to set things up but plain and simple it seems like this level is pure luck in what falls and that is all! Sigh.

38 Pundelina { 07.24.13 at 4:27 am }

Haha, I was thinking about one of your other CC posts yesterday while level 70 whipped me. And now today, I googled candy crush level 70 and look whose blogpost pops up high in the search results! LOL I am ready to delete the bloody game – This is an awful level! But reading all the comments tells me that it is possible :)

39 Kim { 07.26.13 at 9:45 pm }

OMG I had to laugh at all the posts. I’m so glad to know that I’m not the only one. I HATE this game. But I can’t quit. Thanks for the encouragement. I WILL pass level 70! Now if I could just get some work done.

40 becky { 07.28.13 at 6:44 pm }

Candy Crush is evil… this is how they get us addicted to this mess. Make these level so insanely hard that we are seconds away from insanity. Then poof out of nowhere its says sugar crush… on to the next mine blowing level…..

41 Level_Bloody_70 { 07.29.13 at 6:38 am }

I know the game is deliberately designed to get people to buy power ups…but this level really hammers it home. No way of doing this level by using skill. Just shitloads of luck AND skill

42 Level_Bloody_70 { 07.29.13 at 6:40 am }

Yesterday (it was about my 50th attempt..I got down to needing just a single jelly and still had 12 moives left..but of course the game is about as random as an online casino….

43 Level_Bloody_70 { 07.29.13 at 6:54 am }

..there go another 5 attempts…. ARGRGHGHRHGRH

44 Gaye { 07.30.13 at 11:44 pm }

Thanks for the awesome tip – solved it within 5 games, after being stuck for days!

45 Rose { 07.31.13 at 6:51 pm }

I thought level 65 was the worst and now that I have gotten to level 70, it is 100 times worse. I cannot see getting past this level.

46 Renee { 08.04.13 at 12:21 am }

Got to 70 with a lot of aggravation, especially on 65, where unlike the rest of you I bought many lives. (Rationalized it by not buying coffees and less eating out-not.) I yelled at my niece cause she told me about this stupid game. I don’t understand everything and asked her why I had to buy lives to get into new lands or whatever they are called. She told me about the quests. Anyway, I tried 70 twice and didnt get it. Came to this site laughed and thought I’d finish out my lives and delete the game. Went back to 70 and won not even knowing whether to to the right side or left. No real moral, just like the game. A waste of time and purposeless . I will keep on playing without buying lives and delete it when I stuck (probably not.) Maybe the game knew I was getting ready to delete and gave me 70. Ugh

47 Renee { 08.04.13 at 12:21 am }

Got to 70 with a lot of aggravation, especially on 65, where unlike the rest of you I bought many lives. (Rationalized it by not buying coffees and less eating out-not.) I yelled at my niece cause she told me about this stupid game. I don’t understand everything and asked her why I had to buy lives to get into new lands or whatever they are called. She told me about the quests. Anyway, I tried 70 twice and didnt get it. Came to this site laughed and thought I’d finish out my lives and delete the game. Went back to 70 and won not even knowing whether to to the right side or left. No real moral, just like the game. A waste of time and purposeless . I will keep on playing without buying lives and delete it when I stuck (probably not.) Maybe the game knew I was getting ready to delete and gave me 70. Ugh

48 Renee { 08.04.13 at 12:21 am }

Got to 70 with a lot of aggravation, especially on 65, where unlike the rest of you I bought many lives. (Rationalized it by not buying coffees and less eating out-not.) I yelled at my niece cause she told me about this stupid game. I don’t understand everything and asked her why I had to buy lives to get into new lands or whatever they are called. She told me about the quests. Anyway, I tried 70 twice and didnt get it. Came to this site laughed and thought I’d finish out my lives and delete the game. Went back to 70 and won not even knowing whether to to the right side or left. No real moral, just like the game. A waste of time and purposeless . I will keep on playing without buying lives and delete it when I stuck (probably not.) Maybe the game knew I was getting ready to delete and gave me 70. Ugh

49 Renee { 08.04.13 at 12:21 am }

Got to 70 with a lot of aggravation, especially on 65, where unlike the rest of you I bought many lives. (Rationalized it by not buying coffees and less eating out-not.) I yelled at my niece cause she told me about this stupid game. I don’t understand everything and asked her why I had to buy lives to get into new lands or whatever they are called. She told me about the quests. Anyway, I tried 70 twice and didnt get it. Came to this site laughed and thought I’d finish out my lives and delete the game. Went back to 70 and won not even knowing whether to to the right side or left. No real moral, just like the game. A waste of time and purposeless . I will keep on playing without buying lives and delete it when I stuck (probably not.) Maybe the game knew I was getting ready to delete and gave me 70. Ugh

50 Cindy { 08.08.13 at 12:19 am }

Just got stuck on 70 after being stuck on 65 for a week. Love all the comments, I giggled quietly in bed as hubby is sleeping and doesn’t understand why I play this game……in bed…….while the kids are sleeping…….. Anyhow, does everybody know that if you are playing on an iPad you can get your next 5 lives by setting your time setting ahead a couple of hours or a day? I go into the game, get the five lives and then go back and set the time to the correct time. I’ve been playing this way for weeks. Relieves the stress a lot as I know I have as many lives as I want.

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