Random header image... Refresh for more!

A Simple Answer to Your Blogging Question

It circles through the ALI blogosphere, after a pregnancy is achieved, after a child is adopted, after a person decides to stop treatment and live child-free, after a surrogate gives birth, after and after and after all of the afters that follow wherever place your journey began.  Every blogger has a start, a place that is comfortable, a place that they know and others know them, and their blog fits snug around them.

Then the story continues, and you step away from the beginning into the next turn in the journey, and you fear that others will not be able to find you because you are no longer where you used to be.  Where you started.

You ask where you fit now.

You fit into the You-sized space you always fit into.

The one only you can fill.



1 Battynurse { 10.25.12 at 7:43 am }

True. Great post and good reminder at least for me who rarely posts anymore.

2 No Baby Ruth { 10.25.12 at 8:02 am }

A wonderful reminder. Sometimes I have a hard time being true to my heart because I look around and don’t see where I fit. But you’re right – I fit right where I am.

3 Jeanna { 10.25.12 at 8:22 am }

Thanks for this post. I hesitate sometimes to post things because I feel like it doesn’t “fit” with what I’ve posted before. Thanks for the reminder that my blog is my fit, whatever journey that takes.

4 Esperanza { 10.25.12 at 8:35 am }

I love this post. And I SO needed to hear it today. Thank you.

5 Peg { 10.25.12 at 9:16 am }

Such a cool, insightful post. I first came to reading blogs in order to understand and support my sister going through infertility. For some reason, I found that I related to the stories of these blogs. When I started my own blog I didn’t know which blogging community I fit in since I don’t really have the same life experience of those blogs I read the most (despite our adoption). Suprising to me, I have found a community for my blog that has come from all walks of life….even my favorite infertility blogs.

I’m slowly but surely gaining the confidence to just write for me and not worry about “who” might be reading.


6 tigger62077 { 10.25.12 at 9:25 am }

Short, sweet, to the point – I love it. Thank you for reminding us that the space we built is for us and only we can fill it!

7 Meghan { 10.25.12 at 9:26 am }

Thanks for this reminder. I still want to blog but don’t want to become one of the dreaded mommy bloggers. I need to find my voice again

8 Keiko { 10.25.12 at 9:53 am }

Lovely. Needed. Beautifully and simply put. <3

9 a { 10.25.12 at 10:00 am }

Excellent – the only niche you should stuff yourself into is the niche of you!

10 serenity { 10.25.12 at 10:14 am }

Yes. Thank you for posting this: it’s such a good reminder.


11 Valery Valentina { 10.25.12 at 10:14 am }

pregnancy achieved – my clothes don’t fit any longer – step kid drama – some aspects of life don’t seem to fit anymore. new sizes, new shapes, I’m not used to it yet. And hadn’t thought of it as You -shaped. or Me-shaped.

12 KeAnne { 10.25.12 at 11:43 am }

Short, sweet and perfect. For some reason I’m hungry now.

13 Michele { 10.25.12 at 12:28 pm }

🙂 I love this. It’s a great reminder for all of us.

14 Justine { 10.25.12 at 1:06 pm }

I don’t know why, but this made my cry today. It’s comforting.

15 Marisa { 10.25.12 at 1:54 pm }

Thank you. As someone who only opened up about my IVF struggles after I was pg I’ve never really felt like I’ve fit cleanly into the blogging ALI community. My blog is much more about my family but I still struggle with a lot of the pain we went through during our three failed IVF cycles and never know if I should be positing it or keeping it to myself.

16 Mina { 10.25.12 at 2:25 pm }

And this is why you are a good writer and I am not.
I had this post in my mind for a long while. Only it lacked all the nice words and tactful phrasing. Thank you for once again saying so well things I have been thinking about without being able to share them.

17 Lori Lavender Luz { 10.25.12 at 2:35 pm }

This is exactly what we were talking about at our BlogHer12 session, only much more succinct. Blog from your core and your blog will always fit.

Love the You-sized Space.

18 Cristy { 10.25.12 at 2:46 pm }


19 Lacie { 10.25.12 at 2:54 pm }

Thank you. I have so many posts swimming in my head. I needed to know that I still “fit in.”

20 Stupid Stork { 10.25.12 at 4:37 pm }

Accurate as always (thought I haven’t had any.. afters yet).

21 Geochick { 10.25.12 at 4:49 pm }

Well put.

22 Rachel { 10.25.12 at 7:12 pm }

A good reminder not just for infertility, but anything that changes a status (i.e. divorce comes to my own mind).

23 Tralaina { 10.25.12 at 8:14 pm }

I loved that and it is exactly how I am feeling at the moment. What is my after and where do I really fit in.

24 Jamie { 10.25.12 at 9:39 pm }

Very good post and well timed in where I find myself in this journey called life. It seems that some dreams are on a hopeful pause and I am working to embrace the life that is now. Thank you for sharing your insights!

25 Casey { 10.25.12 at 10:29 pm }

YES. Great reminder. Thank you.

26 St. Elsewhere { 10.26.12 at 2:06 am }

I must be pretty awesome, given the fact that this is exactly what I feel. I am me. This is my space. I am here. Here till I want too. Always here, till I want to be here. I am just sitting my square butt in my square hole. 😉

27 Vee { 10.26.12 at 7:26 am }

Thank you. I do struggle with this at times.

28 JustHeather { 10.26.12 at 8:22 am }

Thanks for this reminder! While I know that my blog is mine to do with as I please, and generally do so, sometimes I do have thoughts of where I fit in.
I fit in with myself, except for when I am at odds with myself. LOL

29 Kate { 10.26.12 at 10:24 am }

LOVE this, thank you. How incredibly well said.

30 kateanon { 10.27.12 at 1:50 am }

Thank you for this. I never felt like I fit into a certain niche before. I was TTC younger than my IF peers, then I was doing IVF when those I first started reading / writing with became parents and took a hiatus while I was sick. I still feel like I belong in this community in some way, but you hit the nail on the head. Eloquent, as always.

31 Rhianna { 10.30.12 at 8:02 am }


(c) 2006 Melissa S. Ford
The contents of this website are protected by applicable copyright laws. All rights are reserved by the author