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Goodbye and Hello

St. Elsewhere posted a great question on the Prompt-ly listserv: Are you happy to leave this year behind or more excited at the prospect of the oncoming year?

I have no reason to kick 2011 in the ass.  It was a fine year starting with the fact that everyone in my immediate family and immediate extended family is coming out of 2011 alive.  That fact is sort of my limbo stick for how I feel about a year.  When I can say that (and that circle extends from embryos to close cousins), I feel like the year squeaks underneath.

Beyond that, it was a fairly decent year.  My last book, Life from Scratch, came out in December of 2010, but it didn’t really take off until 2011, so I’m counting it as part of this year (side note, the Kindle version is part of a limited time fill-your-Kindle sale right now for 99 cents).  I started guitar lessons.  I went to the White House and met the President.  The Wolvog received a life-changing email, and I got to speak to my hero again too.

I learned to ride a scooter, purchased Bob Jackson, brought Cozy Jackson Ford into our house, and started Prompt-ly.  We separated the twins for the first time and we all survived (though they do still sleep in each other’s room a lot of the time).  We took them to Disney World.

All in all, a good year.

I sort of always cringe and squint at the next year.  I am terrible at waiting and would love to know what the year will bring.  I sort of wish life were a musical and at the start of each year, you’d get an overture, and you could sort of mentally prepare if you hear a jazzy, happy number that something good might happen, and if you hear a soft ballad, you might be able to steel yourself for some bad news.  Or perhaps having an overture would only heighten that anxiety with waiting; both filling me with even more dread than usual anticipating bad things or more impatience than usual expecting good things.  All I know is that I am certain (if I’m still alive) to be writing a post like this reflecting on the year and anticipating the next one twelve months from now.  And that’s sort of the best I can hope and know.

So how would you answer St. Elsewhere’s question? Are you happy to leave this year behind or more excited at the prospect of the oncoming year?


1 Mic { 12.29.11 at 10:16 am }

For me I think it’s a combination of both. This wasn’t a banner year for me health-wise. Dx’d with Thyroid disease in March (which still is uncontrolled) along with an emergency root canal and emergency gallbladder removal surgery — it was a sucky year.

I changed jobs and realized I jumped the gun and made a huge mistake.

I lost my BFF of 10 years to the aforementioned job snafu.

My mom lost her job.

Yeah, I think I’m ready to kick 2011 to the curb.

Bring it on 2012!

2 a { 12.29.11 at 10:25 am }

2011 was not great and not awful – although there were moments of both. I got to go on a couple trips, which I haven’t done in a while. Those were great. But my FIL died, which is not a good way to end the year. My husband was in Iraq and Afghanistan this year. But he’s been home since July, and his next work location is in Georgia, so that’s good. Our daughter is a consistent ray of light, for which I am thankful (until she decides that 6:15 am is a good time for conversation – not so thankful then).

I love your idea of an overture for each year!

3 lostintranslation { 12.29.11 at 10:29 am }

2011 was not a bad year for me, despite the recent loss of my mother. We were successful in our quest for baby #2, so in that respect it was a great year and since that baby is due in about four weeks, I’m really excited about the prospect of the oncoming year!

4 Kir { 12.29.11 at 10:42 am }

I think it’s been a decent year, except for the state of the economy and money problems (I hate being stressed about money) it was a good year. I’m writing, my blog is expanding, I feel more confidant about that part of my life.
I was overworked this year, I’m tired more often…but all in all My health was better this year than the past few.
the boys are turning 4…and 3 was hard, an adjustment for us…yet the year had us really seeing who our sons “Are” and what makes them tick…I can see the people they are going to be andthat’s amazing to me.

All in all, 2011 was not a bad year at all…and I’m anticipating 2012. Hoping for more GOOD STUFF than bad 🙂

HAPPY NEW YEAR My friend xo

5 Amy { 12.29.11 at 10:57 am }

I can’t wait for 2011 to leave, for this was the year our lives changed – for the worse – forever. It started out pretty so-so and then turned wonderful in May, when we found out we were finally pregnant for the first time after 3.5 years of IF and 10 months of treatments. Fourteen weeks of a difficult but exciting pregnancy turned into tragedy with the second trimester loss of our IUI twins, Aliya and Bennett. This happened in August, and the whole rest of the year has royally sucked. I’m currently 10dpiui with our first treatment after loss and find out on Monday whether we’ll get to experience pregnancy again so soon – even though Jan. 5th will be 5 months since we lost our babies, not long at all (and yet a lifetime, it feels like).

6 MSW { 12.29.11 at 11:24 am }

Although it was a pretty good year overall I’m still more excited about 2012 to start.
We started up a business this year that has been well-received, but any small-business start-up is stressful, and we didn’t turn a profit, although we expect to this year.
We also had a miscarriage and a failed FET, but ended up with a successful FET in the fall. So overall the year was pretty decent, but 2012 should be much better.

7 Sharon { 12.29.11 at 11:30 am }

2011 was a pretty good year for me. I am “finally” pregnant and due in February. My husband and I are happy in our marriage and both still gainfully employed. All our family are healthy and happy. I can’t say too much against this past year.

At the same time, I am really looking forward to the changes and challenges 2012, with the arrival of our twin boys, will bring!

8 Her Royal Fabulousness { 12.29.11 at 11:50 am }

2011 was better than 2010 (the year of my miscarriage and DH’s layoff) but all in all, I am kind of “eh” about it. 2011 did have some non-IF related highlights – trip to Aruba and being published on BlogHer, as well as starting my blog. But, I am hesitant to look forward to 2012 . Every time I get my hopes up about an upcoming year, I seem to be disappointed. But, since it is the year of IVF#1, and I hope to have more writing achievements, I’ll make an extra effort to think positively.

9 JDragonfly { 12.29.11 at 12:07 pm }

The beginning of 2011 was really tough, but the past three or four months have been great. So, my feelings are conflicted about seeing the year come to an end. I’m really looking forward to 2012, as we’re expecting our twins in the spring. I just hope there’s nothing lurking for us around any corners!

10 Hope { 12.29.11 at 12:31 pm }

I always wanted life to be a musical! I love the idea of getting an overture at the beginning of every year, as long as all major life events are also accompanied by singing and dancing and corny costumes? 😉

And if I borrow your limbo stick, 2011 didn’t make it under intact. I lost three pregnancies in the embryonic stage, and my DH lost his grandmother. I hope 2012 has less speed bumps, but I’m in a TTC waiting limbo where I can’t emotionally afford to actually get excited about next year.

11 HereWeGoAJen { 12.29.11 at 1:02 pm }

Eh, it could have been better. But it wasn’t awful. I hope 2012 is a little more cheerful sounding in the Christmas letter though.

12 serenity { 12.29.11 at 1:09 pm }

This question had me pause, really pause. I have NO idea how I feel about leaving this year behind. Because 2011 was a life changing year for me.

Heartache, yes – we are forced to acknowledge that there is no real hope left of another baby for us. No embryos left, no faith left in ART or my own body. I didn’t realize it until now, but I’m terrified of not having that hope that there will be a baby in the future. It means I have to come to some form of acceptance, and I’m still too full of anger and grief for that. It was so much easier to have hope, the chances of maybe in front of us. Now there’s nothing.

But. In 2011? I also ran a marathon – a huge personal triumph for me. O is growing and learning and really at a fun age, with imagination as huge as my love for him. It’s possible that before the year is out J will get a job offer which will make it so that I can scale back my hours and we won’t be as frazzled with the day to day full time working parent stuff.

So I am looking forward to 2012 and what it might bring. I’m scheduled to run 2 half marathons already, one as a rehab race and the other with a goal to break 2 hours. From there I really want to work on speed and set more personal records. We have plans to visit family and maybe Disney World with O this year, do more travel since clearly O is capable on coming on adventures with us. I might get to trade my soul-sucking job for a more flexible one where I can be my own boss and really feel like I’m HELPING people.

Not all bad. But not sure I’m really ready to let go of 2011, either.


13 Rebecca { 12.29.11 at 2:06 pm }

In the end, 2011 has been a banner year. We end it as the second trimester starts with our IVF twins. Much, much better than how it started with an unfulfilled due date in January. I now just close my eyes and hope with all my heart that 2012 will be even better.

14 loribeth { 12.29.11 at 2:23 pm }

2011 wasn’t the best, but it wasn’t bad. There were more changes & more stress at work, which I could have done without. Dh is also under stress at work (reorganization, & all the uncertainty that brings with it). And there are small reminders that my parents aren’t getting any younger (&, for that matter, neither am I :p ).

On the plus side, things seemed to be getting on a more even keel at work towards the end of the year, & I am hoping they will stay that way. Dh has just a few more months until his 55th birthday & pension eligibility, should he choose that option (& the prospect of being packaged off is not unwelcome to him). Our nephews seem to (finally!) be finding their direction in life, and there’s a new baby in the extended family to spoil. : ) So, there are things to look foward to in 2012.

15 Louisa { 12.29.11 at 2:27 pm }

I love the idea of the musical preview, that would be great! 2011 was a fantastic year as we welcomed to birth of our son after 3 years of TCC and one m/c but then 2010 was a really good year too. So I’m looking forward to 2012 and watching our son grow.

16 Amanda { 12.29.11 at 2:45 pm }

This will be the next post for my blog!
2011 was definitely a hard year. Several bad illnesses and 2 miscarriages. However, there were some great times with friends that I will forever cherish. Hoping 2012 brings happiness!

17 Jessica { 12.29.11 at 3:02 pm }

2011 has been the worse year ever. This year we lost our first daughter Emily in April and I have yet to get pregnant again. There were some good things that happened this year, like me starting school again, but it seems as though everything that occured this year kind of stemmed from the loss of Emily so it has been a rough year. I am so excited to leave 2011 behind and start 2012. So many big plans and goals I have. Definitely going to make 2012 memorable.

18 Queenie { 12.29.11 at 3:58 pm }

You know what? 2011 was a pretty great year for me. I’m working at a job I really like, I’m living in a great city, I’ve done a fair bit of traveling to cool places around Europe this year, I’m pregnant with a much-wanted daughter #2, and I’ve been able to watch my toddler grow into this really fun little kid who surprises me and makes me laugh all of the time.

So, I worry about 2012. How can it possibly measure up? And indeed, last week my grandmother was diagnosed with end-stage cancer (because the doctors have missed the diagnosis entirely for the last six months, despite many, many, many trips to the doctor). It’s hard to think I may not have a chance to see her again in person. I’m not ready to face that part of 2012 at all. I’m holding out hope that we’ll get some better news about her prognosis.

But still, I’m trying to focus on the the happy stuff, and I’m still expecting big, good things from 2012: we’re having a baby in March; we’ve got some more cool travel plans coming up; and we’re moving back to DC in the fall, where I’ll be getting paid money to do something I’m really excited to do (and would have PAID money to do!).

19 Mo { 12.29.11 at 4:37 pm }

” I sort of wish life were a musical”
Well said Mel, as usual! 🙂
I am unendingly ecstatic to leave this year behind. 2012 seems to be looking up already, and 2011 for me was a complete nightmare.

20 Delenn { 12.29.11 at 8:41 pm }

Generally speaking this year has had more downs than ups for me and my family. On the one hand, my husband got a job he really likes and is really well regarded. On the other hand, I lost my job. On the other hand, I got to spend time with my kids. On the other hand, financially, we are struggling. And a host of other big, small, enormous, insignificant things in between. I really am not thrilled with this year as a whole, but there were parts that were memorable and I hate to see time go. But I want things to get better in 2012. I want things to change.

21 KnottedFingers { 12.29.11 at 11:57 pm }

Passing into new years is hard for me. I’m happy that my children and I survived 2011. However my grandfather and fil did not. Also each year that passes and we get further and further away from 2007 I feel like I’m leaving behind my daughter who died.

Each year the memories aren’t as sharp. I don’t remember what it felt like to hold her. I don’t remember what she smelled like. I don’t remember how her cry sounded or the exact tilt of her nose.

I feel like with each year that goes by I lose something special and it makes my heart hurt.

(although I’ve been in tears tonight and in not a good place and so I’m weepy. Sorry)

22 Journey Girl { 12.30.11 at 4:00 am }

2011 has been a bit like Forrest Gump’s box of choccies, I never knew what I was going to get. It started with my hubs out of work and mine not willing to take me back for the same money after I’d been on maternity leave. We’ve had our baby’s first birthday (combined with my 40th, blech). My husband ended up getting a job he is great at and hopefully he is on track to winning a free trip to Hawaii for us, whoo hoo. I ended up getting a better job than I had and more pay and now have another upgrade on the job! Then we saw a failed cycle in Thailand and our darling boy get Kowasaki disease. 2011 ends with me on my own in Bangkok for a FET transfer on New Years Day which will hopefully give 2012 a fabulous start (as well as our son hopefully being cleared of heart damage in late Jan). Yeah, a real mixed bag.

23 Heather { 12.30.11 at 4:02 am }

2011 was a good year for me. I was at first not happy to be doing a laparoscopy, but it all worked out for the best when 3 months later we conceived. Being pregnant is just wonderful. 2012 is going to be even better since I will be meeting my little one. I just have some trepedation about how this is all going to work with work.

24 Mali { 12.30.11 at 4:38 am }

2011 has had its ups and downs. We had a fantastic trip to Europe and Turkey a few months ago, but career-wise there was a bit of a set-back. I’m looking forward to see what 2012 will bring in that context – whilst being a bit scared about it too. I also have some trepidation about the coming year, as my mother is aging and things are only going to get worse. On the bright side, there’s a family wedding in Phuket earlier in the year, and another trip later in the year somewhere special for a … ahem … significant birthday of my own that is coming up.

25 Bea { 12.30.11 at 5:52 am }

2011 was busy – good-busy. 2012 will be similar in that sense, I think. Am I happy to leave this year behind? Well, yes, but not in a good-riddance type of way, but in a satisfied type of way. I kind of feel like I used 2011 up nicely and am ready to move on and start the next one.


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