Random header image... Refresh for more!

Southwest Airlines, Leisha Hailey, and the Mini Pretzel Conundrum

Last night at dinner, we were talking about a friend of mine who opened up an online store for same sex weddings.  The ChickieNob wanted to know why anyone would need a separate store when there were perfectly good bridal shops.  The ChickieNob is a connoisseur of pretty things and likes to visit bridal shops as well as jewelry stores in the same way that other people like to visit art museums or the zoo.  We explained to her the term “discrimination.”

“Actually,” I told her, “something happened just this week on Southwest Airlines.”

The ChickieNob sucked in her breath because Southwest Airlines both disseminates her favourite mini pretzels AND is guilty of kicking the object of her affection, Billie Joe Armstrong, off an airplane a few weeks ago.  When they went for Billie Joe, it shook her, but the mini pretzels had such a grip on her heart that she was willing to accept someone being kicked off for saggy pants.  But when we told her about the Leisha Hailey and Camila Grey, you could see the little wheels turning in her head.  Suddenly she had a hard choice to make — was she going to enjoy the mini pretzels others bring her from their Southwest Airlines trips or was she going to take a stand against discrimination and forgo munching on salty snacks?

Because, when it comes down to the line, in the ChickieNob’s world not only should everyone be allowed to kiss; in fact, everyone should kiss.  More is better in her world: more brides, more grooms, more kissing, more snuzzling, more loving.  I hope she never loses that thought; I hope she never becomes cynical and stops thinking that love is the greatest thing in the world.

“I don’t understand how Southwest Airlines makes such good mini pretzels but then kicks people off their planes,” she told us, hoping for an answer that would allow her to still eat the pretzels while supporting other human beings.

“I know,” Josh said dryly, “you would think that people so skilled at choosing airplane snacks would also be open-minded about all human beings.”

The ChickieNob has decided that she’s going to hold off on consuming Southwest Airline pretzels and see what happens in the future.  How they handle things.  She’s willing to give second chances if it means getting to eat the pretzels again, but for now, she thinks we should take a different airline.  But damn, is that little girl missing her salty snacks.  Please, Southwest Airlines, pull your shit together and prove that part of being a “family airline” is being respectful of ALL families.


1 Peg { 09.28.11 at 10:23 am }

Absolutely laughing out loud! Thanks for the funny post and highlighting the absurdity of the southwest incident. Through the eyes of babes…

2 Quiet Dreams { 09.28.11 at 10:27 am }

I *heart* that ChickieNob. She made my morning.

3 Lori Lavender Luz { 09.28.11 at 11:17 am }

“more kissing, more snuzzling, more loving”

Yes, ChickieNob, yes!

*Snorting* at Josh’s reply.

4 Nikki { 09.28.11 at 12:15 pm }

I have been reading your blog for awhile. I have to say that the stories you share about your awesome children is helping make a decision I didn’t think I would need to. I wasn’t sure if IVF would be worth it but reading this blog really tells me that it is so worth it. Thank you.

5 a { 09.28.11 at 12:21 pm }

That ChickieNob is a smart girl with a good moral base.

And Southwest Airlines is not doing itself any good lately.

6 Eggs In A Row { 09.28.11 at 1:52 pm }

Well. If you ever need any proof that you are raising your children correctly, let’s see: your son has an invisible board instead of an invisible friend (mine, for instance, was guilty of trying to push my baby sister’s cradle down the stairs…), and your daughter is willing to give up snacks in favor of equal rights for gay couples. I’d say you win Parent of the Year.

7 Meghan { 09.28.11 at 2:04 pm }

I love her innocence and Josh’s reply! Sometimes I think kids should run the world…they get the big picture. Plus I bet there would be better snacks…mini pretzels for everyone!

8 Esperanza { 09.28.11 at 2:23 pm }

Your kids are so wonderful. Thank you for sharing all these moments of discovery and contemplation. They are truly to be treasured.

I hope you explained to her how hard these decisions can sometime be. My partner and I were planning on getting married right when Prop 8 passed in California, declaring same sex marriage unconstitutional in our state. We decided that we didn’t want to enter into what had become a discriminatory institution but its hard because we really want to get married! So yeah, I know how hard those decisions can be, do you stand up for what you believe in, or do what makes you happy? Definitely hard decisions.

9 Bionic Baby Mama { 09.28.11 at 7:18 pm }

i love this post. and that chickie nob. she wins.

10 loribeth { 09.28.11 at 7:57 pm }

Chickie Nob rocks. : )

11 Kristin { 09.28.11 at 10:01 pm }

I <3 ChickieNob

12 Lollipopgoldstein { 09.28.11 at 10:05 pm }

Before y’all think too highly of her, she did inquire this afternoon if anyone other than Southwest Airlines had those mini pretzels. The girl wants her treat. She’s standing her ground, but she informed me that she hopes they fix this for the sake of her pretzels.

Oh, and lest you think we’re parents of the year, I didn’t include the screaming match we all got in on Monday over homework. Definitely not parents of the year — just human.

13 Baby Smiling In Back Seat { 09.29.11 at 12:47 am }

ChickieNob is awesome.

There are all sorts of mini-pretzels on the market. One of them has to be comparable to SW but also free of gay (and obese, and saggy pants) discrimination.

Nikki’s comment: wow. And it is absolutely worth it.

14 endoandbeyond { 09.29.11 at 2:24 am }

Well said ChickieNob!

15 Mo { 09.29.11 at 7:41 pm }

Your kids are adorable. Seriously.

16 magpie { 09.30.11 at 11:19 am }

i love this. i have no idea who billie joe armstrong is, but i love this.

surely there are other mini-pretzels in the world?

(c) 2006 Melissa S. Ford
The contents of this website are protected by applicable copyright laws. All rights are reserved by the author