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334th Friday Blog Roundup

Josh wanted me to do an April Fools Day Roundup linking all the blog posts listed below to porn.  And I told him I wouldn’t.  Not because I love you and respect you, but because I hate April Fools Day.

After I wrote that paragraph, I read it aloud to Josh who commented that it made him sound like he knew anything about Internet porn.  In actuality as I write this, Josh is reading War and Peace on his blackberry. (His goal was to read the longest free book he could find on the smallest Kindle screen.)

I’m not sure I just elevated your opinion of Josh with that last thought.


I’m just going to be honest here: I fucked up this entire week.  I didn’t get anything accomplished that I wanted to get accomplished.  The house is a wreck — piles of random papers on the kitchen table, toys across the living room floor, unfolded laundry.  I’m phoning it all in at the moment.  ChickieNob asked me if I wanted them to clean up the living room and I said, “nah.”  What sort of person tells other people not to clean up their clutter?

I didn’t practice guitar enough.  I got frustrated with the song I was working on and pretty much quit because it was making me feel like a loser.  I’m sure I’ll regret that action at my next guitar lesson.  I ate like shit when I ate at all.  I ate french fries for dinner one night.  I meant to make a protein with them, but I didn’t.  My email inbox is overflowing.  I didn’t replace guitar practice, cooking, or returning correspondence with anything amazing.  I couldn’t really tell you where this week went.

I don’t even know why I told you all of that except that it simply felt good to unload it.


Most people know of my fear of mayonnaise — it is even part of my BlogHer profile because it felt like it was pretty much the most important thing someone should know about me.

Yesterday, I encountered a post on BlogHer about mayonnaise and I had to tweet about it.  So I closed my eyes and thought about England (isn’t that what you’re supposed to do during situations such as LH-surge sex and tweeting about mayo?) and wrote it.  And Lori saw and came back with this:

[blackbirdpie url=”http://twitter.com/LavLuz/status/53629223776169985″]

Could not stop laughing.


Instead of the Weekly What If: what food item would you banish from this earth if given the power?

You might think I’d say mayo, but I’d actually choose chocolate-covered crickets because that would rid the world of crickets too.


And now, the blogs…

Stumbling Gracefully has an interesting post about aging that gave a lot of food for thought.  In the first part of our life, we work towards all of these goals, and in the second part of life, we simply… well… live those goals.  It’s the ever after — whether it is happily or not.  And it’s her explanation at the end of how to relive the roller coaster or the forging of new roads (of creating your own new goals) that resonated with me.

Life of the Barely Sane has a post about open adoption and medical records.  About seeing your child ill and not having the answers to questions asked, and how that feels.  It is a post simply about the importance of knowledge — not just because it gives us information that can push us towards a solution, but because information can also make us feel settled.  And sometimes that is equally important — to know answers to yourself or to be able to provide them to a child.

CD1 Again has a post about defining family and a conversation she has with her step-daughter.  She explains that she needs to convey: “I’m her step-mom and I don’t want to take her mother’s place when she’s with us. I’m her friend, one of her parents, and someone who loves her very much. But at the same time, I have to make her understand that I would love to have been her mom, lest I make her think I don’t love her like a mom.”  I think what struck me is this idea of — within any relationship — wanting more.  I have certainly felt it as well as what she writes about how these relationships knock at the tender spot in an infertile woman’s heart.  It’s a post worth reading and thinking about.

Lastly, Empty Whole records the a-ha moments that took her out of mourning the end of the cycle.  The first is really interesting especially in regards to risk and what odds we would need to lay out that money on a cycle (vs. taking it to Vegas!).  But the second one just made me smile since I also read those signs and often hope they’ll somehow provide the answers I need.  And the one she passed is a damn good reminder.

The roundup to the Roundup: No April Fools joke here.  I really wasted this week.  I can’t believe I had to tweet about mayonnaise.  Answer the Weekly What If.  And lots of great posts to read.


1 HereWeGoAJen { 04.01.11 at 8:20 am }

Whoa there. If banishing chocolate covered crickets rids the earth of crickets, does it also rid the earth of chocolate?

I’d banish cilantro, obviously.

Sometimes I have weeks like that too, where nothing goes right, but nothing huge goes wrong either. It just ends up being too much.

I hate April Fools Day because I am so gullible (wait, let’s go with trusting instead) that I believe anything anyone tells me. This year I think I am going to hit anyone who plays an April Fools joke on me.

2 Mel { 04.01.11 at 8:37 am }

Jen raises a good point. I ‘d hate to risk seeing chocolate go too. Therefore, I am banning pan-fried crickets. I could stand to lose everything pan-fried if it got rid of crickets.

3 Chickenpig { 04.01.11 at 8:48 am }

PEAS Pea soup pea puree pea pods pea green sugar snap peas PEAS. NO MORE PEAS.

Sadly, my little girl loves them. 🙁

4 April { 04.01.11 at 8:49 am }

I would have to banish ham. And maybe onions as well. Both turn my stomache when I smell them, see them, or even think about eating them.

5 BigP's Heather { 04.01.11 at 9:00 am }

Good Lord, my stomach churned just typing that out.

6 lis { 04.01.11 at 9:19 am }

bananas, and peaches in syrup

maybe i wouldn’t ban bananas from the earth, just from being eaten/thrown away near me *shudder*

mel, how do you find the blogs for the round up? do you do that much reading or do you have recommendations coming in?
just curious.

7 Tigger { 04.01.11 at 9:39 am }

Peas. Can’t stand ’em. Thankfully neither can my husband, so I don’t ever have to eat them, but I should probably introduce my child to them. I’m afraid he’s going to LIKE them though – blech!

8 It Is What It Is { 04.01.11 at 10:47 am }

We are absolutely sisters from another mother on the m*yo thing (see, I can’t even type it, it disgusts me THAT much).

And, I beg to differ, you did get something accomplished this week. If you have laundry to FOLD that means you DID laundry.

9 JuliaS { 04.01.11 at 10:54 am }

Canned peas. I like em fresh, I like em frozen – I will vomit if I have to even think about eating them from a can. I even like split pea soup – but there is just something about a can of greyish green mushy orbs that just gives me the heebie jeebies. I wouldn’t even give the jarred kind to the kids when they were babies. Just wrong. That was a lot to say about it. LOL!

Hmmmmmm – I am trying to decided if I think War and Peace on kindle is elevation worthy or not? I really like books – how they smell, the feel of the paper and turning the page. Especially the turning the page part – it’s so thrilling! What am I going to find when I flip to the next page?? So, for classics – definitely go tech free. THAT impresses me much!

(PS – I am going to re-read “Atlas Shrugged” – I am so excited! I found my ratty dog-eared paperback this past week . . .)

10 Magpie { 04.01.11 at 11:17 am }

I detest mayo, the kind that comes from a jar. But truth be told, the homemade stuff is a completely different animal.

11 Kristi { 04.01.11 at 11:35 am }

You seriously need to write a book about your life. No offense but it’s hilarious or your hilarious. You hate mayo I’ve never heard of that or banishing crickets only to get rid of crickets.

I would banish Peas. I’ve already told DH our little girl will never be asked to eat peas by me I just can’t subject her to the horror of them.

12 Tara (TIMO) { 04.01.11 at 11:48 am }

Bananas, hands down. Could eat them before the boys but pregnancy and beyond has caused them to be blech. Even the smell can induce that yucky stomach feeling. It stinks because Nav eats a banana every morning and wants the boys to eat them more often. But I just can’t do it.

I like Josh, but you can keep him. War and Peace on a Blackberry? Crazy.

13 a { 04.01.11 at 12:04 pm }

If I didn’t think people read this on their work computers and could possibly get in trouble, I would think Josh’s April Fool’s joke was the best one ever! (Probably because it sounds like something I would suggest – not do, because I don’t pull pranks, but suggest, because I like to stir up trouble through other people). Also, I read parts of Ulysses on my Blackberry. It was painful.

I don’t know what your problem with mayo is – it’s just whipped oil. Obviously, oil is your friend if you’re eating French Fries! Although, in my old age (41), I’m losing my taste for mayo. And Ranch dressing. And most fruit makes my mouth itch. I don’t really like much of anything right now except for steak that someone else cooked, chicken, burgers, baked potatoes, fries, chocolate, and baked goods. I suspect this attitude will not be good for my physique or heart health…

14 geochick { 04.01.11 at 12:16 pm }

And I thought reading Sherlock Hoolmes on my iPod was a huge undertaking. Josh is crazy.

Mayonnaise, hands down. I hate that crap.

15 Sharon { 04.01.11 at 1:37 pm }

I am not a big mayo fan myself and avoid eating it, but the only food I’ve ever eaten that literally turned my stomach was roe. So I would banish it from the earth if I could. . . except I think it’s fish eggs, and you can’t very well banish fish eggs without banishing fish as well. Bah.

16 Wordgirl { 04.01.11 at 2:24 pm }

Josh & G would get along — for him it was free books on the ipad — and he settled on Brothers Karamazov. (?!)

I am trying really hard to think about what food I would ban. You know I”m not a fan of chicken. I eat it because its a lean protein and blahblahblah — I was a vegetarian for a long time and have been thinking again for a myriad of different reasons of becoming one again — and one of the reasons is the smell of raw chicken which just makes me gag. As the family cook though of a family of non-vegetarians — it wouldn’t solve anything…

17 Esperanza { 04.01.11 at 3:36 pm }

I also fucked up this entire week and I’m also phoning it in. Here’s to phoning it in! WHOO HOOOOOO! The worst part is I don’t even have intentions of getting on top of shit this weekend. That is how far gone I am.

Thanks for including me on the round up! Makes my whole month I swear to you!

18 April { 04.01.11 at 3:39 pm }

Thank you for including me in the round-up this week. It really means a lot to know that someone is reading.

I have to agree that I’m phoning it in for this week and probably the weekend as well. It’s been too long since I did that so I think I will.

19 Carrie { 04.01.11 at 3:53 pm }

I think Josh had a creative thought, but you would have some massive spam. LOL!

20 JJ { 04.01.11 at 8:40 pm }

Be gone from this earth, green peas!

21 aisha { 04.01.11 at 9:37 pm }

I’m sorry you’re having a tough day/week 🙁 Thinking of you.

22 Chickenpig { 04.01.11 at 10:28 pm }

Power to the pea haters!!!

I also want to ban liver. All liver…chicken livers, pate, calf liver, liverwurst…yak! There isn’t enough bacon, onions, cheese, garlic or anything else to make that crap edible.

23 Missy { 04.02.11 at 1:23 am }

Bacon. I get nauseated by the smell every time. It looks like human flesh and I hate how it wrinkles up when it cooks.. I’m sure every man in the world would love to see me banished just for picking bacon.

24 jjiraffe { 04.02.11 at 2:47 am }

Yay!!! Someone else was crazy enough to read “War and Peace” on their phone! I got pneumonia last year and got stuck in bed with nothing but my phone, so I started re-reading it. (I tried to read it when I was 13, which, yeah.) I loved that book so much I would marry it in Vegas.
I can’t get anyone else I know to read it and I’m dying to talk about it. Maybe you can post his thoughts on it when he’s done. (In a year. Longest book ever?)

I would ban sandwiches. I hate them. But then everyone would hate me, because everyone likes sandwiches. Except me.

25 Tara { 04.02.11 at 4:06 am }

Raisins…& prunes ’cause they just look like big raisins!

26 JourneyGirl { 04.02.11 at 6:41 am }

Mushrooms, definitely – the smell makes be dry retch – blech.

27 OroAtWork { 04.02.11 at 3:46 pm }

Lima. Beans.

28 mrs spock { 04.02.11 at 11:45 pm }

I loathe all sea life with a writhing passion,but I suppose banning every aquatic life form from this earth would probably cause catastrophic ecological collapse.So- I guess I will wrinkle my nose and continue to avoid Red Lobster.

29 mrs spock { 04.02.11 at 11:46 pm }

I am also shocked by how many people hate green peas.

30 Aramelle @ One Wheeler's World (Linky) { 04.03.11 at 2:27 am }

Somehow, I didn’t know of your hatred of mayo. It’s okay, I’ll love you anyway (LOVE me some mayo!).

I would love the opportunity to get rid of all lobster and crab. Just seeing someone eat those things makes me sick to my stomach.

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