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The Delurkification of You

For the second year running, I have managed to remember International Blog Delurking Week BEFORE International Blog Delurking Week was over.  Which, in my world, is a major feat.  You see, the first full week of January has traditionally been International Blog Delurking Week (I’m looking to see how many times I can use the full name in a sentence), and since I am always focused on the Creme de la Creme, I usually forget all other things.  Such as showering.  And packing pants.  And International Blog Delurking Week.

Except that I have remembered, and my reward is that you have to delurk.  I think it’s something like … a law.  By which I mean, what is like a law, but the police will not enforce it?

Okay, so if it’s not a law, then we can at least all admit that this is worldwide holiday up there with all the other worldwide holidays … such as International Harry Potter Reading Day.  And International Font Loving Week.

So happy International Blog Delurking Week and in honour of this worldwide holiday, please delurk because there is a huge discrepancy between the number of readers in actuality and the number of readers I actually know are reading. Or a tongue-twister like that.

It is fairly easy. Leave a comment in the comment section below admitting that you’re here. You can simply raise your hand and meekly admit that you’re here with a simple, one-word “here” comment; or you can proudly raise your hand and tell us all a bit about yourself (my preferred method); or you can tell me what type of cookie you’d be if you were a lump of cookie dough (see, I’m trying to make it easy for you by even providing a comment prompt). The point is that I want to know about the people who read me.

And that’s all you have to do to celebrate.

Oh!  And the first of what will be a few giveaways for Life from Scratch just went up in the blogosphere.  Click over to win your own copy


1 Gail { 01.05.11 at 8:12 am }

I’m here. I’ve been reading your blog for about 6 months now and have been slowly going through the Creme de la Creme posts. They are fantastic and I can only imagine how long it took you to go through them all. Thanks for doing this. It feels good to know that there are other women out there like me as I struggle through unexplained IF.

2 Runny Yolk { 01.05.11 at 8:24 am }

I’m here as well. I’ve been reading for a couple of months (right around the time I started my own blog). Your post yesterday inspired me to sign up for BlogHer.

3 SurlyMama { 01.05.11 at 8:40 am }


Been stopping by for about a month. Stumbled upon you accidently. Very thankful that I did. Love what you have done with bringing people together. Until I found your site I thought I was the only single girl in the world trying to get pregnant on her own. Also love how you organize the posts. I have a very boring job where I can literally sit and surf the internet for up to 7 hours a night. The ICLW and Creme de le Creme have given plenty to keep myself occupied.

4 Devon { 01.05.11 at 8:45 am }

I’m here! Reading everyday. Comment every so often. Haven’t updated my blog in a VERY long time!

5 Amy { 01.05.11 at 8:48 am }

I’m here. I read often, comment not-so-often. I’m on the other side of infertility now… my family is complete after 6 years, 7 pregnancies, 5 losses, and 2 amazing little boys. But I’m still passionate about infertility. I can’t figure out how you do what you do, but you do it well!! Keep up the good work!

6 loribeth { 01.05.11 at 8:49 am }

I’m here. : ) Have been blogging for just over three years, reading you regularly for about four, I think. Living childless/free after infertility & loss for almost 10 years now, but still feeling the reverberations, and the connection to the ALI community.

7 Find My New Normal { 01.05.11 at 8:55 am }

I’ve just recently started reading you blog. So far I like what I see. I may even enter myself in your Creme de la Creme contest.

8 Shannon { 01.05.11 at 8:58 am }

I’m here. I read a lot of the blogs. I faced a very “easy” infertility problem compared to most of you all and am very humble with all of your experiences. I believe it helps make me a better mother knowing what you all are going through and what could have easily have been my path. I suffer from PCOS and Amenorrhea. I have successfully, but not easily, gone on to have 3 little boys, nicu, bed rest, surgery. I am now one of your audiences biggest silent cheerleaders out there!

9 Megan { 01.05.11 at 9:06 am }

Hi! I’m here as well! I’m Megan- mama to three. Our youngest is adopted from Africa. I appreciate all the info you put out there :-)

10 Ann { 01.05.11 at 9:14 am }

Here. And terrible at commenting. Huge failing of mine, perhaps because I don’t have a blog of my own, so I don’t personally experience the frustration of people stopping by without comment? Anywho, I’ve been reading your blog for 1.5-2 years, before we even received our diagnosis of unexplained fertility. Stumbled upon it because someone had linked it as a blog they read. Tons of testing, a failed IVF, and an adoption homestudy later, I am officially an urban legend–8 months pregnant from vacation sex. I always tell people to please not use my story to “encourage” anyone facing infertility. If nothing else, this process has helped me understand just how much we don’t understand ANYONE’s backstory, and therefore don’t have the right to judge or pontificate.
I love your blog. You do such a service for so many of us, and it was such a salve to come here when I was in the darkest of my days. I keep reading because, despite my enormous stroke of luck, I still consider myself infertile. Please keep up the good work, Mel. You are much needed, and much appreciated.

11 Cattiz J { 01.05.11 at 9:19 am }

I am here. Since a few weeks. Am in the beginning of this journey towards a baby with fertility treatments. Have lot’s to read and learn about it all. Thanks for keeping this space open to all!

12 April { 01.05.11 at 9:25 am }

I am here, though I don’t comment as often as I should. I’m still in testing, still not pregnant by any means, and still wishing I was on break for the holidays. Well, not I wish I was at least. Monday, I was ready to leave the house to espcape for 8 hours.

Oh, and I would totally be chocolate chip, Nice and buttery with the added nice of CHOCOLATE!!

13 Chris { 01.05.11 at 9:29 am }

I’m here. Joined yesterday. Semi- new to the IF world. Beginning #1 IVF cycle today.

14 Esperanza { 01.05.11 at 9:34 am }

Present. And I love your blog. I have so many questions but am a little star struck to ask them. Perhaps in time…

15 Dr. Blondie { 01.05.11 at 9:38 am }

I’m new here–thanks so much for your blog! I’ve gone through 3 IUIs, had two pregnancies and two miscarriages:(, and am now moving on to IVF.

16 tanya { 01.05.11 at 9:50 am }

here – want to be single mom. went thru fertility treatments (up to a point) but have now moved to adoption. been reading your blog for awhile.

17 Happy Hopefuls { 01.05.11 at 9:51 am }

Yo yo yo! I’m here and love it here!

18 Amy { 01.05.11 at 9:58 am }

I’m here. I don’t think I’ve ever de-lurked before, even though this is probably my 3rd IBDW, since I’ve been reading every single post on your blog since sometime in 2008.

I am currently 32 weeks pregnant with boy/girl twins after a FET from IVF #2 which had first resulted in a precious singleton boy named Jack who we lost at 16 weeks in February 2010.

I am a terrible blogger and commenter, but a very diligent and loyal reader and I am grateful that you put out such a great blog for all of us to enjoy!

19 Ewebey { 01.05.11 at 9:59 am }

Here. Haven’t been for awhile, but I’m reading the CDLC. Have found some great posts so far! 😀

20 Pie { 01.05.11 at 10:07 am }

ME! *waving hand in the air* I’m here!!

I’m looking forward to reading your book, it’s on my Kindle, but I’m trying to finish this loooong book first. Not sure why…

I’m also going to be a mom as of next week…I’m nervous and excited. And nervous. :)

21 Motleymommy { 01.05.11 at 10:08 am }

Hi there. I’m here. I read almost everything, comment almost never. Gonna work on that in 2011. I have a 6 year old boy and am expecting boy #2 after 3 years of unexplained infertility, a pregnancy in Jan 2010, miscarriage in March of 2010 and surprise pregnancy in April of 2010. Counting my blessings every day – but still completely identify with those on the struggle.

22 CortneyTree { 01.05.11 at 10:11 am }

I’m here!

23 Elizabeth { 01.05.11 at 10:18 am }

I’m here :-) Does it count as lurking if you comment every once in a while but not every single time? You know I adore you and am inspired by you frequently. Not to get all kumbaya on you or anything :-) but your blog was SUCH a fabulous touchstone for information when we were starting our TTC journey, and I found blogs so much richer a virtual world (for me anyway) than message boards. I still remember my first Virtual Lushary too. And the Blilt. That was way cool. Hoping to start savoring the Creme de la Creme as soon as time permits.

24 Suzy { 01.05.11 at 10:23 am }

*Waving Hi!* and Delurking! If I were a lump of cookie dough, I’d be a gingerbread cookie. Spicey and sweet all at once. :)

25 Catherine { 01.05.11 at 10:23 am }

Hi! Here! New to blogging but v. familiar with IF. I start stims for our 2nd IVF Friday. Thanks so much for all you put out there, especially CDLD :)

26 katedaphne { 01.05.11 at 10:26 am }
27 katedaphne { 01.05.11 at 10:27 am }

ok, i did mean to leave a ~slightly~ longer comment than that!

~~raises hand~~

28 BigP's Heather { 01.05.11 at 10:29 am }

I’m here. Blogging for 4.5 years and reading for you almost as long. I have PCOS. I have a two year old daughter and we are still struggling to build our family. Currently taking a break due to time/money constraints with BigP’s job. The break may last until October or so and that is frustrating. Trying to live in the moment and not on “the break”.

29 Tigger { 01.05.11 at 10:31 am }

I’m here! I’ve been reading for…years, although I don’t know how many. We’ve been struggling with IF for 6 years, I’ve had my blog for almost 5 (holy crap!), so I probably started reading you just after you started up your blog. :) I can hardly believe it’s been that long!

Thank you for all you’ve done over the many years for the IF blogosphere, and the IF community in general. You bring attention to us, and that’s (usually) a very good thing!

30 Rebecca { 01.05.11 at 10:33 am }

I read every post and although not a true lurker, I don’t comment often, so hi.

31 Kristin { 01.05.11 at 10:44 am }

I’m here and I often run my mouth in the comment section. I’m a blogger (obviously), a secondary infertility survivor, a wife, a mother, a crafter, and so much more.

32 Krista { 01.05.11 at 10:47 am }

I’ve been around for a few years now, but was not good at commenting until I joined ICLW last month!

Thanks for organizing all of us crazy ladies, Mel! What we do without you! :-)


33 Sarah { 01.05.11 at 10:57 am }

I’m here. I read every post. I’m not always great at commenting, though!

34 May { 01.05.11 at 11:05 am }

Present! Longtime reader, sporadic (okay, practically never) commenter. Uterus retired after two kids, PCOS, two miscarriages, 3 months hospital bed rest, postpartum hemorrhage and D&C, amniotic fluid embolism, ICU, kidney failure, dialysis…

Thank goodness for health insurance!

Just finished “Life From Scratch.” Fabulous!

35 Denver Laura { 01.05.11 at 11:09 am }


36 Maren { 01.05.11 at 11:10 am }

HERE! Haha. Semi new to your blog. Just joined ICLW this month. Chose to stop IF tests/treatments and pursue adoption. We have our first class Friday.
I’m loving how great the support is within this blog network you’ve set up. I’m just barely starting so I’m working on commenting better.
Oh and I’D definitely be a white chocolate macadamia nut cookie. Mmmmmmm. I’m think that sounds like a tasty breakfast. Haha.

37 cheryllookingforward { 01.05.11 at 11:15 am }

I’m here. Always here and at so many other places. I’ve become a silent cheerleader lately.

38 Tara (TIMO) { 01.05.11 at 11:22 am }

I’m here, lurking as usual! I’d be a Chocolate Crinkle- mint flavored rolled in raw sugar. That I made 7 dozen on Christmas Day has no influence on my cookie choice. My story: spontaneous identical twin boys while on a break (cycle 41) with DOR/POF.

I have a question for you re your book. I’m trying to hold up my end of our deal and can’t find your book. Borders doesn’t have it (online or in store), it’s not on the B&N website anymore, and Amazon is out of stock. How’s a girl supposed to get a copy? Any suggestions?

39 Quiet Dreams { 01.05.11 at 11:34 am }

I’m here! I just finished “Life From Scratch” and LERVED it!

40 Warrior Woman { 01.05.11 at 11:43 am }

I’m here! I’ve been lurking for awhile and was recently diagnosed with Unexplained Infertility. I just had my first IUI December 29th and am trying to not get my hopes up too much. Thanks for all your advocacy and insight, and keep up the good work!

41 Kristi { 01.05.11 at 11:46 am }

I have been a rabid fan of yours for over a year now. I also have the copy of Life from Scratch sitting on my desk. I have also had the honor of meeting our head queen in person. She is very nice and pretty.

42 kimbosue { 01.05.11 at 11:47 am }

Me. I read often, comment seldom.

43 Hope { 01.05.11 at 12:10 pm }

Hi, I’m here occasionally. :-)

44 Missy { 01.05.11 at 12:15 pm }

I’m Missy. I’ve been following for something like 4 days. Followed a link from someone’s CDLC button and already referred your blog to a fellow infertility struggler. Infertility, miscarriage, and stillbirth on the resume so I’m always looking for people to connect with. Especially with people who compile and do all the work for me. For which I am truly appreciative!

45 Krista { 01.05.11 at 12:33 pm }

I’ve been following your blog for a few years, but have never been a commentor. Finally started commenting after I decided to join ICLW last month!
Thanks for all you do, Mel!

46 Jenny F. Scientist { 01.05.11 at 12:41 pm }

Hi! I’m an overeducated housewife, and I found the ALI community through some comments on a series I wrote on antidepressants in pregnancy (among other things). I’ve not personally had fertility trouble, but a lot of my friends have, and it’s been helpful to know some of the right (and wrong) things to say or not say. (When a friend had a miscarriage of a much-wanted child, for example, I skipped the annoying platitudes and sent her a care package with a note that said, “That sucks. Here are some things that hopefully don’t suck. I’m so sorry.” See? We CAN be taught!

47 Jenny F. Scientist { 01.05.11 at 12:41 pm }

) (oops)

48 T Lee { 01.05.11 at 12:49 pm }

Here! I was around a lot last year, then disappeared a bit, and am just now trying to get into the swing of things…

And chocolate chip, because I’m kind of ‘ordinary,’ but totally chunkywith a little flava. Whomp-whomp. Sorry.

49 Eileen { 01.05.11 at 12:52 pm }

Hi there! De-lurking myself. I found you just after my miscarriage (and have read every post since), and have been blogging for, 6 posts now? 😛 I love everything you’ve accomplished! xoxo

50 Amy/Anat { 01.05.11 at 1:10 pm }

If I de-lurked last year, do I need to do it again this year?

51 serenity { 01.05.11 at 1:11 pm }

[Raising hand] Here. Always.

And if I were a lump of cookie dough? It’s have to be gingerbread or molasses or something. But when you baked me you’d have to add icing. Because icing on cookies ROCK.


52 Susan { 01.05.11 at 1:17 pm }

I’ve been reading you since my 3-year-old IVF twins were just a glimmer in my RE’s eye. I often wonder how you find time for everything that you do! You are truly a source of strength and inspiration (you yourself and all the things you do to bring the community together). Thank you!

53 Roccie { 01.05.11 at 1:52 pm }

Always here.

54 a { 01.05.11 at 1:53 pm }

I’m here aL the time. I would say I’m chocolate chip cookie dough because everyone loves me, but that would be kind of untrue. So make it chocolate chip cookie dough with cactus spikes.

I just read your book – yesterday morning. It was great! I will try to remember to write a review on Amazon

55 Kelly { 01.05.11 at 1:56 pm }

Here! Been reading for three or so months. I’ve only been playing the infertility game for about a year! Glad to have your blog to read-such a valuable resource!

56 Michelle { 01.05.11 at 2:05 pm }

I’m here! I’m here. Insert jumping at the back of the crowd like a looney.

Started my blog in July, found you, figured you out… and have now been spreading the word about your goodness. I wish I had found you years before this mess began. Even coo coo doc was asking questions about my blog and I referred her to YOU in order to help other RPL/infertile girls like myself.

I read everything you post. Love your wit. Love your challenge of the world around us. And you even respond to my emails!!!!

Cha…you rock!

57 Alexis { 01.05.11 at 2:07 pm }

Here. I’ve known about your blog for quite a while, but only been a regular reader for a few months, since I’ve been doing treatment. I have PCOS and we’ve been TTC’ing #2 for 18 months.

58 Natalie { 01.05.11 at 2:13 pm }

Hello, I’m here and there. I’ve been reading for about a year, and comment when I have something witty to say, which isn’t often. =) I have one wonderful almost 4 year-old daughter. Struggling with IF for about 7 year now. Would desperately wish to give her a sibling, but I am starting to come to terms with the fact that that might not happen. Struggling to deal with the fact that money is becoming a deciding factor.
Thank you for your blog, and your links to other blogs. I love the weekly round-ups you do to help steer me toward new blogs to read. My new year’s resolution was actually to get more involved and possibly even start a blog of my own.

59 Beth { 01.05.11 at 2:19 pm }

still here – quietly sitting in the back of class, being my introverted self!

mmmmmmmmmmmm cookie dough! I’d have to say peanut butter dough with chocolate and peanut butter chips. just cuz I LOVE THOSE COOKIES!

60 jill { 01.05.11 at 2:49 pm }

I’m here :)

61 Anna { 01.05.11 at 2:51 pm }

Here, reading for a couple years now (er… 3 or 4…), commented perhaps 3 times total? :) Male factor IF and a wish to adopt “someday” has lead us to 2 gorgeous sons through adoption and paperwork ready for a third child. I *love* reading the Creme de la Creme every year!

62 Betty M { 01.05.11 at 2:51 pm }

Here! Always reading, not commenting much though.

63 Chickenpig { 01.05.11 at 3:08 pm }

Here! I’ve been a fan of yours since RESOLVE BB days. Luuuved your book.

64 HereWeGoAJen { 01.05.11 at 3:11 pm }

My name is Jen. I use my full internet title to distinguish myself from all the other Jens because there are a lot of us. You were I think the first person I told about my potential internet title. I am awesome. I like to cook, but only when I feel like it so this three meals a day thing is pretty annoying. I also like chocolate, but only milk chocolate. Dark chocolate is an abomination. A smallish dog is sitting behind me on my chair right now and something must have scared him because he is shivering in fear so much that his shivers are causing typos. Yesterday, I finally got the insurance company to admit that I do not owe them an extra $93.06 like I’ve been saying for months now. But now they know that I am always right, as people tend to learn after knowing me for any significant period of time. There is a school bus out in front of my house right now.

65 Pioggia { 01.05.11 at 3:40 pm }

I come here on and off, I just have nothing to say.

66 Lisa { 01.05.11 at 3:47 pm }

Always reading, not a big commenter. I think you, and a lot of the other bloggers I’ve read because of you, are fantastic and wonderful and really help a lot of people.
Still childless after 5+ years, POF, 5 ivfs and all the other junk that goes along with it. Thinking of adopting now and even went to a meeting. I’m also adopted. My birth name was Melissa! My newest passion is making fancy cupcakes. It makes me happy. Thank you Mel for all you do.

67 Sarah { 01.05.11 at 4:04 pm }

I’m Here!! I stumbled on your website while look at blogs about Infertility. Someone had this button for a strange think called “ICLW” and I wanted to find out more!! I lurked for a while and then started taking part in ICLW!

I read your blog often, I love your views and the way you word things.

I am 3 months pregnant with my first child after 2 rounds of IVF and 4 years of Infertility.

I have found your blog roll a life saver to me, it is great to see and read about other women in the same boat as I am!!

68 Sharon { 01.05.11 at 4:09 pm }

I am new here and consider me delurked :)

69 Amy { 01.05.11 at 4:15 pm }

I’ve only just begun to be here (does that even make sense to anyone but me?) but I’m now a consistent presence. I just bought your first book and I’m so thankful to have found this online community that is opening my eyes to so many resources. My DH and I have been TTC for 4 years and had two failed IUIs this year. We’re trying to re-evaluate our approach and determine our next step(s). In the meantime I’m getting healthier and trying acupuncture and doing my best to reduce my stress levels. One of the things that helps me reduce stress is reading your blog! So I thank you. Not just for your bravery in sharing your story with the world, but also for introducing me to so much more that is out there for us ALI folks online! I’m loving it and it is SOOO needed right now. Happy International Blog Delurking Week!!

70 Randi { 01.05.11 at 4:17 pm }

I’m a reader, and have been for months since I joined the situation room. Sometimes I comment, other times I don’t – but I always love your blog. I should try this on my blog and see who comes out of the woodwork… 😉 Happy new year!

71 Diana { 01.05.11 at 4:20 pm }

Delurking, TTC after TR two and a half yrs ago, still unsuccessful :( hoping this yr changes that fact.

72 maryandmungo { 01.05.11 at 4:29 pm }

just found this blog / web site today, looks excellent.
i have two blogs, the newest of which is posted above.
Mary from the UK

73 jodifur { 01.05.11 at 4:51 pm }

I’m not a lurker but I’m here.

74 Carly { 01.05.11 at 5:19 pm }

Hi! Longtime lurker, first-time commenter (so original, I know.) Struggling with IF for about two years now; official diagnosis is “Unexplained” (yech). After six rounds of Clomid, six months using “the Cup” (don’t even ask), and three failed (medicated) IUI’s, we’re currently waiting to book our consultation with the clinic so we can move ahead with our first IVF. In my free time I’m a full-time insurance broker waaay up north in British Columbia, Canada (about 15 hours away from the Yukon), not-by-a-long-shot newlywed (where did the last two years go?!), and avid blog reader.

To make a long-ish post hopefully a little shorter, I followed a link from another ALI blog, found yours, and was instantly overwhelmed! I have to admit, it took me a while to come back and really check things out, but I’m so glad that I did. You really do have invaluable resource here. One of my foremost New Year’s resolutions: Order both your books and hope they tide me over during the wait for the call from the clinic. :)

75 MaryFrancis { 01.05.11 at 5:20 pm }

This is my first ever delurking post! I’ve been a faithful reader of your blog for……..1 week now! I saw the ICLW on someones page, and am so glad I found your blog. It is so informative and has so many great links, and I can’t wait to read some back posts. I was recently diagnosed with PCOS, and decided to start my own blog to meet others who are in a similar situation, and to learn all I can about IUI, IVF, and Clomid, so I know how I should proceed. Thank you!

76 Ashley { 01.05.11 at 6:10 pm }

Here! Trying to make it through the Creme de la Creme list (very slowly). My hubby and I have just recently switched to domestic infant adoption after spending last year doing embryo adoption.

77 Rosie { 01.05.11 at 6:15 pm }

Hi… delurking!! I am very impressed by your energy and focus! And your great service to this community. You have had a very positive effect on so many peoples lives. Thank you.
I am 49, and 20 days pregnant with my first baby or babies… after years of trying, the second of two DE IVF’s this year has worked.
I wish I could say I would be a lemon bar.. but I’m more complicated than that.. probably something with cranberries and chocolate and cardamom.

78 TasIVFer { 01.05.11 at 6:18 pm }

I’m here. Sitting in my office in Tasmania and being naughty reading blogs. It’s a lovely not-too-hot-but-perfect summer’s day. Work is slow as I’m a project manager and most people I need to be in contact with at the moment are on leave, giving me some time to breath and read my way through the Crème de la Crème. If I was a good girl I’d be taking leave now too. My husband has this month off because he had too much leave and was basically forced to. Luckily my manager is too disorganised to realise I have too much leave. We’ve been saving our leave for years cuz of course we’d need it when we had a baby, right? Yeah, right. In theory we’ll need it this year (my husband’s already requested all of September off), but we’ll see. In theory we should have needed it last year too but didn’t. And I’ve been meaning to email you back about a conversation we’ve been having in my head during the New Year break. 😉

79 Rebecca { 01.05.11 at 6:20 pm }

I’m here! And, I finished Life from Scratch yesterday and LOVED it!!! So happy to find another way that you rock!! :)

80 C { 01.05.11 at 7:34 pm }

Buller…Buller….I’m here!

I’m 29 and about 1 month away from my first donor egg transfer. Been with my hubby since high school. I work in the catering business. If I were a lump of cookie dough I would be chocolate chip and toffee bits…yummy!

81 Jem { 01.05.11 at 7:45 pm }

Not really delurking, because I’ve commented before… However, I do love your blog and you for all you do for us out in IF-land. I just started stims today for IVF#3. We’re MFI, with complications from immunological factors and aga (40 – ack!). What cookie would I be? I’d be a version of the Mrs.Field’s chocolate, chocolate chip (with oatmeal) cookie that I make. It’s my DH’s favorite, and mine, too!

82 Jenny { 01.05.11 at 8:43 pm }

I’m here! I’m 30, infertiley, unemployed, contemplating going back to university, and desperately wanting another baby after losing my baby girl in October. I’m only new to the blogiverse and what an absolute godsend you are – thank you for ICLW and Creme de la Creme and everything else!

83 Tonggu Momma { 01.05.11 at 9:01 pm }

I comment sometimes, so I’m not sure if I really fall into the lurker category. But you scared me, so I thought “better safe than sorry!” *grin*

84 Lisa { 01.05.11 at 9:13 pm }

Hi there! I’ve been lurking for a little over a year. I found your wonderful website via a baby loss/infertility blogger who links you.
It took us 18 years to conceive our first child, and he died at 4 months old from a congenital heart defect. NYE marked a year since he died. We are almost 43 and trying for baby #2 while dealing with PCOS, Hashimoto’s, hypothyroid, insulin resistance/borderline diabetes, and my weight. We are a work in progress.

Thank you for all that you do!

85 lianne { 01.05.11 at 9:36 pm }

Just started reading! I’m 30 and currently undergoing our 2nd IUI. If I was a cookie…definitely something chocolate!

86 Lynn { 01.05.11 at 10:38 pm }

I’m here! And, although I’ve been following this blog for a year and a half and do comment occasionally, I will say my commenting does not equal my visiting. I visit your blog daily, but comment maybe once a week. So, in honour of International Blog Delurking Week, I’ll try to remember to comment more often 😀

Btw, if I were cookie dough, I’d probably be a gingersnap – sweet and a little spicy, generally lovely but not everyone’s cup of tea!

87 Jennette { 01.05.11 at 10:46 pm }

Hi, I’m delurking too. I’m a reader, (I’m an IF/IVF/Adoption blog addict actually) – a reader not a writer (although I compose a daily entry in my head every night). I’m an infertile that spent many years struggling to make my dream of having a family come true. Then one day IVF became available to me and my journey as a mother began, just weeks before my 40th birthday. My son is turning 7 next week. He doesn’t have any siblings, that twists in my heart….

I’m a lurker-sometimes-poster
I find I need to daily connect with others traveling a similar path, or just plain traveling a path with bumps… even if we never meet or even speak. It helps…

88 coffeegrl { 01.05.11 at 11:20 pm }

Wow. I’m amazed to see so many new faces. Guess I shouldn’t be amazed, maybe the better way to put it is that I’m happy to make new friends and acquaintances in blogland. I’m not new here, but have been a sporadic reader and commenter lately. We’re back in Japan again as of just last week so the last few months were spent in “holiday preparation” or “packing for international travel” mode. Wish it was as glamorous as it sounds. But if you’ve ever read my blog you know that living in Japan with one’s in-laws while it has it’s advantages, isn’t always easy-going….

89 Annie { 01.05.11 at 11:24 pm }

I’m here, too. I love your blog and am currently enjoying the Creme de la Creme list!

90 Aunt Misfit { 01.05.11 at 11:41 pm }

I am delurking and telling you that I had the pleasure of introducing my husband to the vocabulary word “mondegreen.” Turns out, ELO’s Don’t Bring Me Down has THE most misheard lyric of all time. How apt!

91 Summer { 01.06.11 at 12:01 am }

Hey Mel! Been here since almost the very beginning (I still remember your first comment on my blog and thinking anyone willing to call herself stirrup queen is tops in my book!).

Although I don’t comment much anymore I still do visit a lot!

92 Tracy { 01.06.11 at 12:07 am }


Been reading for a couple of years…we have one IVF miracle who is about to turn one!! :)

93 Kerry Johnson-Smith { 01.06.11 at 1:08 am }

Still here, but in a holding pattern and no clue where I am heading. I actively read many blogs but usually remain pretty quiet unless I feel strongly about something. Mostly I am in awe and filled with admiration for the women who are trying to grow their family.

94 Tanya { 01.06.11 at 2:30 am }

I am loud and proud and here. Thanks for the loving attention to give all us IF bloggers your extreme and blazing efforts are deeply appreciated.

Sending out some vibrational – Tim Tam Slams to you ! (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tim_Tam_Slam).


95 marion { 01.06.11 at 4:55 am }

I don’t visit as often as I should… My story is a long one. Still hoping for our little miracle.

96 Vee { 01.06.11 at 5:17 am }

I’m here :)

97 Kat { 01.06.11 at 7:23 am }

Hi. I have been “lurking” (ha) about three and a half years. I don’t have fertility issues myself, but my older sister did and I wanted to understand a little more about what she was going through.

I read Hardscrabble way back and then found you.

I kept reading because you are a good writer, and I now have two kids so I like reading about your parenting trials and tribulations. I lurk on askmoxie a lot too.

I also think you are kind of a marketing genius.

98 L A Cochran { 01.06.11 at 7:35 am }

Why do we not get time off from work for this important holiday? What’s the “new” congress doing about that? *taps foot*

99 Justine { 01.06.11 at 7:47 am }

I’m not exactly a lurker, but I will post a comment expressing my deep and sincere admiration. :) Happy IBDW! (And *love* LA Cochran’s comment about time off from work.)

100 Kate { 01.06.11 at 8:31 am }


101 Trish { 01.06.11 at 8:45 am }

Delurking and have been reading you for about 4 years. 9 IVFs, 2 children and I still love checking in to see what you’ve been up to.

102 Stimey { 01.06.11 at 9:08 am }

Well, hello! I’m always here. Unless I’m in my living room reading my copy of Life From Scratch, which is great, by the way!

103 Kir { 01.06.11 at 9:11 am }

always here…you’re my “HERO” in the blogging world. The one who I read to feel better, think better, be better.

Blogland just wouldn’t be the same without you :) xo

104 Angie { 01.06.11 at 9:37 am }

I read here, though I don’t know if I am considered a lurker, since I comment, just not as often as I used to. My Blackberry doesn’t let me comment on many blogs. Sending you love from PhilaPa.

105 Valarie { 01.06.11 at 9:49 am }

I love your blog Mel and have been a follower for years. I myself do not blog, and I’m afraid that allows me to forgot how wonderful it must feel to receive comments. I love your blog and am so greatful for all of your hard work!
I too am a mother to twins. They are eight years old and simply my entire world. It took seven IUIs and multiple HSGs and fibroid removals to get pregnant, but I was extremely fortunate to get pregnant and never suffer a loss.
This past year I went through the horrific breakup of my twenty year reltionship and I am soooooo looking forward to a healing 2011.
Thank you Mel, from the bottom of my heart for all that you do!

106 Cibele { 01.06.11 at 11:24 am }

I am here, I am always here. Thank you for all you do!!! you are a true inspiration!!!!!

107 Sarang { 01.06.11 at 11:53 am }

Here! :-) I read your blog often, but comment less often. Have a private blog that’s open to IF Sisters I know IRL who have changed mw life. Super big advocate of support groups, where I met these ladies. Moving on to adoption (kicking off paperwork this week!) after 3 IVF’s and 2 chemical pg’s. We have head-scratching unexplained. Also considering GC for our frozens as I am tirer of sticking embies in me.

Thank you for being here and being you. You are a light.

108 Marly { 01.06.11 at 12:10 pm }

I am here for sure! If i were cookie dough, id probably be chocolate peanut butter, just cause its scrumptious… i have found your website to be the BEST TTC/IF collaboration ever, being dealing with IF ,its not so easy to just strike it up at work, hey you hav ea hard time TTC??? lol so here is a lil anonymous, but at the same time, its amazing, so again THANK YOU

109 Deborah { 01.06.11 at 12:35 pm }

I don’t actually read your blog, although I am familiar with it as I read LFCA, and I have a link to your master blogroll on my blog. But I just googled IBDW to see whether it was really an international holiday, and your post was the first one that came up. So, thanks for doing what you do for us all. :)

110 April { 01.06.11 at 12:51 pm }

Here! Found you via creatingafamily.org a few months ago.

111 Illanare { 01.06.11 at 1:12 pm }

Here! Read you regularly but only de-lurk once a year…

112 STEsker { 01.06.11 at 1:35 pm }

Definitely, firmly, solidly here. Was here in silence three years ago when I was trying for my first. After 15 months and a trip to the fertility doctor, I was able to get pregnant and had an amazing little boy in March 2009. I’m back again now, in my ninth month of trying for a second. Just starting to come to terms with this struggle to have another child…. weighing my options on whether I should just let nature decide, or whether I should pursue the modern medical route… Thank you for being there and connecting me to so many sage voices.

113 Summer { 01.06.11 at 2:04 pm }

*raises hand*

114 Mandy { 01.06.11 at 2:14 pm }

I’m a frequent reader…a wanna-be blogger. I started a blog, got one post and that’s it. Shame on me. But I blog alot in my head. I can imagine my headings and which pictures I’ll use, but somehow it never quite makes it to my computer screen. My husband and I had a long road of infertility before we were blessed with twins on our 2nd IUI attempt. We got lucky pretty quickly and cheaply! I recently (2 weeks ago) had a total abdominal hysterectomy to remove endometriosis which had completely covered my uterus and turned it to mush (my Dr.’s words). So hi! I’m here and reading often. I still keep the infertility cause close to my heart. I’m just one of the lucky ones who went to war and came home a winner with minimal battle wounds.

115 2latek8 { 01.06.11 at 2:39 pm }

I’m here too. I’ve been reading your blog for a couple of months. Experiencing secondary fertility- and your blog/blogroll has been great! Maybe I’ll even start my own.

116 Marie { 01.06.11 at 4:10 pm }

Here occasionally. I’m also delurking my desire to be added to your extensive blogroll, and will be emailing to that effect immediately.

117 Car { 01.06.11 at 4:36 pm }

Here regularly for the last 8 months. I am part of L section of the ALI world and found you just after I started blogging about the fallout from death of my son in April 2010. Unfortunately, conceiving has never been easy for us and I worry that I will need to make use of all the infertility information you have collected here as well.

Mel, you are wonderful in so many ways and I like to think that I could have enjoyed your writing without becoming a card carrying member of the ALI world. If I were a cookie, it would have to be something that was at least 75% chocolate with a little bit of chocolate flavored dough to hold it together. I’m all about the chocolate.

118 MrsSmig { 01.06.11 at 5:03 pm }

Lurker ahoy! Big fan of the blog and your particular view on fertility, parenthood and life in general. Been dealing with infertility for over 2 years, and am crossing fingers, toes, eyes, etc. for 2011. Cookie dough would definitely be snickerdoodles, right after being coated with cinnamon sugar. Keep up the good work!

119 suicide_blond { 01.06.11 at 5:06 pm }

i lurk about here … thanks for all your sharing/work we appriciate it…even if we dont alllways “speak up” and say so!

120 Sara { 01.06.11 at 8:11 pm }

You’re too funny. What are we supposed to do to celebrate I Love Fonts week?

121 Rebecca { 01.06.11 at 8:37 pm }

Here! I read but don’t comment much…still love you though for all you do for our community, and just cause you ROCK!

122 Renae { 01.06.11 at 10:12 pm }

Have stopped by off and on over the past few years. Love the blogroll and the amazing blogs I’ve found thru it. Not a big commenter but enjoy reading your thoughts.

If I were a lump of cookie dough I would definitely be molasses cookie dough.

123 aisha { 01.06.11 at 10:23 pm }

I don’t consider myself a lurker- but just writing to say hi again- long time reader and commenter- love your blog and all you do :)

124 MrsH { 01.07.11 at 12:27 am }

Here. Macadamia nuts

125 Meg { 01.07.11 at 1:02 am }

I’m here and I’m new! Just found out about our IF last week. Glad there’s a virtual support group here. :)

126 Practice Makes Perfect? { 01.07.11 at 1:24 am }

I lurk. I compose blog posts in my head all the time. But I just don’t write them because I am (a) sort of private and afraid of the internet and (b) tired & overworked.

I have secondary infertility. It is maddening. I got pregnant on the second try with our daughter who is going to be 4 in 2 weeks. She is the light of my life. But she walks around with babies in her shirt all day long telling me that she is a big sister. She craves it. Just like I do. I am getting old and I knew something was wrong pretty quickly. It took a while to get into IF treatment. I got pregnant after 5 IUIs last July, m/c twins in September. Back on the fertility treatment bandwagon in Dec. and living the neurotic hell which is the day before my period starts. I realized I didn’t want to go to the bathroom at work today because I don’t want to know. I regain my optimism somewhere around cycle day 2 or 4. But cycle day -1 or -3 is really the pits. Why women have to deal with infertility and PMS at the same time is something I muse about, a lot. I am close to giving up. Not sure I can do this much longer. Not sure I want kids that are 5+ years apart. Not sure I want twins. That is my post for the day.

127 Harini { 01.07.11 at 1:38 am }

I lurk. I love your blog and your organization skills. I don’t comment because you would think I have nothing in common with you. I’m not American, I’m not from the UK – I’m Indian.

I struggled for about 20 months to have my first child before I conceived through clomid treatment. I have PCOS. I had a miscarriage. And although I have a one year old now, I feel the place i still belong is in the ALI community – not in happy fertility land.

128 luna { 01.07.11 at 2:35 am }

I’m here, still! you know me though. just waving my hand as part of the melissa fan club.

hmm. cookie dough. I just made some yummy molasses ginger cookies the other night, and I just love that last step when you scoop up a ball and roll it gently in a dish of sugar, then lightly press to flatten. mmm…. but I do love me some chocolate. anything with real good chocolate.

129 chhandita { 01.07.11 at 3:58 am }

am here..been here for some years now! Former IF (a minnow compared to most IFers i know). now TTC #2. love the support you provide.

130 Janey { 01.07.11 at 6:14 am }

Hi Mel. I’ve been blogging for 10 months, beginning as a way to work through the in-between world of ‘subfertility’ (one child, followed by a loss, then struggling ttc #2). Found your site through other bloggers, visit often, comment occasionally, always appreciate what you do. Currently 17 weeks pregnant after clomid – anxious but cautiously optimistic.

131 LisaB { 01.07.11 at 8:45 am }

*waves* I love everything you do & write! Thank you!

132 Rachael { 01.07.11 at 9:26 am }

I’m here! Longtime reader, very occasional commenter, big fan of your efforts to create and maintain community.

Peanut butter cookie with chocolate chips. Seriously, thank you.

133 neeroc { 01.07.11 at 11:02 am }

Hi! Longtime reader, may have commented under my previous blogging ID, not sure, age and ART have stolen my brain. 41 now, 8 IVF attempts, DD was born on 7th attempt, m/c’d last year, and now we’re facing ‘that’ decision. And I’m kicking and screaming about it.

134 Hope { 01.07.11 at 5:04 pm }

I’m here–still new to blogging community so very green and getting my feet wet! Thanks for what you do–its awesome and SO needed! Began blogging this past October and it is really helpful! Zoe was stillborn in 2007 and Addie was miscarried in 2010. xxx Hope

135 JJ { 01.07.11 at 9:08 pm }

Love you :)

136 Nikki { 01.08.11 at 11:23 am }

I’m here.

I’ve been reading for the past year, but I’m not good about leaving comments. (Sorry!) I don’t know how you find the time to organize all this, but I’m glad you do. Thanks!

137 k { 01.08.11 at 9:43 pm }

I’m a lurker – three months and counting. We’ve been trying for a little over a year and found you as I was realizing that it was time to go to the doctor to find out if there is a cause for our infertility *I’m still in denial about that word* The tests showed MF is probably contributing but our dr said we are good candidates for IUI or IVF. We are on hold for 6 months, waiting on my 2 year anniversary at work so my insurance will pay for our treatment. Thank you for all the info on 1st time RE appts, testing and HSG. It really helped to know what to expect.

138 Baby Smiling In Back Seat { 01.08.11 at 9:48 pm }

You know I’m here, but I’ll wave hello anyway.

139 Valery Valentina { 01.09.11 at 7:51 am }

Here every now and then… for two years now? Thank you for encouraging me to start my own blog and having me on your blog roll. Stepmothering and thinking about DonorEggs proves almost too difficult to me, struggling on…

140 myinfertilitywoes { 01.09.11 at 8:42 am }

I’ve been reading your blog for a little over a year and love that you’ve put us all together. We’ve been TTC for 3 years now. This community has saved me and has been such huge therapy for me, with the bonus of making new friends who have meant so much! Thank you!

141 Lut C. { 01.10.11 at 4:24 pm }

Crème de la Crème AND delurking week. Gah! Overload!

I propose that the next Crème de la Crème list is opened 2 weeks earlier (mid-December). In my experience the last 2 weeks of December are always the most quiet (and lonely), the ideal time to read that huge list of posts.

142 Daffys { 01.11.11 at 5:40 am }

Hi Mel! I’m delurking! Read constantly, but rarely comment. I love your blog, your writing style and just everything really. You help me to work through my own feelings of loss, even though they happened a while ago, and I’ve since gone on to birth 2 beautiful children (4 and 2 now) Thank you!

143 David Gaines { 01.11.11 at 3:29 pm }

Here. Late but here.

144 David Gaines { 01.11.11 at 3:32 pm }

And I’d be a Double Chocolate Chip Fudge Brownie cookie…

145 Jen { 01.11.11 at 6:54 pm }

I’m here. A few days late. I only just discovered this magical and comforting world last week. Since then, I’ve done a lot of poking around, and have decided to start a blog of my own. Thanks for being here.

146 Cherish { 01.11.11 at 9:23 pm }

Also late, but here! Life is just so busy (and full of winter sickness) lately. I would be a cookie with butterscotch, peanut butter, AND chocolate chips, because I like to be well rounded. :)

I’m planning to buy your new book, so I won’t enter the giveaway.

147 Jenny { 01.16.11 at 11:23 am }

Here! Just discovered your blog last night, and spent the evening poking around. I think this is my coming out week on fertility blogs (posting/commenting), and I’m feeling pretty gobsmacked by how many of us there are out there!

148 Billy { 01.27.11 at 10:34 am }

Still January! Yeah, I’m very late on my blog reading lately, but still reading…
And I don’t know what cookie I am, but if you’d ask what animal, then I’d like to be a sloth!

149 Angelina { 02.12.11 at 8:48 pm }

Here. I just found you yesterday, so I feel like this party ended hours ago and I just showed up. Oh well. Can I take home the leftover booze? And all the cookies too!

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