Comments on: Woman Tweets Abortion, Internet Implodes

By: Kir

Kir — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 18:02:03 +0000

Thank you for this post…
I am a pro-choice Catholic, infertile woman. I agree with everything you said. Actually MORE since I had the twins, because I know my religion and some moralists would think that IVF was the “wrong” way to get PG. In my heart, I know that without choices how can we all live without judgement from ourselves and others? We need to be able to do what is BEST for us mentally, physically and emotionally at the time when we are going through it. I can’t imagine a woman not having that choice. It may never be MY Choice, but it needs to exist. Just like my sons needed to exist for me.

there is much more to add is there, these lovely ladies, said it all so eloquently..but I wanted my words somewhere on this page, to be part of this discussion.

By: Reccan

Reccan — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 16:56:50 +0000

I was trained as a lay-midwife then became a nurse; since then, I have become horribly and painfully disabled. From this standpoint, I’ve got to correct a few errors — one of fact, one of judgement:

- When an egg is fertilized, it can tumble out without ever implanting, and you’ll never know. Therefore, we have been made to waste some embryos anyway. Yet so many think that “life starts at conception.” In practical terms, there isn’t even a potential for life until implantation.

- I know a number of people with various disabilities, some acquired through accident or illness, some born that way. Life is about what you CAN do, not what you can’t, and terminating a pregnancy because your kid won’t look/act like others is lethally prejudicial — and excessively optimistic: how do you know they won’t be disabled later in life? Most of my sailing team’s parents never expected that _we_ would be!

My friends who use wheelchairs have sickening stories about all the people who say, “I’d rather be dead than like you.” Holy cow!!! Productive lives full of love and work and play, a deep awareness of the value of life, liked and admired by all who know them — and some random idiots would shoot themselves before going there??

OK, climbing off the soapbox.

Correlating living tissue with a life is weird to me. Personally, I correlate the spirit with personality (I may be wrong) — and I’ve noticed that some kids are born with a personality, most take a few days to get one, and some suddenly acquire one at 3 months but until then seemed pretty blank — and this remark, from her parents. Makes me wonder about how and when one is ensouled. Why would it be exactly the same for everyone? Nothing else is!

Thanks to Mel for this opportunity, and extra thanks to those calling themselves pro-life who contribute so gently and thoughtfully to this discussion. ESPECIALLY to those, like our British friend, who work hard for real choices for women and real care & support for mothers and children.

By: Dora

Dora — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 18:28:41 +0000

Writing this without reading the comments. (Short on time right now, but will go back and read all the comments.) Mel, my dear, I love you for writing this! I love you anyway, but your bravery in writing this post is an example for our daughters. Silence = death. Reproductive rights are reproductive rights. Period.

By: Farah

Farah — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 17:19:31 +0000

This story has exploded in the news around here. I cannot stop myself from thinking about it. Honestly, I am intrigued by her openness but bothered by some of her wordings.

By: Guera!

Guera! — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 12:27:00 +0000

Ay Ay Ay you opened quite the can of worms Mel! I was going to respond yesterday but had to spend some time thinking about whether or not I really wanted to.
I am prolife and I try to back up my beliefs with the decisions I make. It’s the principal reason I could not do IVF. I just can’t be faced with the possibility of “discarding” embryos. If eight were created I would transfer all eight. That would be insane but I couldn’t let any of those little lives be destroyed. So I won’t put myself in that position. I also would never have used birth control that kept a fertilzed egg from implanting either. While I believe in reproductive rights I don’t think that necessarily includes the “right” to have an abortion. I have never bought into the argument that “it’s my body and nobody can tell me what to do with my body”. There’s more than one life at stake once a woman becomes pregnant. I also can’t for the life of me equate an abortion to a colonoscopy. You lost me there. I don’t see the correlation at all.
What really disturbs me is that the radicals on both sides of the issue make healthy, reasonable, respectful dialogue almost impossible. I would never refer to a doctor who performs abortions as a “baby killer” and nor do I appreciate the myriad of names pro-abortionists use to refer to pro-lifers.
I don’t expect to change anyone’s mind and mine certainly won’t be changed. I would not judge someone who finds themselves in a terribly difficult and painful situation that causes them to consider abortion as an option. I believe in compassion above all else.

By: denny

denny — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 02:48:25 +0000

I have to say kudos to you all for such intelligent input…if only this debate could be framed with such civility in the media…. Having been raised Catholic my wife and I fought our share of battles with the Vatican dogma that frowns on assisted reproduction. Seeing those ricecake embryos for the first time firmed my belief that life begins at fertilization. 40 embryos, six years, 4 REs, and $70,000 later we have a daughter as a result of one of those ricecakes finally making it the full gestational time.
Despite my strong belief in the personhood of an embryo, I can’t sit in judgement over women who have made the choice to have an abortion. Having seen how soul piercing it was for my wife to bring a child into this world, I can’t help believing it must be a tremendous loss for a woman to make the decision to abort a pregnancy–no matter what the reason. And as someone pointed out early on in the comments above-why as a society have we not done a better job at providing support for single mothers so that abortion does not become the most financially feasible solution for them?
The sad truth is, society doesn’t value the incredible biological ability that every woman has to create life. More time is spent picketing clinics or boycotting Superbowl commercials than coming up with initiatives for stay at home moms, for furthering the education of single moms, and as far as I can tell the 2000 pages of health bill don’t feature any funding for infertility coverage to help fertility challenged women realize their biological need for motherhood, or tax breaks to encourage one parent or the other to be able to spend more time at home raising their child.
And as much as I want to support politicians that say that every unborn life should have rights, this question nags at me constantly: if they value children so much–born and unborn–why are the first cuts made to educational budgets that are supposed to provide education for these children to have the best chance at the pursuit of happiness?
More questions than answers…but the enlightened and nonjudgemental postings here are a refreshing alternative to the usual mudslinging that accompanies any discussion about this subject.

By: WiseGuy

WiseGuy — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 02:33:32 +0000

To consider ending a pregnancy is a very personal choice.

Also, reading Ms. Jackson’s story revealed to me that this was not a planned pregnancy, that is was wrought about by contraception failure. Coupled with the thing that the pregnancy could be life-threatening, I think she made her choice.

Tweeting abortion bought on from a pill? Hell, in a way it had to happen at some point.

I have voiced concerns about the use of emergency contraceptive pills (as regular birth control), and the fact that as of now, there is NO regulation applying on it…

And then a colleague tells me a story of how she got pregnant too soon, and how she had no idea that ending it would be so painful physically.

Maybe Angie did a favour to the atleast some of the people, letting them know what it is like to sit through a pill-induced abortion.

By: Deathstar

Deathstar — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 00:29:16 +0000

Mmmm, I’ve never considered tweeting to be my medium of choice, but I don’t have an Iphone(yet) either, so what do I know. If I wanted to open a discussion about some weighty subject, I would probably blog about it because I’m rather long winded and tweeting doesn’t really allow you to blab on. I’ve always been pro-choice and I always will be. And I am more than aware that if my son’s birthmother had decided that, I wouldn’t have him right now. Yet I stand by my beliefs. I have to admit that the very idea of tweeting about your abortion is completely ghastly to me, but I can’t dispute her right to do so. And if it helps anyone, then it has value.

By: John

John — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 22:48:04 +0000

Callie,
You’re views of abortion changed to shades of gray because you became emotionally involved in the debate. It was now YOUR decision to make. Your husband has no qualms about being selfish. You do.
For him it’s black and white. Life should be without suffering and if there is a chance that it won’t be, then it should be ended. For him, it’s not about when life begins. In fact, for pro-choice people in general it’s not about when life begins. It’s about selfishness plain and simple. Your husband has no qualms with being selfish. Objectivity means nothing to him, contrary to what he may say. Actions speak louder than words.
You have qualms about being selfish. The grayness comes from subjectivity. You know what is right, but doing what is right is difficult. This is what confuses you if you believe life begins at conception. If you don’t believe that, than it’s no big whoop anyway. You’re just cutting out tissue.
To those who say that they want abortion to be legal because they are afraid that it is a slippery slope to government control over fertility treatments in general- this is a completely illogical reason to want abortion to remain legal. If abortion is wrong than it should be outlawed. If not, than it shouldn’t be.
If government intrusion into the availability of fertility treatments is wrong than the government should be kept out of fertility treatments.
Two separate issues, folks, as the reason that abortion would be outlawed is not because of its classification as a fertility treatment but rather because of its harm to the baby (if it is indeed a baby).
To those who say that they have no right to tell other people what is right- you already do and you like it that way. You don’t think twice about laws that prevent people from killing other people or laws that prevent people from stealing from other people. Be a little more honest with yourselves. You just pick and choose what it is you tell people to do.

By: Callie

Callie — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 22:15:55 +0000

As a cradle Catholic now in my late 30′s, I believed my position on abortion to be clear. I believed life begins at conception but also believed that I didn’t have the right to impose my beliefs on others. That being said, if I’m being honest, I would probably still judge someone for making that choice as I did (do?) believe it is a life. Then I learned a belief isn’t really a belief until it’s tested. After 3 attempts at IVF, my husband and I successfully conceived a child. First, we were told the child had a high risk of Down’s Syndrome. My husband wanted to terminate the pregnancy if that turned out to be the case as he felt it unfair to bring a child into this world at a potential profound disadvantage. I disagreed – because in my view life begins at conception, and I believed I could make a life for that child. The day we learned via an amnio that the child didn’t have Down’s, we learned there was a significant risk of Cystic Fibrosis. Same conversation. Thankfully, the fetus did not have cystic fibrosis. A week later, we were told the baby had a heart condition that in 80% of cases is associated with a horrific disease in which the person develops tumours on some or all organs of the body throughout his or her lifetime with a host of related physical, developmental, and mental disabilities. At that time, everything I believed to be true about abortion was challenged and I gave real consideration to terminating the pregnancy because I just didn’t feel it fair to our child to subject him/her to that life. The initial heart diagnosis turned out to be incorrect (the baby does have a Congenital Heart Defect, but not what we were originally told), so ultimately we were spared the choice. Since then, however, my outlook has evolved from black and white to shades of gray…which continues to be confusing for me.