Posts from — July 2009
Friday Blog Roundup
If you follow me on Twitter, you know I didn’t have a great retail week. Let’s review. We’ll start with the positive.
The Good: I went to Hallmark to pick up a card. I counted out the money and handed it to the cashier. She counted it again and handed back a dollar. She could have pocketed it and I obviously wouldn’t have known the difference. I thanked her for counting diligently and walked out deciding that the next time I need a card, I will definitely head to Hallmark again instead of the other card shop that I sometimes frequent.
The Bad: I tried to order a pair of pants from J. Jill. Every part of the order was wrong–the billing address, the shipping address, the email address and the item itself despite the fact that the woman taking the order read back all the information to me. I called J. Jill and asked if they could ship the correct pants to the brick-and-mortar store nearby and I would exchange the wrong pants for the right pants. They insisted (despite the fact that this was their mistake) that they could not do that and the only solution would be for me to pay for the pants again that day (and have a second charge to my credit card) and return the other ones to the store whenever I could (and get the reimbursement on the credit card). They officially lost a customer.
I went to the mall to return the pants and the employee at the desk tried to make it right by reordering the correct pants for me, waiving the overnight shipping, and charging the original amount. Which was fine and they can keep the money from that purchase BUT they have lost me as a loyal customer of 9 years. In the end, though she fixed the problem, I received nothing for my trouble (due to their mistakes) and wasted another 2 hours of my life between phone calls and driving. Had they offered me anything for my trouble–a credit at the store, a coupon–they could have kept a customer. But there are too many stores that also have clothing I like and I don’t want to shop with a company that makes me spend an additional two hours solving their problems with no nod towards the idea that they care if I stick around.
The Ugly: I wanted to get the twins a new sticker mosaic set, but we’ve exhausted the limited supply from toy stores in our area. I called A.C. Moore and asked if they carried sticker mosaics by Orb Factory (Orb Factory, if you’re reading this, make more sets. We have literally accumulated enough sticker mosaics to wallpaper an entire room). The operator passed me first to a man and then to a woman. The woman went to check the shelves and came back to inform me that they had many sets currently in stock. I asked her if they had the mermaid one and she placed me on hold again to check. She returned to tell me that while they didn’t have the mermaid one, they had many of the other ones. I was on hold for a total of 10 minutes. I thanked her and made plans to stop working early and drive to the store.
I went to the store and couldn’t find the sticker mosaics. So I asked one employee and she didn’t know what I was talking about. She asked a man who told me that he had been the first person I spoke to. He didn’t think they carried sticker mosaics, but told me the name of the employee who kept me on hold for 10 minutes checking the shelves. He sent me to speak to a manager who told me they didn’t carry sticker mosaics at all. She shrugged her shoulders when I told her the story and said, “I just don’t know what happened.” She had no other solution than shoulder shrugging.
I left the store and will not be getting art supplies at A.C. Moore in the future. The reality is that she could have assuaged my feelings by apologizing, or telling me that she’d be speaking with that employee to find out why she would tell someone to drive out to the store for an item that they’ve never carried, or offer to help me find a similar art project for the twins. There were so many things she could have done as a manager that could have (1) gotten the store a sale and (2) ensured that a customer didn’t leave the store upset. But now they’ve lost a customer who shops at the store several times a month to keep the twins in art projects. Again, there are other art supply stores in town, and I’d rather drive out of my way or even pay more to have a better shopping experience.
Feel free to vent your own frustrating shopping experience. In fact…
When Nora asked us to do it, she sent us this picture and told us the story about the original head on a stick. The point of his story is I MET THE ORIGINAL HEAD ON A STICK. It is none other than extremely cool Karen MEG at A Day in the Life. When I met her at the conference, I had no idea her connection to the head-on-the-stick story, but once I got home and saw her blog, I found out that she is the original head. And, the best part of the story is that she is a fellow ALI blogger which goes to show that ALI bloggers are the coolest ones in the blogosphere.
Are We There Yet? has a post about her frozen embryos. She can keep them for one more year at her doctor’s office and then they need to be transferred. She writes, “I’m having difficulties with thinking of them being transferred somewhere else. Perhaps it’s a concern that something will happen during the transport, or not knowing and trusting the staff at the off site facility, or even something else entirely that I don’t even know.” It is posts like these that, for me, illustrated the difference in an Iffers world even after parenthood has been achieved. Why people say once an infertile, always an infertile. Because it’s not just that the emotional wounds run deep; it’s that in some cases, there are constant reminders.
This one from Outlandish Notions
because it made me laugh so freakin’ hard. That’s all I can say; anything else would ruin it.
Awful But Functioning has a beautiful post called “Gravitational Pull.” It is a heartbreaking post examining what is “normal” parenting after the death of a child’s sibling. She writes: “But time is funny now, defined mostly by six particular days. At times those days seemed so painfully long, so brutally eternal, we pleaded with any deities listening to end it and now. And at times, so brief, faster than a insect’s life span, caught in a whirlwind of paperwork and decisions and kleenex, before we could know — before we could know her.” My G-d, how can you not click over to read the whole thing after seeing those gorgeous words? It is a post about her living daughter’s birthday and your heart will break when you read the analogy of the sun and moon. Your heart will literally break with the beauty and truth and sadness of the words.
Sell Crazy Someplace Else has a post that kicks ass, calling out her disgust at an article titled “Woman Overcomes Obesity to Adopt Child.” Jendeis relates it to her own experience at the clinic. It is not a matter of a true health concern such as high blood pressure or cholesterol, but instead a glance at a number, a cut-off system based on BMI rather than overall health. It is a rallying cry post, one that should be read by everyone.
The roundup to the Roundup: Bitch about your favourite retail experience; you know you want to. I met the original head-on-a-stick! And lots of great blogs to read. Have a wonderful weekend.
July 31, 2009 25 Comments
The 63rd Circle Time: The Show and Tell Weekly Thread
Show and Tell is wasted on elementary schoolers. Join several dozen bloggers weekly to show off an item, tell a story, and get the attention of the class. In other words, this is Show and Tell 2.0. Everyone is welcome to join, even if you have never posted before and just found out about Show and Tell for the first time today. So yank out a photo of the worst bridesmaid’s dress you ever wore and tell us the story; show off the homemade soup you cooked last night; or tell us all about the scarf you made for your first knitting project. Details on how to participate are located at the bottom of this post.
Let’s begin.
Josh wanted me to make this my Show and Tell this week so much that he asked me twice and then edged the piece of paper into my line of vision three separate times. It finally ended up on my desk. I intended my Show and Tell to be a fantastic piece of junk mail that I received this week, but when I said that to Josh, he looked at me incredulously and said, “you’re not making my score card your Show and Tell?”
I love this man. He flew me to Chicago so I wouldn’t have to go alone, and let me squeeze all the blood out of his hand on the flight. He let me read that keynote piece while he was in the room. He deserves to have the majority of my Show and Tell space.
Josh wants you to know that he went to a Cubs game and the Cubs won and he scored the whole thing on his score card. And he was really damn cute about it.
What are you showing today?
Click here or scroll down to the bottom of this post if this is your first time joining along (Important: link to the permalink for the post, not the main url for your blog and use your blog’s name, not your name. Links not going to a Show and Tell post will be deleted). The list is open from now until late Friday night and a new one is posted every week.
- If you would like to join circle time and show something to the class, simply post each Wednesday night (or any time between Wednesday morning and Friday night), hopefully including a picture if possible, and telling us about your item. It can be anything–a photo from a trip, a picture of the dress you bought this week, a random image from an old yearbook showing a person you miss. It doesn’t need to contain a picture if you can’t get a picture–you can simply tell a story about a single item. The list opens every Wednesday night and closes on Friday night.
- You must mention Show and Tell and include a link back to this post in your post so people can find the rest of the class. This spreads new readership around through the list. This is now required.
- Label your post “Show and Tell” each week and then come back here and add the permalink for the post via the Mr. Linky feature (not your blog’s main url–use the permalink for your specific Show and Tell post).
- Oh, and then the point is that you click through all of your classmates and see what they are showing this week. And everyone loves a good “ooooh” and “aaaah” and to be queen (or king) of the playground for five minutes so leave them a comment if you can.
- Did you post a link and now it’s missing?: I reserve the right to delete any links that are not leading to a Show and Tell post or are the blogging equivalent of a spitball.
- If you want it…
I’ve now placed a Show and Tell archive on the sidebar that will be updated each week in case you miss it. And click here for the icon code if you wish to have it for your blog. It links to the archives.
July 29, 2009 26 Comments
IComLeavWe: August
There is a new way to sign up. Please read the directions below.
Welcome back to IComLeavWe. It stands for International Comment Leaving Week, but if you say it aloud, doesn’t it sounds like “I come; [but] leave [as a] we”? And that’s sort of the point. Blogging is a conversation and comments should be honoured and encouraged. I like to say that comments are the new hug–a way of saying hello, giving comfort, leaving congratulations.
Here is the vital information, pure and simple (a more detailed set of rules follows below the list):
- The list opens the 1st of every month. It remains open until the 21st. You can add yourself at any point. The list is open to everyone in the blogosphere–blog writers and/or blog readers.
- Add yourself to the list by filling out this form: The list is now closed for August. The list for September will open on 8/30.
- Click here to cut-and-paste this bit of code to add to your sidebar (if you have the old code from another month, remove it and replace it with this one). You need to add the icon or a link to the current list on your blog (see below) and will not be added until it’s up.
- Commenting kicks off every month on the 21st. Please mark it somewhere (calendar, post-it note taped to your computer…), though I will be sending out an email reminder on the 20th. Commenting week runs from the 21st to the 28th. Every day, leave 5 comments and return 1 comment for a total of 6 comments. You are highly encouraged to choose the blogs you comment on from the participants list below, but this is not required.
- I will send a second email on the 28th to remind you to remove the icon from your blog.
- Read below if you want to find out about Iron Commenters.
- The commenting ends on the 28th. We catch our breath and the whole thing starts again the next month on the 1st. Drop in and out according to what is happening in your life between the 21st and the 28th.
- Stirrup Queens (infertility, twins, books)
- Baby Smiling In Back Seat (infertility, twin pregnancy, pottery)
- Maybe Baby? (pcos, miscarriage, infertility)
- Dragondreamer’s Lair (parenting, crafts, secondary infertility)
- Three of a working on a full house… (pregnancy, neonatal loss, parenting)
- Hobbit-ish Thoughts & Ramblings (ttc break, cooking, books)
- Barefoot and (Finally) Pregnant (pregnancy, infertility, food)
- Don’t Scare Easy (hysterectomy, infertility, sinuses)
- We Got Hitched… (infertility IVF miscarriage)
- Babymaking 101 (pregnancy loss, waiting to try again on dr’s orders)
- Woman Anyone? (TTC#1, unexplained IF, impatient)
- Waiting On Baby Paramore (infertility, PCOS, miscarriage/premature birth)
- Rolling Around in My Head (disability, disphobia, disablism)
- Our Little Tongginator (china adoption, humor)
- Trying for a Baby (TTC, endometriosis, ovary suppression)
- In Due Time (infertility, pcos, life)
- Mindful Meandering (RPL; IVF; infertility)
- Everyone Else But Me (infertility, ICSI, adoption)
- The Journey To 40 and Beyond (infertility, hope, getting older)
- All Grown Up (domestic adoption, waiting, random)
- Blonde Bibliophile (food, recipes, pregnancy)
- Getting to Phoebe (infertility, adoption, phoebe)
- The Yerkes Life ~ Learning to Embrace God’s Plans (ivf, life, faith)
- Once an Infertile (journey through infertility)
- One Little Pink Line Short of Sheer Bliss (ttc, infertility, mfi)
- In Ancient Starlight (parenting, infertility, PCOS/male factor)
- Becoming Whole (emotional abuse recovery, uncertain family-building future, ponderings)
- Baby To Be (ivf, pcos, hope)
- What IF? (infertility, pcos, acupuncture)
- Tales of My Follies (clomid, getting pregnant, day to day)
- Conception Deception (male-factor, luteal phase defect, beginning treatment)
- Wandering Wonderment (mama-dom, student-dom, dumb-dom)
- Not A Fertile Myrtle (infertility, pcos, male factor if)
- A Little Hope (infertility, iui, ivf)
- Wishing4One (ivf, craziness, egypt)
- (In)fertile Myrtle (infertility, IVF, random)
- The Mis- Adventures of a Modern Day Farmer’s Wife (infertility, acupuncture, farming)
- Faith, Hope & Poop? (parenting, adoption, reading)
- My journey with Endometriosis (endo, IVF, life)
- Sell Crazy Someplace Else (dIUI, marriage, weight loss)
- Your Great Life (fertility, support, women)
- Melissa’s Thoughts and Realizations (infertility,
hypothyroid, grad school) - IF Crossroads (IUI, infertility, endo)
- Not The Path I Chose (secondary IF, IVF)
- Stork Stalker (IVF#5, infertility, life)
- I’m a Smart One (surrogacy/infertility/parenting after infertility)
- Hope in Virginia (early pregnancy post-IVF)
- Waiting on Life Part Two (adoption, parenting, life)
- Baby Making Journey (waiting, azoospermia, exercising)
- My World, My Ramblings (IUIs, IVF, MFI)
- Life is Good (pregnancy, infertility, life)
- Will Not Work for Baby (infertility, ivf, marriage)
- All Things Griffin (donor IUI, 2WW, infertility)
- Elana’s Musings (twins, parenting, randomness)
- Hello Jello (family, life after college, animals)
- Teddy Lifeslurper, ttc (humour, IVF, ART)
- Fertility Foibles (infertility, humor, adoption)
- Life Induces Thoughts, Mostly Random (grief, acceptance, family)
- You, Me and a Petri (ivf, endometriosis, vermont)
- Drops of Jupiter (family, life, random)
- Last American Girl Standing (infertility (im)patience cycle)
- Infertility and Me (male factor infertility)
- No Oven For the Bun (gestational surrogacy, infertility, MRKH)
- Ova-Ez (babies, love, life)
- emilythehopeless (domestic adoption, dogs, garden)
- Are We There Yet (IVF, Eastern Europe, vacation)
- The Long Journey (secondary infertility, IVF)
- The Conceivable Future (RPL, infertility, IVF)
- The Pitter-Patter (ttc, mfi, life)
- The Secret Life of Sass & Lex (life, ivf, weight loss)
- Whatever He Says (life, humour, faith)
- Life with Endometriosis and PCOS (pcos, endo, waiting)
- Trustee Tracks (education, parenting, special needs)
- Adventures in Glass (FET, IVF, life)
- Sparkly Things Distract Me (40, bad eggs, no more treatments)
- Isn’t TTC Supposed To Be Fun?! (pregnancy, loss, IF)
- Baby Incredible (PCOS, craziness, clomid)
- My Infertility Journey (infertility, PCOS, male-factor)
- Making Me Mom (mfi, iui, faith)
- Eggcetera (IUI, infertility, life)
- Semi-fertile (miscarriage, adoption, future)
- Communique (life, infertility, ivf)
- My Preconceived Notion (single mother by choice, pregnancy over 40, donor embryo)
- Ninapintasantamaria’s Blog (life, pregnancy, snark)
- Mommy Someday? (secondary infertility, parenting, IUI)
- Parenthood for Me (infertility, adoption, coping)
- Elusive BFP (FET, loss, life)
- Human, Being (self-discovery, love, health)
- All My Peccadilloes… (infertility, life, teaching)
- That’s My Answer (fun, pop-culture, question of the day)
- Outside My Head (parenting, yoga, photos)
- Tammy’s Journey (religion, life, donor eggs/embryos)
- Heeeeere Storkey, Storkey! (twins, pregnancy, life)
- Exploring Chaos (pregnancy, adjusting, life )
- PCOS SOS (frustration, infertility, life)
- Invivo (IVF, GIFT, life)
- Unproductively So (infertility, loss, hope)
- Wheresmy2lines (donor eggs, pcos, life)
- Yes, We’re Parents! (parenting after infertility, infertility, humor)
- Chronicles of… (IVF#4; miscarriage; life)
- little birdhouse (cooking, cats, knitting)
- I Just Want To Be A Mom (pregnancy after IVF)
- The Mind of ~Ifer (marriage, memories, random)
- All Aboard the Pity Boat (infertility, running, life)
- Run Amok Amok (infertility life marriage)
- Baby Hungry (new to if, marriage, emotional effects of if)
- Our Family Beginnings (adoption, child, life)
- Learning To Let Go (infertility, marriage, depression)
- Lifeslurper (donor, over 40, infertility)
- Adding to the Pack (MFI, IUI, PCOS)
- The Unfair Struggle (mfi, 4 month break, life)
- My Own Little World (infertility, ttc, lesbian)
- Our Someday Family… (ttc, mfi, beginning the IF journey)
- Rottweilers Ate My Laptop (rottweilers, technology, life)
- Scarlet Baby (life, male factor, infertility)
- Hello, my name is M (loss, ivf, emotional health)
- This Time Around (secondary if, pcos, ttc#2)
- Busted Tube: Adventures in Infertility (miscarriage, ttc, hope)
- A Virtual Hobby Store and Coffee Shop (news, food, music)
- Chasing That Dream (endometriosis, adoption, hysterectomy)
- GettingThere (adoption, future, endometriosis)
- Mindful Meandering (RPL, IVF, infertility)
- Hopes and Dreams for Us (infertility, depression, child-free living)
- GotchaBaby (adoption, parenting, random)
- Body Diaries by Lucy (PCOS, IVF, IF)
- Equal Opportunity Hater (annoyances, IVF, pregnancy)
- Donor Eggs Journey (donor eggs, ivf)
- Infertili- T & A (ivf, waiting, bitching)
- Along Life’s Little Journey (pregnancy, life, endometriosis)
- Slice of Pie (ivf, second opinion, food)
- Raining Raining (fertility, marriage, life)
- This could be anyone story (life, love, loss)
- Back into the Fire (infertility, foster care)
- Chronic Pelvic Pain (undiagnosed, pain, life)
- Hoping for our own Peanut (infertility, IVF, pregnancy)
- Just Multiply by 2 (twins, parenting, life)
- Salvageable (recurrent loss, marriage, life)
- Melissa’s Life as She Knows It (infertility, books, vacation)
- A Page In My Book (family, boys, photos)
- Endo-A-Go-Go (donor egg IVF)
- No Lingerie Here… (ttc-after-mc, weightloss, life)
- Weber’s in Action (IVF #1, NOA, family)
- ethi-hope-ia: the journey to our sweet baby boy (ethiopia, international, adoption)
- The list is now closed for August. The list for September will open on 8/30.
Q: What if I miss a day?
A: Catch up the next day by doubling your comments–12 comments instead of 6.
Q: What is an Iron Commenter?
A: Not for the faint-of-heart. People who wish to be an Iron Commenter and be entered on the Iron Commenter honour roll need to leave a comment on every blog on the participants list (exceptions are blogs that require you to have a special log-in, such as some LiveJournal accounts or other similar situations). You can spread out this commenting any way you wish over the whole week, but the final comment needs to be left by midnight on the 28th (EST). Reaching Iron Commenter status is done on an honour system. Please email me if you earn Iron Commenter status so I can add you to the wall of honour.
Q: Why do I have to add that bit of code to my sidebar?
A: The code is the latest icon (the icon changes colour every month so you know that you’re on the right list). This month, the icon is cranberry, the next month it will be red, etc. The reason is two-fold: (1) it enables more people to find out about IComLeavWe and (2) it gives you easy access to the current list once the commenting week actually begins and better ensures that you’ll use it. Too many times, people sign up and forget to actually do IComLeavWe and this icon gives you a daily reminder (with the dates on it) every time you open your own blog. The icon is linked back to the current list. On the 28th, remove the icon from your blog. A new one will be created for the next month.
Q: It’s the 23rd and I just saw this for the first time on my friend’s blog! I want to join the list–why can’t I?
A: Because IComLeavWe happens every month, once the list is closed, it’s closed. If you’re finding out about this on the 23rd, you can’t join the current month. But leave yourself a note to check back in a week on the 1st and you can sign up for the next month.
Q: You said the list closes on the 21st. Well, it’s still the 21st where I am. Why aren’t you moving my information onto the list?
A: All dates and times are U.S. Eastern Standard Time (UTC/GMT -5 hours).
Q: What if no one comments on my blog and I have no comments to return?
A: Well, that really doesn’t happen for the most part, but in that case, simply choose another blog and add an additional comment. The goal is to hit 6 comments daily as a minimum. Going over that is fantastic and encouraged.
Q: Mel, my question wasn’t covered at all. What do I do?
A: Email me; I’m quite friendly. It helps to place “IComLeavWe” in the subject line. You could also check this post which contains the history of IComLeavWe and see if you can glean anything there.
Looking for the comment section? It has been closed on this post. Use the form in the directions to add yourself to the list.
July 28, 2009 No Comments
BlogHer Wrap Up
This isn’t really the true BlogHer wrap-up because I will post notes once I have those ready this week and when video goes up for the sessions I attended, I’ll link to them. But these are my final (I hold the right to say more) thoughts on the conference.
This year differed greatly from last year. Last year, I likened the conference to visiting Wonderland and then having to return home, knowing that the white rabbit and red queen were still going to be existing without you. This year, it was more like the spinning tea cup ride at Disney World. It’s fun–it’s absolutely fun–but it’s also chaotic and you can only catch snatches of things and it makes the world feel like you can’t take it all in. Everything is just spinning by you too quickly to be sure of things.
And that’s sort of how this conference felt.
It was fun, and I learned a lot. But it was exhausting and everything kept moving without down time unless you decided to sit something out. And I sort of have this approach to amusement parks too. I figure I’m finally there and I don’t want to miss anything. So instead of sitting things out and going back to the hotel to rest, I go on all the rides.
And I went on all the freakin’ rides at BlogHer.
I met hundreds of bloggers I read and hundreds more that I now will read. I went to five sessions–one from each track and a Geek Lab. I wrote posts and tweeted and updated my Facebook status and uploaded photos (sorry, Denise, not to Flickr yet). I went to parties this time…sort of. I collected swag this year. So much swag that I needed to get another suitcase to get it all home. It is mostly not for me–I have it separated out into multiple bags right now so I can pass it along to others. But still. I had meals with friends and saw celebrities (Paula Deen, Dave Lieberman, Tim Gunn!). I cried. A lot. I laughed. A lot. I got no sleep. I felt like my entire nervous system was inflamed by the time the conference ended.
There are people who bitch about BlogHer, who leave unhappy, but I really believe that with a conference that size, a lot of it is what you make of it. I went to a school with 40,000 undergraduates, and some people walked out saying it was a great school, and others walked out saying it was a terrible school. But when you are speaking about an enormous entity such as a school or a conference, I really think that a lot of it becomes what you make of it. Did you actively seek a change when you became unhappy? Did you ask for help? Did you wait for people to come to you, or did you walk up to every person you could and start a conversation?
Because we’re all writers there–no one is better than anyone else. And if you’re going to come with the attitude that you’re owed something–owed attention because you have a certain amount of readers or owed accolades for your writing, you’re going to leave disappointed. Because, as I’ve already said, we’re all writers. And everyone thinks their little blog is special. Instead, all that should be left at the lobby doors and people will get the most from the conference if they turn to everyone they meet–from the random person sitting next to them at a panel to the other woman washing her hands in the bathroom–and start a conversation. Ask them about their blog. Hopefully they will ask you about your blog. A conversation begins.
Was the conference more commercial this year? Certainly. There were more sponsors and there were more business-y people walking around, trying to promote their business while interacting with bloggers. Was it a little annoying? Yes. But again, it was avoidable. And I could also choose to try to engage the speaker as a fellow person rather than follow their agenda to tell me about their product by asking them questions about where they’re from or if they’ve ever been to Chicago. And, sometimes I just smiled to be polite and took their card and then moved on rather than eating up more time explaining that I’m a kosher vegetarian and while their custom jerky business sounds cool, it just isn’t for me.
I saw some pretty sucky attitude on some people, comment-worthy sucky attitude. And like I did with my big college, I took my big conference and I avoided that suckatude because it wasn’t worth getting upset about. I left the party or I shifted spots and I used my time to find the most kick-ass people in the world. I freakin’ met Kathy and Io and Emily. I got to see Cecily and Sarah again. I spent time with Alexa and Aurelia and Kate and Briar and Magpie and Julia. I got to see people from DC and my fellow BlogHer CEs and some of my favourite bloggers I met back when I did book publicity. I took Nora’s head around the conference and took pictures.
And you know what, that sucky attitude that I witnessed in person, I also witness it every freakin’ day in the blogosphere. It is not a problem with the conference; it is a problem with human beings. People who won’t help you out unless they think they can get something out of it, or who think they’re better, or who ignore you…that happens every place in life. And BlogHer is not immune to it.
But it is an amazing place to be. Before I left, a blogger (I will keep her anonymous in case she doesn’t want me to tell her words) leaned in and whispered in my ear, “you saved my life.” I went back up to the room and cried and cried. It was a complete catharsis that I couldn’t reach on my own because I was so damn tired. But she brought me there because she said the most important reason why I blog and why I read: because we are saving each other.
When we write the words out of our heart and take them off our chest so they can stop eating us alive, we’re saving ourselves. And when we comment on another person’s blog, letting them know that their words matter, we’re saving them. When we reach out and support another person, we are literally saving their life. And I’m not talking in the hypothetical sense. Humans cannot live without contact, without interaction. Blogging makes the world less lonely, the world less difficult.
It is that Irish proverb–two shorten the road. And carrying each other’s burdens simply by listening, by saying with our actions, “I care”–that is not just shortening the road. That is saving a soul.
That is why I go back to BlogHer and why I walk away each conference saying that I had an amazing time. Because I go in looking to connect with other humans–not fawn on them or hope that they read me too–and I connect with other humans. And I walk away feeling full from the experience.
July 27, 2009 69 Comments
Seriously, More Photos from Blogher
Many years ago, Josh was one of the nominees at a major award show and we were at this shmancy cocktail party before the award ceremony began. Suddenly, I heard myself scream out, “that’s Judd Hirsch” and saw my finger pointing at the actor, Judd Hirsch. I seriously don’t know what got into me. Judd looked at me and continued walking. I mean, how does one respond to a person pointing at you with their mouth hanging open while they tell you who you are?
I did the same thing last year at BlogHer. The elevator doors were closing and I screamed out, “you’re Her Bad Mother” at Catherine Connors. Who gave me the same look Judd Hirsch gave me.
And apparently, my body wanted to do it one more time.
I was sitting by a door when it opened and it walked Paula Deen with her security detail. She smiled and waved and I shouted out, “you’re Paula Deen” and she said, “I am.” And she kept walking. But I followed. And I took pictures.
So uncool.
She is really an incredible performer. We haven’t made her recipes, so I can’t speak to the food. But she is a joy to watch. So funny, so charming. Very warm.
And then there was Tim Gunn. I didn’t wait in line to chat with him because…well…my wardrobe needs more help than one man can give it.
But he signed Deb’s shirt.
I met Liza (pronounced Liz-ah, not Lie-zah) FINALLY. She is a superconnector, bringing me together with so many friends. And she is my doppelganger. We literally switched places at two schools–crisscrossed our undergrad and grad spaces. And she is just so funny and cool and sweet and wonderful.
Devra, Sarah, and I like to take this picture at every conference. I look like Sarah’s child. The story of Sarah will take too long to place here, but I realize that how we know each other makes for a very good story so hopefully I will have it together by the Friday Roundup this week.
The last night also turned out to be the annual Venetian Night in Chicago on the water complete with fireworks.
While we were outside, I told Josh that I wanted to run back in and take a picture of the sign for the last time. But workmen were taking it down. Unassembling BlogHer. I thanked them for their hard work–the undoing must be just as tremendous as the doing. Josh whispered to me that if I hugged them, I would truly become a caricature of myself. So I refrained.
July 27, 2009 21 Comments
