Posts from — May 2009

Show and Tell is wasted on elementary schoolers. Join several dozen bloggers weekly to show off an item, tell a story, and get the attention of the class. In other words, this is Show and Tell 2.0. Everyone is welcome to join, even if you have never posted before and just found out about Show and Tell for the first time today. So yank out a photo of the worst bridesmaid’s dress you ever wore and tell us the story; show off the homemade soup you cooked last night; or tell us all about the scarf you made for your first knitting project. Details on how to participate are located at the bottom of this post.

Let’s begin.

Well, first and foremost, I changed the icon. I figured a new year of Show and Tell deserved an icon change.

But what I’m really showing and telling today are two purses that my siblings (and by my “siblings,” I mean that my sister chose them and then included my brother and BIL) gave me this week. The amusing part was that I was with my mother and the Wolvog in the mall and I told him that we needed to stop by the store to buy a formal purse for an event I’m going to this week. My mother nervously told me not to do that and after arguing about it for a moment, gave me the box she had been carrying around. Great minds think alike–my siblings bought me two purses that could both go with my black sheath dress. Your thoughts on which one I should use?

Option A: a black clutch with feathers and beads.

Option B: a red, textured purse with sparkle added by beads.

I’m wearing a black sheath dress (with a small black cardigan in case it’s cold), black heels, and pearls. I have a sense of which one would be better for the event, but I’m also collecting opinions since I love both purses equally and both are large enough to hold everything I need that night.

What are you showing today?

Click here or scroll down to the bottom of this post if this is your first time joining along (hint: link to the permalink for the post, not the main url for your blog and use your blog’s name, not your name). The list is open from now until late Tuesday night and a new one is posted every week.

Yesterday, I went to buy make-up at the M.A.C. counter and couldn’t have felt like a bigger asshole. The reality is that I’ve never purchased make-up without my sister. She is the sort who knows things. For instance, we are going on holiday this summer and she planned the whole thing for us because she’s smart and organized. She knows what clothes are worth trying on at the store and what make-up goes with my skin tone and how to get out stains.

The problem is that I won’t see her for several more weeks and I need the make-up now. It’s sort of the same thing with when I changed the blog header last fall. In terms of how the blog looked, I didn’t care, I didn’t care, I didn’t care, and then suddenly, I cared–I cared enough to start working on it at 11 p.m. and bother Cali. And that’s sort of where I am with make-up. I didn’t care that almost all of my lipsticks were nine years old (and one…gulp…is probably closer to twenty) and therefore unusable. And then, one day, I decided I did care and I had no idea how to fix the problem.

My sister coached me over the phone, I gathered recommendations via Twitter, and I went to the make-up counter to ask for additional advice. What I did was stand next to the lipstick display, not moving, until someone behind the counter asked me if I needed help. “Yes!” I exclaimed with relief. I asked her to choose the lipstick for me, something that would look good with olive skin and dark hair; a woman who wears a lot of black or brighter colours. No pink.

She picked out a colour called Verve and after applying it for me (apparently, when you stand next to the lipstick display and beg someone else to choose your make-up, they also sense without asking that you are probably not capable of applying it yourself), asked if I liked it. But here’s the thing: all I can see is the make-up. I look like Melissa, with make-up. On other people, I don’t notice the lipstick or foundation. I mean, I can see it if I look closely, but I see it all as just part of their look. With me, I feel like I can’t stop seeing the make-up, therefore, I have no clue whether I like it or not.

She also did my eyes with a little eyeliner called “coffee.” I wore it around the rest of the day and now I need to go back today and buy it. I would take a picture except that my eyebrow appointment isn’t until tomorrow and…damn…no one needs to see that lack of grooming up close. In my defense, I had an eyebrow appointment for last weekend and it got moved to this weekend so…not my fault.

There is a new way to sign up. Please read the directions below.

Welcome back to IComLeavWe. It stands for International Comment Leaving Week, but if you say it aloud, doesn’t it sounds like “I come; [but] leave [as a] we”? And that’s sort of the point. Blogging is a conversation and comments should be honoured and encouraged. I like to say that comments are the new hug–a way of saying hello, giving comfort, leaving congratulations.

Here is the vital information, pure and simple (a more detailed set of rules follows below the list):

• The list opens the 1st of every month. It remains open until the 21st. You can add yourself at any point. The list is open to everyone in the blogosphere–blog writers and/or blog readers.
• Add yourself to the list by filling out this form: The form is now closed for June. The next list will open on 6/30 for July.
• Click here to cut-and-paste this bit of code to add to your sidebar (if you have the old code from another month, remove it and replace it with this one). You need to add the icon or a link to the current list on your blog (see below) and will not be added until it’s up.
• Commenting kicks off every month on the 21st. Please mark it somewhere (calendar, post-it note taped to your computer…), though I will be sending out an email reminder on the 20th. Commenting week runs from the 21st to the 28th. Every day, leave 5 comments and return 1 comment for a total of 6 comments. You are highly encouraged to choose the blogs you comment on from the participants list below, but this is not required.
• I will send a second email on the 28th to remind you to remove the icon from your blog.
• Read below if you want to find out about Iron Commenters.
• The commenting ends on the 28th. We catch our breath and the whole thing starts again the next month on the 1st. Drop in and out according to what is happening in your life between the 21st and the 28th.

1. Stirrup Queens (infertility, twins, books)
2. Through The Eyes Of A Stranger (infertility, adoption, family)
3. My Little Drummer Boys (IVF twins, parenting, pregnancy loss)
4. Sticky Feet (twins, parenting, food)
5. Thoughts By Kim (infertility, weight loss, christianity)
6. Unquestionablelove (new RE, saving for IVF, summertime fun)
7. I’m a Smart One (surrogacy, infertility, parenting after infertility)
8. Infertile Myrtle (endometriosis, iui, infertility)
9. MeAndBaby’s Blog (smc, iui, infertility)
10. No News Isn’t Always Good News (infertility, infertility, infertility)
11. Woman Anyone? (primary subfertility, unexplained infertility, rants)
12. Meepit On Parade (infertility, life, loss)
13. Baby Making Journey (azoospermia,waiting,life)
14. Infertility Instability (PCOS, farming, emotions)
15. Two Peas Waiting for Our Pod (ivf, mfi, pregnancy)
16. Baby Smiling In Back Seat (infertility, twin pregnancy, pottery)
17. Infertility Rocks! (humor, infertility, IVF)
18. Exploring Chaos (pregnancy, life, moving)
19. Run Amok Amok (infertility, life, marriage)
20. Faith, Hope & Poop? (family, parenting, books)
21. Dragondreamer’s Lair (parenting, crafts, secondary infertility)
22. All Things Griffin (infertility, donor insemination)
23. Trying for a Baby (TTC, endometriosis, laparoscopy)
24. Life Induces Thoughts, Mostly Random (grief, acceptance, family)
25. A View On My Life (infertility, therapy, hobbies)
26. Sell Crazy Someplace Else (marriage, donor sperm, food)
27. Parenthood for Me (infertility, adoption, coping)
28. A Fifth Season (grief, life study, family)
29. Making Me Mom (mfi, fibroid, faith)
30. Oh Sanity, Wherefore Art Though? (life, infertility, ttc)
31. Are We There Yet (IVF, nutrition, Europe)
32. Portraits In Sepia (adoption, life, longing)
33. Life with Endometriosis and PCOS (life, endometriosis, pcos)
34. No Stone Unturned (life history, full exposure, overcoming tragedy)
35. Jason & Amber Patterson (ivf, infertility, life)
36. Letting it out (parenting, summer vacation, life)
37. The Pitter-Patter (ttc, infertility, marrakesh)
38. Our Journey To Parenthood (And Beyond) (ruptured ectopic, ttc)
39. Bella And Her Fella (DE/IVF, thyroid cancer, infertility)
40. Unproductively So (infertility, loss, hope)
41. Once Upon a Time (IVF, work, life)
42. My So-Called Life (MTHFR, PCOS, living child-free not by choice)
43. A Family with Ann Ovulation (secondary IF, TTC, life)
44. ="http://tessiekeys.blogspot.com/">Yes, We’re Parents! (infertility, parenthood after infertility, humor)
45. Heeeeere Storkey, Storkey! (twins, ttc #3, life)
46. Adventures in Glass (ivf, pgd, waiting)
47. In Due Time (infertility, pcos, life)
48. Invivo (life, ivf, infertility )
49. Our Surrogacy Adventure (surrogacy, intended mother, life)
50. My Infertility Journey (IVF/ICSI, male factor, PCOS)
51. Not The Path I Chose (secondary if, rpl, weight loss)
52. Body Diaries by Lucy (pcos, if, ivf)
53. Babymaking 101 (pregnancy loss, recovery)
54. My Journey with Endometriosis (endo, ivf, infertility)
55. Alana-isms (secondary infertility, family, teaching)
56. Baby, Borneo, or Bust (miscarriage, pregnancy, career)
57. Ova-EZ (babies, love, life)
58. Hobbit-ish Thoughts & Ramblings (books, recipes, ttc after losses)
59. Baby Manatee (IUI, injectables, everyday life)
60. IF Optimist, then… (infertility, 40+, humor)
61. Creating a Family (adoptive parenting, adoption, infertility)
62. Chasing That Dream (endometriosis, infertility, hysterectomy)
63. On The Road to Baby (infertility, IVF, metaphors)
64. Hello Jello (family, internship, animals)
65. Snarky Kisses (life, relationships, mental health)
66. Dieting Take Two (diet, life, health)
67. The Conceivable Future (RPL, infertility, books)
68. Tammy’s Journey (Christian, donor eggs/embryos, life)
69. The In’s & Out’s of Endo (endometriosis, pain, infertility)
70. Seeking Serendipity (IVF, life, teaching)
71. Lifeslurper (ivf after 40)
72. The Not So Secret Life Of Us (recurrent miscarriages, life)
73. My Egg, Your Nest (infertility, gestational carrier, surrogacy)
74. Getting There (infertility, future, adoption)
75. Wishing4One (ivf, infertility, life)
76. Ninapintasantamaria’s Blog (pregnancy, life, snark)
77. Just Multiply by 2 (twins, parenting, life)
78. Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Pampers (infertility, 2nd trimester loss, military)
79. Journey to a Wondraful Baby (infertility, adoption, G-d)
80. Everyone Else But Me (infertility, ICSI, adoption)
81. Weber’s In Action (ivf, mfi, family)
82. Thinking Positively (endometriosis, adoption, secondary infertility)
83. Wombded (infertility, pregnancy, fear)
84. Chronic Pelvic Pain (pain, lupron, life)
85. The Life of Liv (infertility silliness, IUI, IVF)
86. The Big IF (infertility, pregnancy, emotions)
87. This Could Be Anyone’s Story (life, love, depression)
88. Baby? Yes, please! (infertility, ivf)
89. Wandering Wonderment (life, mama-dom, philosophizing)
90. Non-elusive BFP (loss, FET, acupuncture)
91. Hope Endures (infertility, acupuncture, faith)
92. Communique (life, infertility)
93. With G-d All Things Are Possible (ivf, fet, ectopic)
94. Fertile Journeys (infertility, miscarriage, ttc)
95. Skrambled (life, infertility, loss)
96. Life, Love, and TTC Mysteries (infertility, ivf, faith)
97. Barefoot and (Not) Pregnant (pregnancy, ivf, food/wine/tv)
98. Inconceivable (noa, life, next-steps)
99. Baby To Be (ivf, pcos, loss)
100. The Yerkes Life ~ Learning to Embrace God’s Plans (infertility, life, family)
101. Salvageable (marriage, life, work)
102. Wheresmy2lines (donor eggs, pcos, life)
103. Mama Bear (domestic infant adoption)
104. My Preconceived Notion (SMC, donor embryo, pregnancy over 40)
105. Conceive This! (mfi, ivf/icsi, fet)
106. Learning through the IF Journey (infertility, PCOS, faith)
107. All Grown Up (domestic infant adoption, waiting, random)
108. Gotchababy (adoption, parenting, random)
109. Elana’s Musings (twins, parenting newborns, randomness)
110. Becoming Whole (emotional abuse recovery, uncertain family-building future, ponderings)
111. La Protaganista (infertility, mental health, relationships)
112. Loving Thee… And More (parenting, family, politics)
113. I Just Want To Be a Mom (ivf, summer, remodeling)
114. JunebugsMusings (life, infertility, travel)
115. Two Shorten the Road (preemie, infertility/loss,
     unicornuate uterus)
116. Eye Heart Internet (ivf, expat, france)
117. Ruminations (parenting, life, random)
118. I Never Thought it Made Sense Anyway (ivf, infertility, side effects)
119. Mommy Someday (infertility, daughter, pregnancy)
120. Sippy Cups Are Not For Starbucks (sarcasm, parenting, life)
121. All in G-d’s Time (mfi, life, dealing)
122. Thus Is The Life (pcos, faith, life)
123. …Might Just Be Enough (pregnancy after ttc 1 year, life, family)
124. Musings of a Fat Chick (SMC, IVF, PCOS)
125. Semi-fertile: when the egg is willing but the womb is weak (miscarriage, love, hubby)
126. Our Story: A Blog about Adoption, Infertility, and IVF (adoption, infertility, and ivf)
127. Eggcetera (infertility, IUI, laparoscopy)
128. Bump Fairy (gestational surrogacy, family, advocacy)
129. Slice of Pie (IVF, second opinions, food)
130. The form is now closed for June. The next list will open on 6/30 for July.

Q: What if I miss a day?
A: Catch up the next day by doubling your comments–12 comments instead of 6.

Q: What is an Iron Commenter?
A: Not for the faint-of-heart. People who wish to be an Iron Commenter and be entered on the Iron Commenter honour roll need to leave a comment on every blog on the participants list (exceptions are blogs that require you to have a special log-in, such as some LiveJournal accounts or other similar situations). You can spread out this commenting any way you wish over the whole week, but the final comment needs to be left by midnight on the 28th (EST). Reaching Iron Commenter status is done on an honour system. Please email me if you earn Iron Commenter status so I can add you to the wall of honour.

Q: Why do I have to add that bit of code to my sidebar?
A: The code is the latest icon (the icon changes colour every month so you know that you’re on the right list). This month, the icon is dark blue, the next month it will be red, etc. The reason is two-fold: (1) it enables more people to find out about IComLeavWe and (2) it gives you easy access to the current list once the commenting week actually begins and better ensures that you’ll use it. Too many times, people sign up and forget to actually do IComLeavWe and this icon gives you a daily reminder (with the dates on it) every time you open your own blog. The icon is linked back to the current list. On the 28th, remove the icon from your blog. A new one will be created for the next month.

Q: It’s the 23rd and I just saw this for the first time on my friend’s blog! I want to join the list–why can’t I?
A: Because IComLeavWe happens every month, once the list is closed, it’s closed. If you’re finding out about this on the 23rd, you can’t join the current month. But leave yourself a note to check back in a week on the 1st and you can sign up for the next month.

Q: You said the list closes on the 21st. Well, it’s still the 21st where I am. Why aren’t you moving my information onto the list?
A: All dates and times are U.S. Eastern Standard Time (UTC/GMT -5 hours).

Q: What if no one comments on my blog and I have no comments to return?
A: Well, that really doesn’t happen for the most part, but in that case, simply choose another blog and add an additional comment. The goal is to hit 6 comments daily as a minimum. Going over that is fantastic and encouraged.

Q: Mel, my question wasn’t covered at all. What do I do?
A: Email me; I’m quite friendly. It helps to place “IComLeavWe” in the subject line. You could also check this post which contains the history of IComLeavWe and see if you can glean anything there.

Looking for the comment section? It has been closed on this post. Use the form in the directions to add yourself to the list.

MLO made the house blueprint interactive so now you can jump to a room on the blogroll by clicking within the room on the map. I’m panting a little in excitement over my geeky love for her. Not only does the lady make her own ketchup, but she can also do very cool computer things. Go on…try it.

Here is the master list for the nineteenth tour of the Barren Bitches Book Brigade. What is the Barren Bitches Book Brigade? It’s a book club from the comfort of your own living room. The book club is conducted entirely online and open to anyone (male or female) in the infertility/pregnancy loss/assisted conception/adoption/parenting-after-infertility world (as well as any other related category I inadvertently left off the list). It is called a book tour because everyone reads the same book and then poses a question to the group. Participants choose a few questions to answer and then post their response on their blog. Readers can jump from blog to blog, commenting along the way. We read both fiction and non-fiction.

Anyone can jump aboard–it’s a book club where you can drop in and out as you wish and all in the community are welcome.

Book: Navigating the Land of If (I know! My book!)
Author: Melissa Ford
Start Date: May 26
Question Due: June 24
Question List Sent Out: June 26
Post Date: June 29
(need an explanation of how a book tour works? Click here to go to a list of posts on the past book tours as well as information about future tours.)
Something New: the participants on this tour will choose the next book.

About Navigating the Land of If: How can I describe my own book without it being twenty kinds of awkward?. Taken from the book’s website: “Navigating the Land of If gives the nitty-gritty on injections, rejections, biting your tongue during happy parent-to-be conversations, and trying not to cry over baby shower invitations.” You can read an excerpt of the book right here.

Barren Bitches Book Brigade List (The blogs below are participating on this current book tour. On June 29, you’ll be able to jump from post to post to read a plethora of opinions and thoughts on Navigating the Land of If. I will keep adding to this list until 11 p.m. on June 24. The list is currently open)

Stirrup Queens and Sperm Palace Jesters (Yeah, I’m participating for my own book, so what? I’m not ruining perfect Barren Bitches attendance over some awkwardness)
The Annex
The Road Less Travelled
Baby Smiling in Back Seat
Weebles Wobblog
Baby Steps to Baby Shoes
Secrets of an Infertile Mom
Weber’s in Action
A View on My Life
Meepit on Parade
The Dragondreamer’s Lair
Clio
Sell Crazy Someplace Else
Hannah Wept, Sarah Laughed
Baby Shmaybe?
Baby Making Journey
Birch and Maple
A Real Life
Hope in Briarrose
Sticky Feet
Here We Go Again
Tears are for Babies
It’s Not a Clown Car
Hello, My Name is M…and I’m Infertile

Not on the list and want to join? Drop me an email at thetowncriers@gmail.com. You can add yourself up until 11 p.m. on June 24.

How the book tour works:

(1) leave a comment or send me an email (thetowncriers@gmail.com) saying that you’re interested in participating. I need your blog name, blog url, and email address.

(2) read Navigating the Land of If by June 24 (or at least enough of it in order to ask a question to the group).

(3) create a single question that would kick off a discussion (in other words, any question that leads to more than a “yes” or “no” answer where someone can express their opinion) and mail it to me on June 24 (or any time beforehand). I will send you a reminder email close to the date. Click here to see sample questions from tour #4.

(4) on June 26, I will send you a list of possible questions. Everyone will choose 3 questions off the list and answer them in a blog entry.

(5) on June 29, people will begin to post their entry. Each day, I will post a linked list of all the people putting up their entry that day so people can go around and read the entries and comment (start a discussion back and forth in the comments section). Reading the entries and commenting on the posts is the best part of the tour–by the end of the week, you should have a comment from every participant (and maybe even a few new permanent blog readers).